I've had 1 hell of a day!?

Question

What should l do?firstly my live in boyfriend of 6 years fell out with me 2 weeks ago and moved back to his mums,he sends me text messages now and again but l really don't know where l stand(l feel l'm in limbo)today our cockatiel died(l had to watch her die for 2 hours because the vet wasn't open,,half an hour before they opened she died)l was crying,my 3 kids were so upset but my boyfriend was working to far away to get to us on time,now at 1.16am he is in town having a ball and getting drunk with his mates(he says l havn't to bother him because he is trying to block everything out)thing is,l miss him so much but feel he's taking the p*ss!any advice out there!!!!

Oh!and the kids are not his,just incase anyone was wandering,l stupidly got married at 18 and it was not ment to be!!!

Answer 1

of course you are going to miss him. that's not something any one can tell you how to stop hurting. but you said you had a bad day, so why are you just sitting at home? why not give a friend a call, go out for a drink, or coffee? here is the thing, for one reason or another he knows that he can move out, go party with his buddies,and not have a care in the world, and he knows that you will be sitting right there just waiting for that next text message,or maybe a phone call from time to time.i can almost bet that he also knows that after he has had his fun, and he calls and say he missed you and wants to come home you will be right there saying yes.so, now its up to you are you willing to just sit around waiting for that text,or call? i sure hope not. so, stop sitting at this computer asking for advise from a bunch of people that you don't know. and go have some fun!! you deserve it.

Answer 2

oh honey thats really awful 6 yrs is a long time but he must feel just as bad except hes able to go out and get over it and yr stuck a home thinking about how it went wrong and this time last year et etc
i think hes moved on to be honest but you must be strong and keep it together have you got a good friend that you could talk to
and try and get out yourself time is the healer and eventually you will get over this
i had an 18yr relationship that i came out of 4 yrs ago and i havent looked back im now with a wonderful person good luck

Answer 3

sorry about ur pet. u can always find a replacement. about ur boy friend, he has good reasons for doing that. its a bit funny though, after an early marriage that never worked u decided to have a line in guy?? i think that idea wasnt so good.maybe u hoped for something serious but guys can not really be trusted, especially if u dont kno wats on their mind. to hell with him and move on. maybe this one too wasnt meant to be. just becareful where u find urself next. dont be a bad example to ur kids, good luck

Answer 4

well u should feel a little better, u got to get it all out in the open.
sorry for ur run of bad luck, don't worry things will turn around. i promise keep ur head up. remember u still have 2 great kids

Answer 5

Whatever you do...DON'T listen to the advice of getting this off and on guy to marry you!! He is not stable for those kids.The relationship sounds toxic and like it'll mess up those kids. And as someone who had baggage, which by the way that baggage is actually chunks of my heart that were put on the outside of me by God for me to love, laugh, learn from, and protect and I feel like a piece of me is gone when they are not nearby...concentrate on your kids. They will help you heal, grow, learn, and love. They will copmplete you. Once you heal from the inside you will start to radiate on the outside and someone deserving for you and your children will surface when you least expect it. Are any of your children girls? Do you want them to grow up thinking its okay to have a man treat you the way this guy does? Even if you don't have a daughter would you want your boys to treat their future women like he does you? Take it from someone who was 19 with 3 children and left her husband despite everyone saying I'd never find a man who wanted me with 3 kids. I couldn't sort them out quick enough and now have been with someone for 8 years who loves us all and is a terrific provider. Just lay back take each day one at a time, and hug your chidlren often, they will help you if you allow them, and those extra hugs they get from you will make them feel even more loved and secure. Let go of the guy before his head games ruin your self esteem and sanity! It's best to drop him and have one big hurt all at once than to get broken down over the years and have a bunch of drawn out hurts. Ignore the text messages, right now you are his anchor to keep him held down in case whatever he left for and went back to his mom's doesn't pan out. You are the fall back girl. Let him go. I know it's been a long time you were with him. If he is the father of your children, then let him go and be peaceful and civil about it for the kids and make sure the kids know that just because mom and dad aren't together doesn't mean you both don't love them still nor does it mean it was because of anything they did. That sometimes moms and dads love each other but just can't get along enough to live together. And once you two are apart, always keep in mind that the children aren't possessions for the two of you to with hold to hurt the other just because one party isn't doing something that the other agrees with. You'll mess them up. Good luck with this. If you focus on the kids and healing yourself, the rest will fall into place. Take it from me, I lived it. You can't give the best of yourself unless you are at peace within yourself.

Answer 6

honey....comfort your kids...don't worry about your fella, it's obvious that he's not bothered, and him telling you not to bother him proves that he has no heart....i am sorry to hear about your pet, i too lost my beloved cockatiel...we had him for years and he died of a stroke..so sorry it happened to you, maybe in the future you could get another one....as for your fella, he wants to be free by the looks of things...let him alone and move on Hun, he's not worth the tears and heartache...yes he is taking the piss.....go out and enjoy yourself with a few mates....when he sees sense he will come back, but it's up to you to decide if you want him back or not, after all where was he when you needed him most....bless you.....x

Answer 7

You don't no where you stand, sure you do you just can't and won't face it.We 've all been there and we've all said we can't face tomorrow without the one we love there beside us.But you do wake up without him there to help you.If you want him back you need to stop calling him stop making yourself aveilable to hWhen he dgf im.He knows your being good and not going out with other men.

Answer 8

put the kids to bed run a bath and soak for hours then itl all be clear ???they his kids you might want to try some relationship guidance sometimes it just takes the right way of looking at it and meadiation helps years are a lot to wast caus yous went through a hard patch

Answer 9

the only advice i can give you is get together with some of your oldest and closest friends and have a long chat and get some perspective on you relationship, you need people around you to support your decisions and to give you moral support

i hope this helps

sometimes you need to take a step back, to see your options

Answer 10

Hang in there it will get better. Every time I think about just throwing my hands up, something inside just won't let me. Usually when you realize that you are just waiting for the next bad thing to happen and stop, the bad things stop.