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Is there a safe or not so safe time for sex? I am a guy and do not know of these things. Right now we do not want another child. But I hate to use rubbers.

2006-11-24 19:16:55 · 22 answers · asked by mnbernier@sbcglobal.net 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting Newborn & Baby

22 answers

BEWARE of the misconception that breastfeeding moms with no periods can't get pregnant. It happened to me! Now I have two boys only 15 months apart. They're bigger now, but it was soooo hard when they were little! They were both in diapers at the same time, we stayed broke. Ask yourself, what do you hate more...Using a condom, or having another baby so soon. It can and will happen! She should talk to her doctor about safe methods of birth contol that could be used while breastfeeding. If you know with 100% certainty that you absolutely want NO more children, get a vesectomy. My husband did. It wasn't as painful as you might think and he'll never have to use a condom again and I'll never have to worry about missing my pill or something like that.

2006-11-24 19:32:16 · answer #1 · answered by Carrie 3 · 3 0

Read the book Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing. It will tell you everything you need to know. Basically it depends on how she is breastfeeding. A type of breastfeeding called ecological breastfeeding is as effective as the pill for the first six months. After that it becomes less effective and most people who use this method end up with children 18 to 36 months apart without using any other form of birth control. When I ecologically breastfed my daughter I didn't get a single period until she was 20 months old and got pregnant 6 months later.

Ecological breastfeeding involves feeding the baby on demand both day and night, no bottles (not even of pumped breast milk), no pacifier, baby sleeping with parents, and mom taking one nap per day with the baby (okay, so I didn't always do that one as she got older). There might be a few other conditions, so I'd recommend checking out the book or do a google search on "ecological breastfeeding".

Please note that I'm not saying your wife should do ecological breastfeeding or that it's the best way to breastfeed, but only that it's the only way that is really effective as birth control.

2006-11-25 10:12:55 · answer #2 · answered by AerynneC 4 · 0 0

Use condoms! She can get pregnant at any time. Periods do NOT determine whether or not your body releases the egg. They are 2 separate things. If you don't like condoms, you can always try female condoms. They are a little tricky to learn how to use at first, and a little less effective than male condoms, but it's better than using nothing, (you can order them on the internet). Also... don't forget about the oral sex option, especially since she's not dealing with her monthly. Just make sure that it's a 2 way street. She did just risk her life to have your kid, so make sure she is as happy and satisfied (for real) as you are.

And if she's not having her periods, get her more vitamins and rich foods. She may not be getting enough nourishment for both her and the baby. You don't want her to damage her body more than pregnancies do already. Malnourishment may not be the cause for your wife's situation, but keep an eye on it just in case. Your wife and child deserve the best health they can get.

2006-11-25 03:35:12 · answer #3 · answered by kim b 2 · 0 1

I hate to break it to you, but to be safe, I would come up with another form of birth control. Many women get pregnant after having a baby even while breastfeeding. getting her period only means she has already ovulated, so its too late by then. With my first I didn't get my period for 3-4 months after I stopped breastfeeding. With my son I was still breast feeding and got my period when he was 3-4 months old. Also, I know too many friends who used the low dose pill while breast feeding and found themselves preggo when their baby was only nine months. If you don't like condoms, there are spermicial type foams that you can try.

2006-11-25 04:38:47 · answer #4 · answered by scottnkris819 2 · 1 0

Women who breastfeed often do not have periods but are fertile. Some women are more fertile and ovulate more after pregnancy because of the body's desired to keep pregnant. Sometimes the body ovulates more than once a month even. Just because she is having periods does not mean she is not ovulating. Chances are she is more fertile now than when she got pregnant.

I think it is selfish to say I don't want to use rubbers but I want to have sex. You either want the protection or you don't. You cannot have it all.

Congrats on the baby!

2006-11-25 05:12:48 · answer #5 · answered by Summer H 3 · 2 0

Some women don't have a period the whole time that they are nursing. Others see their period return right away. Anything is normal. Personally, my periods returned at 10 mos with my first, 9.5 mos with my second and about 16 mos with my third.

If your wife meets ALL the following conditions, then breastfeeding is as effective as condoms for birth control.

- Baby must be less than 6 mos old.
- She must not have had a period.
- Baby must be EXCLUSIVELY breastfed - no supplements, solids, etc. Best if baby is fed on demand and nurses at night.

It is important to note that she will ovulate once before she bleeds, so unless she is watching her body signs closely (cervical position and cervical mucous, charting temps, etc.) she might miss when her first ovulation is and could get pregnant without ever having a period.

If she chooses to take hormonal birth control, it's important to note that she should take a progestin-only contraceptive, and NOT one that contains estrogen as this could harm her milk supply.

2006-11-25 09:54:58 · answer #6 · answered by momma2mingbu 7 · 1 1

If she is willing, there are birth control pills for breastfeeding mothers that still allow them to produce breast milk. I can see the rubbers messing with the mood, it's always weird when my hubby has to use them because I messed up with the pill, so I see where you are coming from. But it is very easy for her to get pregnant after having a baby and while nursing. It's short term though and only a year out of your life for you to sacrifice when she sacrificed for 9 months and is still sacrificing for the baby and will probably continue to sacrifice for at least 18 years if not more. Best of luck.

2006-11-25 03:30:16 · answer #7 · answered by chrissy757 5 · 3 0

I breastfed my son, did not have periods and had sex THINKING that I was safe and 4 weeks later, here I am pregnant again. You are not safe. Keep using condoms or have her go get on birth control. It is safe to be on birth control while breast feeding. If she doesn't want to be on birth control or her doctor won't put her on it, use a diaphragm.

2006-11-25 03:29:23 · answer #8 · answered by Rebecca M 3 · 3 0

breast feeding has nothing at all to do with you not having a period or getting pregnant. when i went through both my pregnancy 1 pregnancy (twins) dr. told me no sex 4 @ least 6 wks. i went and got on the depo shot (birth control) a wk later and was having sex maybe 2 days after that no problems. long as she's not feeling and kind of pain or discomfort she should be fine. but she still can get preg. so use some form of b-control. better safe than sorry my sister -in-law has daughters that r 11 months apart so b carefull

2006-11-25 03:39:53 · answer #9 · answered by pame_luv 1 · 0 2

I don't think there is a unsafe time for her. As long as everything is feeling alright for her after having a child and she's ready. I would ask her. And if you don't want another child you're just gonna have to get used to rubbers until maybe she can get on some birthcontrol when she's done breast feeding (I'm not sure if it's good to take birthcontrol while breastfeeding).


In response of sweets anwsere: Breastfeeding doesn't stop you from starting your period of becoming prego again. Not for every woman that is.

2006-11-25 03:20:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 3

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