What's wrong? My wife and I are having sex less and less over past few months.?

Question

My wife works long hours. I understand that she can be tired. Additionally, there has been a ownership change at her company which is causing her additional stress. BUT, she disapears from time to time and I can not reach her by cell phone. She doesn't listen to her voice messages on her cell phone. She gets mad over the smallest of things and refuses to talk for days. She sleeps on top of the covers as opposed to getting under them with me which hinders my efforts to make love to her. She tells me she needs to talk to me but never does. She only does small talk , she doesn't share her true feelings. Am I being paranoid? Or is she seeing someone else?

Answer 1

You are not being paraniod. You love your wife, but she is not showing her love back, it's perfectly normal to think she is seeing someone else.

Talk to her, sometimes people just get so tired that they just can't handle things anymore. From what is sounds though, you probably won't get a chance to talk to your wife until she gets some rest. Try and plan a vacation where she can sleep and have some rest. After she seems well rested and a bit more awake, then try and make love to her again. If she won't talk or afterward making love, set up a time for your talk, your real talk. Don't accuse her of cheating, that will make it worse. Tell her you want to understand. Share your feelings. Ask her if you are doing anything wrong, and if there is anything you can do for her (housework *wink wink*. If she still doesn't open up, suggest counciling.

Answer 2

This sounds familiar, because I've been there. Long hours, not talking, her sleeping and sex life changing... Is everything else in your marriage ok? Is there a lot of stress? COuld it be said that you might be going through the motions a bit? Feel disconnected from each other? If any of these things are the case and she's changed her schedule in more than one way, chances are you have bigger problems. Keep track of her email if you can, cell phone records and if you have to... show up unannounced to work with dinner or some excuse like that to make sure she is where she says she is. Don't let her know you suspect something until you have proof, just to be certain. I'm sorry. Good luck.

Answer 3

Being overly stressed and overly tired like your wife is can kill any sexual feelings a person could have. It doesn't look like there is any cheating involved.

What she needs is a vacation so that the two of you can catch up on your romance and she can get some recovery time. Or, she should get another job that's less stressful and less tiring for her.

Try to have a discussion with her at a long free moment. Communication is best here. Or get counseling for the both of you to help you work out the problems.

Good luck. :)

Answer 4

I feel so badly for you and can certainly relate. Talking is an absolute must - to see what is going on in her mind. Ask her how she feels about counseling if she's open to it than at least you know that there is some hope. As for is she seeing someone....I am a woman that did do that with my first husband (young & foolish I was & certainly learned from that) I hate to say it but... you may not be just paranoid... I really hope that things will work out for you

Answer 5

I doubt she's seeing someone else. She's probably just exhausted from work and she probably sleeps on top of the covers to avoid you initiating sex with her, she probably does that so she doesn't hurt your feelings. Best thing I can tell you is to make sure you go out of your way to help her. Maybe you can cook dinner for her one night and set the table real nice and maybe even get her a small sweet gift, to make the night really special (just don't make her do the dishes). I think that'll help you and her and make her feel really good. Good luck! You do sound like a good guy!

Answer 6

Wow, this sounds familiar. When I'm stressed out and exhausted like that, the last thing I want is to have sex. He's a wonderful man and I adore him, but I can barely stay awake to get the kids to bed. I feel guilty turning him down, especially when he gets upset, which puts more stress on me. I also have medical problems that makes sex painful. It is a deterrent and does make me less interested in being with him. You really should initiate the conversation instead of waiting for her to do it. She obviously wants to confide in you, but something is holding her back.

Answer 7

If the lack of ability of intercourse has handed off in general/in basic terms throughout the time of and after the being pregnant then purely supply her a while to recuperate and 'guard your self' for a jointly as (in case you recognize what I mean). It takes a minimum of four weeks on your physique to totally recover from a c-area. it may desire to look like a small scar out of your attitude yet a c-area cuts via 7 layers of her physique, beginning with the exterior (the layer you're seeing) and ending with the uterus. I had muscular pains for weeks after my c-area and that i nonetheless remember this 10 years on. I doubt that it has something to do inclusive of your visual charm and extra to do inclusive of your behaviour and her tiredness of coping with a newborn. is this her first newborn? do no longer study her to a diverse woman, each and every person is diverse and that's beside the point on your issue in any case. i think of in case you strengthen the full intercourse element together with her now it is going to initiate a controversy, she's probably drained from being up all night with the toddler, and is she additionally doing each and all the toddler care and homestead projects? maybe she resents you for no longer doing extra to assist her? additionally, how are her thoughts in the direction of existence frequently? could desire to she be affected by positioned up-natal blues? If she is depressed her libido will shrink. do you recognize what i think of is the final thank you to re-ignite the intercourse? a million. permit her get some relax, grant to stay conscious nights with the toddler (or get a babysitter like your/her Mum to assist). 2. sparkling the homestead, tell her to place her ft up for the day and tell her she's doing a great activity as a mom. Ask her how she feels approximately motherhood. (If she is unhappy/depressed she could have the toddler blues). 3. Assuming she isn't drained or depressed, cope together with her to a special occasion/night. If she would not prefer to leave the toddler with a babysitter you grants her a special occasion (like a date), at homestead, make her her general meal (or her general takeway in case you could no longer cook dinner), hire a action picture, popcorn, candies and an exceedingly good bunch of flora (no longer the $5 servo form). 4. After your date, tell her how beautiful she is, and how she seems purely as beautiful because of the fact the day you met her. 5. initiate with a back rub down, then tell her 'permit's flow to mattress so as that i will rub down you correct'. 6. Use somewhat some foreplay.

Answer 8

I too am a wife with with many stresses and problems that make me so very tired at night. I crawl into the bed too tired to snuggle, much less make love.

I have another problem, perhaps your wife has something similiar? Not only am I utterly exhausted, sex has become painful. To the point that I can barely breathe, rather than attempt it and long for it just to be over... I avoid it as well. Partly due to the fact that my husband is a good 150 pounds heavier than when we married, ....
Perhaps there is a physical reason your wife is avoiding sex and she is too embarrased/ afraid to tell you??

Answer 9

Yours is a very tricky situation.

Look,your wife isnt seeing someone else.She is just tired and stressed out.

Try to shower her with your feelings,she is being selfish,but its just you who can help her to get out of that and open herself to you,isnt it ???

She needs some time,and after that quality time i am sure she will the same old wife,you loved.
Dont try to give up your effort to woe her and dont leave her alone,she may take that wrong.
Always be there for her,she will definitley realize her mistake and will love you for that.

Just chill man,she is yours and will be yours.

Answer 10

Don't wait for her to start the talk, u must talk to her on the matter as soon as possilbe. Do it by these 2 days.
She might be very stressed out by her new boss. If you let these get longer it will affect your relationship. A frank and honest talk will help to clear any misunderstanding. All the best.