I met two guys at work, both Mexican, we became friends. My neighbors are an Hispanic couple (he from El Salvador, she from Panama) so I introduced them. Next thing I know, all four are going to the movies together and didn't invite me, even though I was the one who introduced them.
Same with Whites, Blacks and Asians.
It sucks to be the only member of your race around. It seems you're always excluded. Why are people like that? :(
2006-11-25 00:43:18 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Sociology
The culture (habit) is different. So the language uses too.
Some voice intonation can be hard.
But, keep trying. And be gentle :)
2006-11-25 00:45:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignorance, and natural social/animal behavior.
Butterfly 11, Daffodil 19.
There was a social psych class in which the professot passed out a game. It was kind of the opposite of Bingo, I guess, where everyone played for him/herself, but people dropped out one by one somehow. Now, every other person was labelled Butterfly 11, and the other every other person was labelled Daffodil 19. As people started to drop out, they were found to route for people labelled the same as them- even though the label didn't exist before the entered the room that day, and even though they had already lost and there was no way that other people's winning affected them!
By the way, by routing for someone similar, you are actually routing against the ones who are not.
If we can develop our groups based on something as temporary and stupid as that, then think fo how hard it will be ot change language and racial ties!
If we were all aware of this little experiment, and see how stupid it all is, we might be able to get somewhere.
But some people are just trying to work, feed themselves/families, and mkae it through the day before they give a thought to the things they do so naturally.
You could say something, like, hey, that was messed up.
It is messed up.
But it's totally, animalistically natural.
2006-11-25 01:00:12 · answer #2 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you can still get back into the group. Just try not to feel hurt/dissapointed because they will feel your negative energy and that never helps. They may have simply warmed up to each other quicker because of language/background etc. similarities. But the fact that they warmed up to each other quickly doesn't mean you will be excluded (even though you weren't invited for this once). You can try to make an effort and organize a get together, and enjoy your time with them. Think positive. If these don't work, talk to one of them whom you feel closest to, communication always helps, at least you will know whether you could have done anything more. Good luck!
2006-11-25 04:57:24 · answer #3 · answered by Janelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe they just don't like you (sorry, just kidding). No, I'm sure speaking Spanish could make them feel comfortable, like they were back home w/ their friends and families. As far as other races go I think people are just naturally drawn to people that look more like they do. They also probably feel they are more apt to share things like speech, interests and styles (whether real or perceived). For those reasons I really wouldn't take it personally. Also, maybe it just seems like they're spending more time together than you think. Why don't you ask them all to come out w/ you. Maybe you could bring a friend or friends that aren't Hispanic to create a more diversified group. Or you could offer to treat them all to dinner or a movie, only if it's in your budget of course, something that lets them know you appreciate their company. Hopefully, they will see that you like spending time w/ them, and enjoy hanging out w/ them, and include you the next time they go out. Anyway, I wouldn't take it to personally as language and culture can really create a strong bond. Sorry for rambling and good luck.
2006-11-25 01:17:56 · answer #4 · answered by GreyGHost29 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never used to be. The triumph of narrow special interests in all walks of life demanded political correctness and America fell for it and is now being blackmailed to not move away. Parents have long taught their children to beware the white man but it is in hyper drive now. It is so obvious that I point it out to adults and remark on how dangerous it is to young children, especially as they become teens. My best friends are a black couple whom I've known since they were in early teens. I am their child's godparent but I have noticed that since people have taken sides on the immigration question in U.S. that those of us who intelligently point out the dying American culture are branded as bad or worse. Not so with Mark and Shelly and their cutie patootie kid but still, there is only so far one can go and only so close one can get before the racial fence is erected. Never that way in 70s, 80s or early 90s. I despise all special interests and their Activists as users of their own "people."
2006-11-25 01:25:49 · answer #5 · answered by ALWAYS GOTTA KNOW 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They might prefer to be with each other because of their culture, language, background, and country they were from. I am sure that if you try to join into their conversation more, they will invite you to the movies the next time they go out. You need to communicate with them better because maybe they feel that it is harder to communicate with people outside of their culture. Try to show them that you will not discriminate or criticize and you will respect their lifestyles that are different from yours.
2006-11-25 06:08:10 · answer #6 · answered by youngwoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its different if you grew up with a friend from a different race. But its about what type bond you have with them and if you have the same morals. The reason why its so hard because we were raised by different backgrounds and morals. We have to understand each others upbringing and treat each other equally.
2006-11-25 00:52:39 · answer #7 · answered by hardworkur84 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The human race I have no trouble with and the canine and feline races have been pretty easy to establish relationships with as well.
Perhaps INDIVIDUALS having trouble making friends are not good friends to have in the first place ! You cannot be a good friend unless you ARE a good friend at first !
2006-11-25 03:56:54 · answer #8 · answered by Kitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey dont worry about it. They might just feel more comfortable with ppl they who they can speak in their language to. Im sure they still want to talk to you. Next time show them you are interested in their culture by asking how to say certain words in Spanish and Im sure they will see that you are interested in speaking with them. But you can still make friends with ppl that are not from your race. As a matter of fact, NONE of my friends are from my race and they get along with me just fine!! I'm ethinic. you can email me if you like.
2006-11-25 00:50:22 · answer #9 · answered by funkucla!!! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋