Lately, I have been obsessed with something that happened more than ten years ago. This isn't the first time. different incidents but same irrational thought patterns.
ten years ago, while in college, i was in a nightclub. a classmate of mine was also there. we don't like each other. i was in a good mood and tried to make peace. i offered my hand in a handshake. he refused to shake my hand.
at the time, i was in a good mood so i kind of laughed it off and walked away. i keep thinking i should've done something. this was the last time i saw the guy.
now, i keep thinking i should've punched the guy, spit on the guy, or throw my drink in his face.
i have been losing sleep over this.
what is wrong with me? how do i stop thinking about this?
2006-11-22 22:40:12 · 4 answers · asked by anthony l 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sometimes we do not stand up on certain occasions and coming back to these incidences brings back all the frustration and negative feelings that were associated with that event.
Try to understand that this event is in the past and should remain there. There is nothing you can do about it but let it go.
You acted the way you did because your logic came first instead of your emotions and that is a good thing. Punching, spitting and doing other horrible things to another person may seem appealing in the beginning but then the consequences are probably not fun!!!
You should be proud of yourself for ignoring your "friend's" bad attitude and doing the wise thing!
2006-11-22 22:49:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have any regrets. It only matters what "we" do as people. You did the right thing by offering to shake his hand and put whatever the problem between the two of u was and he refused it, so u did all u could do. We are only responible for how we treat people in our lives and our own actions. He would look like the idiot to people, not u. I wouldn't waste 2 mins thought on this situation. Treat people the best u can and know u are the bigger person.
2006-11-23 02:25:02 · answer #2 · answered by Amber 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ranger_girl's got it spot on. I do that too and it's very frustrating but the only thing you really can do is say to yourself "It's in the past, i can't change it." I agree with with ranger_girl on the second part too. It may seem appealing to bash his face in with an iron pipe but I doubt it'd come back to you in a good way.
2006-11-22 23:20:24 · answer #3 · answered by David H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of it this way. He was at the time in an unhappy place while you were in a more happy state of mind. By not shaking your hands, he has revealed that he is the more pathetic one , not you. Don't obsess about it anymore. Don't allow him to occupy your head rent-free!!!
2006-11-23 01:16:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋