My daughter walked into my bedroom today after I got off work. I am a nurse and had to work late last night. She was talking to me on the bed, and I needed to change clothes but she would not leave. I rarely wear underwear and my daughter did not know that, and I was wearing my scrubs. I needed to change so I just stripped out of my scrubs, and changed into some jeans and a t-shirt. I thought I guess she is old enough to know now. Well she found out. She said "Mom, you are not wearing underwear". I told her, "I never do. It is more comfortable without them for me." It was a little embarrassing to say the least because it was also the first time she had seen me naked. When she was very young, I could walk around the house naked and did not have to be so cautious. Now it is just us girls around the house. She said that she might try going without underwear, too. I told her that it is her decision, and that she could try it. Am I wrong for letting this happen and being more open?
2006-11-24 06:48:44 · 21 answers · asked by Stephanie W 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Yeah, i will let her go to school without. She can play it by ear when she plays sports. Most girls I do not think will care. When I go to the gym, some women comment and sometimes try it themselves after I tell them how comfortable I am without them.
2006-11-24 06:56:07 · update #1
Thanks to all of your support. I spoke to my daughter today. She has tried going without her panties and really likes it. She gave me a hug today thanking me for helping her find out about this. I am so proud of her. She said that she wants to be more open with me. I think we are going to become so much closer now. I told her that she can borrow my clothes anytime if she needs them, and she told me I could borrow hers if I want. Not sure how I am going to look in Abercrombie or American Eagle jeans?? LOL.... anyway, I wanted to give everyone an update.
2006-11-24 09:21:09 · update #2
The more open you are with her now the better chance you have of her being open with you when she becomes curios about sex and other aspacets of life. My daughter is ten and if we are rushed for time she will jump in the shower with me and she knows al bout what a period is and she even talks to me about sex and why it her last name is different just keep being open and build a beautiful relationship with her while it is stil moldable. If she chooses to go comando well let her she is gonna have to decide sooner or later and wouldn't you like to be a positive in her life rather than her fell like you will just knock her down at every turn?
2006-11-24 07:01:23 · answer #1 · answered by emotionalyhurtmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know to each their own!!! The difference between you and your daughter is age and EXPERIENCE!!!! I don't think it is all that much of a big deal myself, BUT hygiene at her age is really questionable. Not for all girls, but certainly for some. Since you are a nurse you know all about the changes in bacteria that can happen in the vagina, so I would be sure to talk to her about all of this. Maybe she should definitely wear them when she is having her periods.
Is she a fairly confident girl? Because school age kids may give her a hard time for not wearing underwear...you know, when she has to dress down for P.E. or things like that!!!
For what its worth, I don't think you are wrong for this...just be very open with her about all of the risks that may go with this too, both physical and all the adolescent gossip that may come along with it.
2006-11-24 06:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by yidlmama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your choice, and most people won't know, so do what you want to do!!!
But if your daughter plays sports and is in a typical public school, chances are that someone will make fun of her. It's still her decision, but she might want to keep that in mind for her reputation not to be hurt. Things do go around fast.
But it's very good that you are able to talk to her like that- she may be embarrassed, but at least she is learning things like this from her mother, and not other sources... My mom is very open, and while sometimes I think a little too open, I'm glad I can talk to her about anything I want.
2006-11-24 08:21:12 · answer #3 · answered by shivers_42 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is anything wrong with what you did. You are both girls there is nothing wrong with walking around naked b/c you are not doing it sexually. I think that the underwear thing is not gross at all. I am 14 and I found out that my mom doesn't wear them sometimes and doesn't wear them to bed at all. I used to get sore in-between my legs at night that is when my mom told me not to wear them. Now that you have been open about these things with you I think you will be just fine. Me and my mom relationship is actually getting better. Good luck.
2006-11-25 14:40:40 · answer #4 · answered by Prettygurl15 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While it may be OK to go around without underwear (as a male I would never object) your daughter will find out that is NOT acceptable at school and could be disciplined for it. Privacy is still a hot topic and in a public setting I would not encourage her to go without underwear (for many obvious other reasons including the guys around her). Lack of underwear WILL become known in her school, believe me and that could backfire quick. Around the house, let her go naked if she wants. Your home, your rules.
2006-11-24 08:10:36 · answer #5 · answered by snddupree 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Around the house is fine,but I think she really needs to be wearing underwear to school, especially Phys ed!! Can you imagine her embarrasment if the kids at school found out she had no undies on?! My god, big trouble there! Apart from that, I think it's great you can be open and honest with your daughter. I'm quite open with my teenage son, I wish more people could be! GOOD LUCK!
2006-11-25 02:44:43 · answer #6 · answered by melfromhell001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Nicolais S, she is in junior high, and if I could remember, when I was her age, I was required to enroll in gym class or some sort of P.E. class (they do this now to hopefully prevent obessity in teens and children and to keep them healthy!). So then, whenever it was time to go out in the soccer or basketball fields at school, we were required to wear P.E. shorts (black) and a t-shirt and tennis shoes. Sometimes other girls dressed in front of other girls in the locker rooms. Now I hope your daughter will be changing in the bathroom stalls as the other kids will think she's weird, and you don't want to ruin her reputation at school do you?
2006-11-24 09:59:48 · answer #7 · answered by Suzy Suzee Sue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't wear panties either only 4 days out of the month i do for my period but that is it. It is more comfy to be without panties. If she dosen't want to wear them either then that is fine as long as she does not have a skirt on now that calls for underwear.
Nah i don't think you done anything wrong.
2006-11-24 07:27:54 · answer #8 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay so my opinion on this probably doesnt count for much since im 15 but w/e
I really dont think it matters. Why would it? My mom is open with me and that is why i have a good relationship with her. Don't try and hide stupid (no offense) little things like that from her.
2006-11-24 06:53:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't see anything wrong with it I don't think that you were wrong at all I think that people need to be more open with things like that. And if your daughter decides not to wear underwear then that is her choice as well I don't think that there is anything wrong. Kudos to you for being open and honest with your daughter more people need to be like that.
2006-11-24 06:56:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋