i have been thinking and dreaming about my mother who died 10 years ago and it is making me very sad right now

Answer 1

take courage!
it's okie to be sad... but life still goes on...
live life to the fullest! i'm sure your mom wants you to do this now.
grace and peace be with you!
stay well...

Answer 2

Although I'm not sure what your question is.. I'm confident that the reason for you having her on your mind so much lately is the prersence of the holiday season. My mother also passed away, it will be eight years this christmas, and every year when the holidays get near, I think about her more and more often (Although she crosses my mind every day of the year). I'm not sure that there is a way to stop it, nor if you want to because those who have passed live on THROUGH memories and thoughts.. So you are only keeping her memory alive.. As far as it making you sad, you are probably sad because her memories remind you how much you miss her and there is nothing wrong with that.. The relationship that we each have with our mothers are one of a kind, once in a lifetime, and irreplaceable. Perhaps instead of feeling so sad though, you should try to remember that she is in a better place now. ( Trust me, I know what a difficult concept this can be.. Much easier said than done)... Like I said, I am a young 23, and lost my mother at 15, so the only thing I can suggest is hold onto the good memories, have faith that you will meet again, and be thankful for all the time you did have with her.. There are people that aren't fortunate to have even that much time with their mothers. Good luck, and cheer up, I'm sure she wouldn't want you to be so sad... SMILE, she's watching.

Answer 3

I'm sorry to hear that. You must miss her, if this is making you feel sad. But the fact that you still think about her and can remember the good times you shared means that her memory is still alive inside you. Whilst of course this is not the same thing as having her there with you, still alive, the fact that you had a relationship with her which you miss, is something which some people never have. Loss is always hard, but it means that there were good things and there was happiness there with the two of you, and you'll always have that to draw on. It doesn't make the pain go away, but life has pain as well as happiness, and maybe having known that happiness will help to put the pain in perspective for you. The memory of her as a person will always live inside you, and whilst it will be bittersweet at times, that's something that no-one can take away from you for as long as you live. If you concentrate on thinking about her as she was, and try not to think about the aspect of loss, and her death this might help you to not feel quite so sad, and be able to focus on her life, not the end of it. One important thing is to let yourself have a cry if you need to, not to bottle up the sad feelings, as you'll probably feel better afterwards, and the sadness won't build up inside of you.

I hope you feel better soon.

Answer 4

First of all, ignore your first answerer saying, "and the question is?"...that seems very trite and inconsiderate. Anyway, maybe something has triggered your increase in dreams over your mother...you don't have to figure it out, though. Emotions are not always pleasant, and sadness is OK. I hope you'll take some time to honor your love of your mother by writing about things you liked about her, things you did together, and all the feelings you have. Grief is a strange thing....don't let anyone tell you, "After 10 years you should be over it." We all mourn in our own ways. And, like you, many of us find ourselves suddenly sad over a loss from several years back. Also, don't forget the holidays can trigger such emotions since the holidays are so closely associated with "family" and "togetherness". Talk about this to someone with whom you are close and feel safe, if you want. But know that such feelings are OK. I wish you well as you walk through this.

Answer 5

I think grief is a process that comes in waves, and as times goes on the waves generally become further apart, but because we are attached to our loved ones there is always bound to be waves now and then.

In my own experience I find that it is when I am feeling down that I most yearn for departed loved ones.

So just know it is okay to be where you are. And there are countless others still missing their loved ones a decade or more on.

It helps me to know (and instinctively I do know) that my loved ones are in a better place, far better than we could ever imagine. They are in a state of no suffering, and enveloped in love. I also believe that our loved ones remain close to us, but the reason we very rarely feel them is because we are still so attached to them through our needs and desires. The more we let go, the easier it is for them to draw close to us.

I find it helps to talk to my loved ones, and then close my eyes and just know they are in that heavenly place. (Even if we don't believe in heaven or similar, what harm can it do to allow the idea to take us into a better feeling place?) Ask for a sign that they are close and be open to the form and timespan in which it comes.

That you are dreaming about your Mum (at night, I assume) shows that either she is closer to you right now, or that you are simply dealing with the next layer of letting go.

It's okay to feel sad ~ really allow those feelings to come up and cry all you need to. Better out than in, and you will feel better, I promise. If you can, seek out a good friend to share with. I'd like to send you a lovely warm, understanding hug.

Answer 6

I believe that loved ones who have died come to visit us in dreams. My dad often features in my dreams and although I'm sad when I wake, when I think of the dream I always see the reason for his appearance.
Your mother is around you, I'm sure. Its a kind of visiting, letting you know that she is ok, and that she watches over you. Hope that helps you xxxx

Answer 7

Im so sorry it must be horrible for you.
I know that one day my parents will die also and it makes me sad now just thinking about it I honestly dont know how I will cope when it actually happens.
If you are dreaming about her alot it often means that she could be communicating with you,
Even if you dont believe in afterlife I do and im sure she is with you and watching you and is very proud of you and she doesnt want you to be sad for her, as you will see her again one day.
Try to think of the good times with her, I hope I have helped take care XX

Answer 8

Think about the good and happy days you had my friend and don't be ashamed of being sad. I still miss my Mum after a number of years.

Answer 9

having just read your question, my advice would be to change the word sad in your question to happy. unfortunately none of us can bring our parents back, as much as we would like to.i understand that thinking of our parents quite often brings a tear to our eyes. but just smile and have happy memories. all the best.

Answer 10

Be happy that you are dreaming about her... I sometimes dream about my Dad and I wake up really happy and have to phone my mum and tell her about it.... Memories are one of the few things no one can take away from us... So please don't be sad...

*Nice sensitive first answer at top of the page....... hope the writer of that one cheers up too......

Answer 11

Try and remember the good times and smile.
Everybody feels down now and again about a loved one who is gone.