my husbands exwife who he has a young child with is making my life a living hell.she hates the fact that i married her husband and has a great relationship with her son.she bad mouths me to my inlaws to start trouble,does not allow me to have any contact with the school or the sons friends.i'm not allowed to watch "ken" when my husbands not home.i have never given her a reason to not trust me or said anything bad about her in front of ken.the worst part is my husband will not stand up for me and allows her to do this.he said he can't control what she does which is true but he is constantly helping her out like giving her extra money,watching ken when its not his day so she can go out and the list goes on.this upsets me the most when my husband accomidates her when he does not have to.i understand he wants to keep peace for kens sake but should his ex wife have so much control over our lives and say and do whatever she wants and my husband just ignores it?should i just let it go?
2006-11-24 01:58:36 · 9 answers · asked by marymackey08 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
He obviously doesn't get how this is making you feel. I say wake up and step out of this nightmare.
2006-11-24 02:01:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you can never WATCH your on child. He's not a babysitter he's a father. If his ex goes out then she should call Ken's father. He should have his son (even on days that are not part of the schedule). So you are going to have to get over that because he's the father. Secondly, why do you want to go up to his school or contact Ken's friends? You are the step-mom not the parent. It's not your job to go up to the school. That's what his mom and dad are there for.
Now as far as you not watching Ken is totally up to your husband. He is just as much a parent as the mother. If you are the babysitter for your husband then the ex shouldn't have a problem with it. It is none of her business who keeps Ken when he's in your husbands care. As long as you are harmful to Ken then you should be allow to be alone with him. The ex has no right to say anything about that. You first need to find out why it is that your husband doesn't leave you alone with Ken. Maybe he doesn't trust you to be alone with Ken. Take that problem up with your husband. The ex doesn't have a say in that matter.
Who cares what the ex says about you? You have the husband so don't worry so much. Don't put anymore energy into the situation. The more you care about the ex the more she'll be able to get to you.
2006-11-24 02:15:23 · answer #2 · answered by Inez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This stinks for each individual in contact. It sounds like your husband is in basic terms attempting to maintain the peace yet I understand why you're disillusioned. are you able to purpose to communicate on your husband approximately your emotions and probably set some floor regulations? The ex-spouse is in all probability in basic terms harm and needs to harm your husband. i'm not asserting it somewhat is right yet perhaps in basic terms think of on the subject of ways you may experience in case you have been in her shoes. Then from right here perhaps you could think of of a few issues which you would be keen to enable her have her way approximately and then use that as a bartering device mutually with your husband. tell him seem i'm keen to enable her proceed to do A, B and C yet i'm unable to tolerate D, E and F. in case you do it this type then he's conscious you're attempting to do the final you could to make this undesirable concern a sprint greater advantageous yet he additionally will understand which you at the instant are not keen to sit down down back and enable her walk throughout you. solid success with each thing.
2016-10-13 00:44:46 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, don't ignore it. Your husband needs to support you and respect your feelings and views first, not his ex-wife's. Talk to him--calmly. Explain your feelings and the consequences of his behavior (non-threatening) reguarding the whole situation. If he can't/won't change, then you made a mistake in judgement in marrying him and need to consider your options.
2006-11-24 02:04:47 · answer #4 · answered by getting2old2quick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you let it go a bad situation will only become worse
the three of you should get together and work out a schedule for the child that works for you but most importantly him and dont deviate from it
2006-11-24 02:04:31 · answer #5 · answered by ranger_girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's jealous. I've been there, I know. Give it time. Don't let her split you up or she's won. Key thing to remember is that you're not mom, so don't step in too quickly. Just give it time. Once she finds someone for herself her pre-occupation with you will fade. Don't try to explain anything as you have nothing to explain. It'll fall on deaf ears. Don't worry about your in-laws. Let them see for themselves who you really are.
Don't give up on it just yet. Trust me. If it gets unbearable, ask her if she wants to have a three-way. That'll shut her up!!!! Good luck!!
2006-11-24 02:04:25 · answer #6 · answered by Jim C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U seem to be extremely sensitive and self conscious. Please be patient and take things as they come by u. Donot be in a hurry and do not make an issue more so with ur husband.
2006-11-24 02:03:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You knew about this situation when you married him! He has big obligations to his first family!
2006-11-24 02:03:00 · answer #8 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey u know why a divorce cost so much?.................its worth every cent
2006-11-24 02:02:18 · answer #9 · answered by southern65 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋