I got married about 9 months ago and today is my b-day and my husband had to work wich I understand, but he didn't even give me a card or anything,he only said happy b-day this morning. so I started feeling very sad and I was crying, he said Oh I didnt have time this week to buy you anything so I thought that we could both go out tomorrow and you can pick out your present. But doesnt he understand that it's not the present but the thought! I mean even a card and flowers would have been the best gift ever for me. Now since he saw that Im sad he wants us to go tomorrow for me to pick something out. but I honestly dont want anything anymore Its very stupid to get something you picked out yourself, to me it makes no sense! Im just here crying by myself since he left to work. I been working so much overtime this week and today was finaly my day off all for nothing.
2006-11-24 09:30:30 · 14 answers · asked by ♥*´`*•. mommy♥*´`*•. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It would have been nice if he took a few moments to pick out a card, or some flowers, sure. But I learned, especially as you get older and have children of your own, birthdays are for kids.As an adult they become really unimportant. Who wants to be reminded they're a year older anyway?
2006-11-24 09:36:44 · answer #1 · answered by Miami Lilly 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband of 2 years forgot my birthday this year. I am talking not even saying happy birthday, he completely forgot. I know it is hard to not take this personally, but the fact is that a lot of men dont see birthdays as a big deal, not even their own. They do not get as emotional as we do over these things. Mine too said the same things about going to get something after the fact, and I know it is because they feel guilty for forgetting. Believe me he did not do it on purpose and it is not because he doesn't care, so try to just move on from it. Forgive him or you will be the only one sad and upset for a long time.
2006-11-24 09:45:24 · answer #2 · answered by rufi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the man a break! He's working his butt off to support the two of you. He probably is dog tired!
I have been married for six years now and my husband doesn't always get me a gift or a card; however, I know that he means it when he says Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas, or whatever. You sound very selfish and materialistic!
2006-11-24 09:58:38 · answer #3 · answered by Mom of One in Wisconsin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
On the one hand he could have been just too busy and been able to sort anything out but then on the other hand, i am sure that he might have had ample opportunity to get something.... even if it is just a bunch of flowers on the way home and a card from clintons... anyway....
at the same time i think you should see what hapens tommorrow he might have realised how sad you feel and have planned something really special...
if all else fails, put reminders on his blackberry! my wife did and it worked...
2006-11-24 10:30:32 · answer #4 · answered by LondonBlokeE4 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your husband's family didn't place such importance on birthday presents. Try telling him how it made you feel and why, before you judge him based on your own expectations.
Also consider that he might be sending you a signal that he's not happy about something, and this might be an opportunity to resolve that problem instead of starting a fight and making it worse.
Good luck. If none of this is applicable to you I wouldn't be surprised, I was just relaying my experiences with my own wife...
2006-11-24 09:56:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men can be insensitive.
This is Your Birthday....Your husband should have treated You as a Princess.
What to do now? Tell him how you feel and how hurt you are...Let him make this up to for a very long time. It appears from your question, that he had time to get you a card or a gift...most stores are open very late.
Happy B-day to you.
Best to you,
Mav
2006-11-24 09:39:37 · answer #6 · answered by Mav 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you are right; I mean I would feel the same way as you! Well have you tried to tell him how you feel? Try telling him that; explain to him how you feel. Boys are soo dumb though, they don't get things! If you talk to him and he tells you that he understands, most likely he will do it again. It's in their nature; it's not that he means to, it's that he's like that by nature. Talk to him, it will make things better and you will feel better because you let all you emotions go. GOOD LUCK, Happy Birthday and I hope that everything works out between your husband and you.
2006-11-24 09:37:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well don't feel sad. Think 'He loves me and nothing else matters except that were together' then just go hang out with your friends also every time you get Sad think 'he loves me andnothing else matters except that your together'also just tell him that you really dont want to pick something out that just flowers would get your attention also if he just is stuborn enough and decides to go say your hangin with your friends today
2006-11-24 09:38:10 · answer #8 · answered by Writer Gal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you allow someone to determine the state of your emotion. the truth is he is trying to satisfy you and that;s the reason he works overtime. that your husband didnt say happy birthday to you when you expected him to shouldnt be a problem baby. arent you happy he just forgot and not that he went out with another lady. let things that realy matter disturb you and not happy birthday and good morning.
2006-11-24 09:55:46 · answer #9 · answered by favourprosperity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did he say he was sorry? 4 disapionting u n not respecting what is obviously important 2 u. Who ever said love means never having 2 say ur sorry ! could have said love means never hurting in the 1st place n having 2 say ur sorry! If he's sorry n im sure he is let him make it up 2 u. love also mean 4giving if genuine remores is how he feels. let him learn from his mistake not hate himself 4 it.
2006-11-24 10:16:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋