I am still wearing my wedding rings 6 month after hubby passed away is that normal?

Question

When someone mentions that I am still wearing the rings I just do not know what to say to them and if I try to take them off I feel sick to my stomach.

Answer 1

I've seen women who were their rings for years after their husband passes away. Be true to yourself, if you feel sick to your stomach from taking the rings off you need to leave them on for as long as it takes you to heal emotionally. If you want to wear them the rest of your life that is okay. There are no rules on this. Take care.

Answer 2

Honey I am so sorry for what you are going through. My own husband died last year at this time of year. It was 9 months after his death that I had my wedding ring cut off. It was somehthing that I needed to do at that time and so it was right for me

If you are feeling sick when you take them off, you are not ready Idon't care what people say so what. If they are rude enough to ask why you have not taken the rings off.... you smack them up side the head with the truth. You tell them that this whole ordeal has been a nightmare and it is so very painfull every moment of the day and that you find a little bit of comfort in wearing those rings and unless they have suffered as you are suffering they know nothing about it and there fore should not offer an opinion. You will only have to do this one time. Word will spread and no one will say anything to you again..No one wants to be faced with our pain. when they offer advice or make comments that they know nothing about you hit them with your true feelings let the raw pain show and they will back off fast.

God bless you and keep you on this hard journey I am a little ways ahead of you and I can tell you it does get better, it does not go away but you get so you can live with it. You will be happy again. Good Luck

Answer 3

First, I am so sorry for your loss, my husband died 14 years ago and I still miss him. I met him when I was 16, married him when I was 18 and he was my best friend

Well, there is no rule about when you should remove your wedding ring, but do not take it off until you want to. Ignore those people who say thoughtless things to you - they don't know how you feel, because they have not lived through what you have.

Since my husband's death I have learned a lot about grief & bereavement and a couple of things come to mind for your situation.

The first one is that when you are ready to take your ring off you could have it made into another piece of jewellry - a pendant that you could wear, or maybe something for you to keep as a memento (or for your daughter if you have one).

Another thing I heard of recently was where a woman, on the anniversary of her husband's death/anniversary of their wedding/some special occasion, had made arrangements at her local church to have a ceremony performed by her Pastor or Priest. Close family & friends only were invited and during the little service the Priest talked about the love that the couple shared and gently took the ring from her finger and placed it in a special little box for her to keep. The ring had been placed on her finger in that same church 23 years earlier, and for her the words of the Priest and the comfort of having friends & family present, made the removing of her ring, something very special. The ring represented many years of marriage to a wonderful man and to have just taken the ring off and put it in a drawer did not give the occasion the importance and reverence that it deserved.

To conclude, I have since remarried (another wonderful man) and life is good again. I know how truly blessed I am to have had TWO good husbands, some women don't even get ONE!

Good Luck!

Answer 4

First, I am sorry for your loss. You have been through a lot, losing a loved one is very tough, and other people are making your adjustment difficult it seems. When you feel comfortable taking off your ring is your buisness. Mouring,remebering, honoring are all personal choices, and the people who are questioning you about your ring may mean the best, but what they are saying is hurtful (especially since you say it makes you feel sick). Next time, trying saying something positive to them, "Yes, I enjoy remembering happy times with my husband and the rings especially remind me of our wedding day". Something like that, I don't know. Hopefully it will make them see they are intruding on your unique situation, and they can step back. Wear them as long as you want, honey, and best of luck to you

Answer 5

I am sorry for your loss. These people are plain rude. It is none of their business if you were your rings or not. If the rings make you feel connected to your deceased husband then wear them and be comforted. As for what to tell them "I'm a widow not a divorcee".

Answer 6

Sorry to hear about your husbands passing. You wear your wedding ring as long as you want, you don't ever have to take it off it's your choice. Forget what other people say because unless they have lost their spouse they wouldn't understand. Best wishes to you.

Answer 7

You can wear the wedding ring as long as it comforts. It's your memory of him. There is no time frame on your feelings. Wear it and embrace him everyday.

Answer 8

Yes it is normal. It is probably the one and only attachment that you have left towards him. When you are emotionally ready you will retire the ring to a safe resting place.

Answer 9

normal. who is to say what is normal? you're grieving. when YOU are ready the ring will go in a special place off of your hand. for now, wear it if it gives you comfort and/or security.
go with your gut. when the time comes you will decide.
best wishes to you...

Answer 10

It's no ones business that you wear rings. You do what makes you feel comfortable.