Am I too young to be thinking about marriage?

Question

I'm 22 (23 early next year) and have been with my partner for over 6 years. We bought our first place together almost a year ago. Things are great between us (well 99% of the time!) and recently I've been thinking a lot about getting married to him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him but are we too young to be thinking about marriage?

He's happy to do it! In fact, he mentioned he was looking at engagement rings the other day! We're the same age!

Answer 1

No one is too young or old to think about marriage---the real question is whether you are both willing and ready to make the kind of commitment to each other that a lasting marriage needs.
You need to seriously talk to your partner about what the both of you want and expect of each other in marriage---do you both want a family?---Will you both be working?---Can you work together to solve problems and overcome difficulties that may come up? Are you both mature enough to be your own selves as well as a couple?
Have you seen each other through illness, injury, stress and disagreements and come out stronger because of your love for each other? Can you forgive each other if you cause each other sadness or pain? Can you put up with each other's bad habits or personal quirks? Can you make each other laugh? Can you live together while retaining your personal space when you need or want it? Can you share your life and respect each other's differences? Can you be intimate without sex, if you want to be?
These are just a few things you can talk over; there are lots more you can think of while you're talking.
Don't be afraid to talk to each other, don't be afraid to wait if either of you has doubts or needs to think about it some more.
Marriage isn't a goal. It's a shared journey. It can be as joyful, or painful, as fulfilling or as boring as the two of you make it. It's a work continually in progress, and everybody has to work at it to make it work.
Whatever you decide to do, I wish you happiness, peace, and continuing love together.

Answer 2

Since I don't know you or your husband I have no idea whether your marriage will last. HOWEVER, the statistics are against you. People who get married that young usually haven't lived long enough to understand the real world and what a relationship takes to last. At 18, you were still a child (legally an adult, but your brain wasn't done developing). Getting married that young and then having children means you probably will not get the education you need in today's world to be financially stable. At your age you think that all a marriage needs is love - that's not the case. Marriage is hard, hard work and is made even harder by children, especially if you don't have the financial backing to take care of yourselves. Again, I don't know you, but I don't think young marriages have a very good chance at lasting. I am 23 and have been married for three months. However, my husband and I both have college degrees, have full-time jobs and were financially independent of each other and our parents before we got married.

Answer 3

No, under the circumstances you aren't. It shows that you are mature enough, you can take care of yourself and another person. You've basically been living as a married couple for over a year now. Seems to me that you are committed to each other as well. 6 years is not a short time. Why don't you get married? Has he said anything about it? Do you think he would be against the idea? I'm only asking about the 2 of you as that's all that matters and no one else.

If you love him, then get married and be happy. You deserve it.

Answer 4

How to Succeed in Marriage :
- Are You Thinking About Marriage?
- What Is Needed for a Successful Marriage?
http://watchtower.org/library/w/1999/2/15/article_01.htm

The Wedding Day---Making It a Joyful Beginning :
- "The Happiest Day of Our Lives"
- The Wedding Day--Happy but Demanding
- A Sample Preparations Checklist
- Marriage Should Be a Permanent Bond
http://watchtower.org/library/g/2002/2/8/article_01.htm

Answer 5

No! You've been together a long time and have lived with each other to have discovered bad habits! You know your own relationship and if you both feel the same, go for it! I got married 5 years ago when I was 24. I know people who've been married since they were 18 and are still together 60 years later and I also know people who got married in their 40's and they've broken up quite quickly! Basically it's about the relationship, not the age! Enjoy and good luck for your future!XXX

Answer 6

I was already married and had my first son at your age. Brett is now 5 1/2 years old and I have been married for 7 years. Still happy, but sometimes I wonder what if I had lived MY life first for a little while. (Then I remember what it was like living with my mom and I realize I did what was best with me and my circumstances!)

While getting married is official, to me it looks like you guys have already done made the commitment by buying a house and staying together for over 6 years.

Answer 7

Well done for making such a commitment. I was also thinking of getting married until recently. I'm 22 and would recommend that you think strongly about it. Are you working? Or at Uni? Where do you see your life going? All of these questions are important, think about long term, having children, careers, families, as well as looking at your background, are your values similar or totally different? My upbringing was different to my partners, we split up because of it. 22/23 is not too young, but what are your maturity levels, and how old is your partner? What does he think of marriage?

Answer 8

Well if you feel mentally prepared for it then yes. I'm also 22 and will be 23 beginning of next year but I definitely don't feel ready for marriage. It's different for everyone. You feel you're ready for marriage but what about your partner? Has he discussed marriage with you? It has to be a mutual decision when it comes to marriage... So be sure that your partner also wants the same...good luck and best wishes.....

Answer 9

you haven't rushed in to it- so it should work out. Just realise though that you can change as a person from 22 to 30, so what might seem right now may not be right in 5 years time. But 6 years together suggests you are right for each other.

Answer 10

If you've been together for 6 years, I think it's probably a great idea!!! I just salvaged my marriage of a year and a half. We almost divorced and had been away from each other for 3 months. I'm 37, she's 28. If we can do it, you can fur sure!!! Good luck!!!

Happy Turkey Day!!

TT