she has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for about 5 months.last week they were caught drinking at one of their friends houses.he was really drunk and she was quite well on herself.do you think i'm right to consider putting on the pill or do you think i would be giving her a free ticket to have sex.whats worse?
2006-11-24 01:18:51 · 38 answers · asked by milopoo2 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I don't know if I'd call 5 months steady...
Anyway, I've read the other posts, and it's really getting blown out of proportion. She doesn't sound like an alcoholic, and you certainly don't sound like a bad parent because she was caught drinking. She sounds like a typical 15 year old. I was pretty much the same way (you'd be surprised how much alcohol some parents leave in the house thinking their kids won't touch it).
You could put her on the Pill, or just get her a box of condoms. If she's able to stick with someone for more than 2 weeks at 15, she's probably sensible enough to use either one. When I was 15, my boyfriend's dad did the same thing. It was really awkward and weird, but it ended up being really helpful, because we did use them, and he had peace of mind because he knew his son wasn't going to end up doing something stupid.
Definitely have a talk with her though. If she hasn't had sex already she's probably been planning on it. Kids don't need parents' permission to have sex, they're going to do it anyway. Giving her access to any form of protection is better than doing nothing and HOPING she'll be a good girl.
2006-11-24 02:59:39 · answer #1 · answered by o0_ithilwen_0o 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 16 and I have been in a serious relationship with my boyfriend since I was 14. I have NEVER done anything like that! My mom would have whoopd my a**, but anyway, I think you should talk to her 1st explain the consequences of sex @ a young age, ask her 2 b honest with u and ask her if she has already had sex. If u r that worried then talk to her about being on the pill. This may very well condone sex, but if she is having sex you don't want her to get pregnant. Also take her to a doctor to get some factual info. You are in a tough situation. I hope it all works out 4 you
God bless
2006-11-24 11:14:42 · answer #2 · answered by Just Dance 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 15 as well and my boyfriend is 17.. we have been together for almost 3 months. I think it would be wise to ask your daughter if she wants to go on the pill... but stress that you don't want her having sex at this age. My boyfriend and I had sex last month and my parents found out. There are worse things than having to have an uncomfortable talk with your daughter. Tell her that even on the pill if you use a condom there is still a risk of getting pregnant. It is NOT something a 15 year old girl wants to worry about... it's better if she does not have sex at all. you are being a responsible parent by not avoiding the subject all together however. remember that she is still a good kid despite everything... and that everyone makes mistakes.
2006-11-24 01:33:40 · answer #3 · answered by Lauren 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My daughter is 17 and came to me at 15 when she became active. I would suggest that you do put her on the pill. The teen years are a rough go for every parent and child... try to keep the communication lines open with her and don't judge her to harshly. They all mess up and do "stupid" things... its part of becoming an adult but, at least you can head off any problems later on down the road. Remind her that the pill doesnt stop STD's and to use a condom. Also remind her that the condom doesnt stop HPV and she is possibly making a lifetime choice by engaging in premarital sex. For those that judge you as a parent for wanting to put your daughter on the pill and encourage safe sex are those that either A) dont have children or B) have no idea what their children are really doing.
2006-11-24 01:37:43 · answer #4 · answered by Amy R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down and have a long talk. Explain that the pill is available if she is having or even thinking about having sex. Tell her you want her to be safe when she decides to have sex, even if she feels that she isn't ready for it yet.
It is better for her to be on the pill (even if "just in case") than for her to get pregnant when the time comes that she feels they are ready.
Make sure she understands in no uncertain terms that you are not giving her a green light to have sex and that she should still wait for the "one" before having sex.
Also, that condoms should ALWAYS be used in addition to the pill, No matter what.
I was in a long term relationship at 13 years old and got pregnant at 15. So, I am very much for putting her on the pill before she ends up pregnant. No teen thinks it will happen to them.
I got lucky and the father and I stayed together and eventually got married, but I know alot of girls who weren't so lucky and ended up single moms.
Good Luck!
2006-11-24 01:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by Jen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if she is responsible enough to be in a proper relationship then the pill will be fine. She's gonna do it anyway (if she already hasen't) my mum put me on the pill at 15. I had been with my boyf for 2 yrs (of course we had done it before) we stayed together for another 5. and we didn't go at it like rabbits. It's not a free ticket to have sex, she already has that. She can go to a doctor and get the pill and condoms. she would probably feel more at ease if you took her to a doctor and knew about it. I think you should. Kids have sex younger and younger these days, as they are more mature mentally.
2006-11-24 01:26:08 · answer #6 · answered by fel t 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should put her on the pill its not giving her a free ticket.
Its good that you accept the fact that she may be having sex and not just going crazy and keeping her under lock and key. If your daughter is gonna have sex then nothing you say will change that
but you can help prevebt pregnancy.
As for all the coments about her drinking i dont know why people are acting so shocked its normal and its what nearly all teenagers are doing. At least you have got your eyes open and accept that youe daughter is growing up.
2006-11-24 02:27:10 · answer #7 · answered by D900 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your FIRST concern should be the fact that your 15 year old is getting drunk. I hope it phases you that this could be a warning sign of alcholoism. I know you cannot be with your kids 24/7 and i know that teens are going to do what they do even if it is being sneaky, but I would strongly advise you get her into a program, or at least some family counseling. As for the "pill" well, if your daughter is out drinking it up, what makes you think that she is responsible to handle birth control. As a parent myself, I would NOT buy the bullets for the game of RR that kids play with sex. Being on the pill (which I am strongly against in the first place) does not protect against STDs or HIV.
2006-11-24 01:31:19 · answer #8 · answered by newcovenant0 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You will be irresponsible if you do nothing. Not just putting her on the pill but also sitting down and having a good talk to her about safe sex and using condoms. It is inevitable that she will have sex at some point best for her to be prepared. I don't think you should look at it as encouragement just being sensible and realistic and an understanding modern parent. I speak as the parent myself of a 16 year old daughter.
2006-11-24 01:27:01 · answer #9 · answered by ANON 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a single dad of two girls
Firstly she doesnt need to the pill to stop her drinking, and teenagers do that from about 12 now, and even if you think they arent .. they are
If you had any concerns at all she should be on the pill already
Both my girls went on at 14, and both to my knowledge have been quite responsible..well the eldest is 21 and she hasnt got pregnant yet
It is better to do the resposible thing as a parent , and if you dont good luck with sorting it out after the event
2006-11-24 01:25:04 · answer #10 · answered by greydays 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋