My mother-in-law treats my husband terribly, stated in a letter to me that she hates me, verbally told husband she hates me, pampers husband's younger brother who happens to be an alcoholic, and can go months without seeing her grandchildren of whom she verbally disrespects as well. I am ready for a divorce as husband has recently changed as a result of mother's abuse. He verbally admits his mom is "crazy" and drives him nuts, but he does not acknowledge his own changes as a result of her... We have been married 15-1/2 years, the other three parents (both of mine and his father) died over 10 + years ago so she is the only living grandparent for our children... She only cares for herself.. I have tried and tried and tried to incorporate her into their lives but she has always remained limited and on her terms as to when she sees them... I realized she was perhaps "mentally ill" when my father-in-law died 1993 (her husband) and she was relieved and stated such...
2006-11-22 15:47:48 · 12 answers · asked by EL 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My best advice to you, sincerely, it to go speak with someone professional. And drag your husband with too. How does she treat your children? If she is bad to them in any way, then put your foot down. It is one thing for us to deal with someone whom is possible mentally ill, but don't make your kids deal with it!
2006-11-22 15:52:38 · answer #1 · answered by mich 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
And yet you married her son...If she is such a horrible person why did you marry her son? Did you really expect her to change at all. She doesn't want to be in her grandkid's lives. That is HER choice to make not your's. As for your husband, how do you know that all of the changes he is going through are as a result of his mother? People change as they age, some for the better some not. Some married couples actually "outgrow" each other. But really, you have nothing to whine about, if things were so bad why did YOU stay in the first place?
2006-11-22 15:58:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remind your mother in law he is single and if she likes him so much she should live with him. Your color is in your genes. Doesn't make the blood any different. Two white acquittance that did not like blacks. First one found out from his family tree he was part black. He made a BIG deal about two things at work. How much he hated blacks and his family was working on their family tree. He use to pick on one guy that was part Russian and part Mexican. Yes we harassed him for awhile after we found out. Second guy was married to white girl. both had blue eyes and blond hair. My friend liked the girl before she was married and never dated because he liked her too much. One day the baby came. Black. Not dark brown but black. Husband was mad. Said she cheated. Family tree was run and both had black in their family tree. He more then her. He left her even though they checked and it was both of their child. she didn't cheat. My friend ended up with her. Be care full what you say about your child it may happen to you but be white. Be a good dad to the children you two have now. Good father to the ones you are going to have. Do not show favoritism. Your wife is with you not him. Who cares what other people say that are not paying your rent. You have done some thing Michael couldn't do. You are still alive. Enjoy each day. Do you ever go to the pier? There is always crabs out there. They climb on the others trying to get ahead and out from where they are. Your step Mom is a crab. Do not let any thing she says bother you in any way. She is your wife's mom so you have to be polite.The nicer you are to her the more it well bother her. Good Luck
2016-03-29 06:17:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand where you are coming from. I have the pretty much the same problem with my mother-in-law. What I have learned is that I cannot change her or my husband, as much as I would like too. I have a great mom who is a wonderful grandmother, so it doesn't bother me so much that my monster in law refuses to acknowledge her grandchildren. All you can really do is love your children, love them enough to equal the love of a mother and a grandmother. It can be done, and your children will be thankful to you for it when they grow up. I would seriously consider getting into counseling for yourself and you husband. His mother is not worth loosing your marriage over. I am sure that she is not making him feel like a worth while dad. You need to make sure that he knows, how much you want him to be around for your kids. That is assuming that you do. I would assume that the kids do need him. Well, I wish you much happiness and luck. I hoped this helped a little. This is a big problem that really needs to be addressed by a professional in person. Best of luck to you.
2006-11-22 16:03:14 · answer #4 · answered by Jeanne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
shes obviously bitter about getting the bad end of the stick in life. Your husband is a drown man, he needs to throw his mother off his back.
2006-11-22 15:52:08 · answer #5 · answered by woah 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow, it's amazing how we seem to have the same mother-in-law, of couse we call them outlaws her, & should be against the law to have in many cases...
it tokk mine 24 yrs to get ruin my marriage, but she brainwashed her baby boy, & now he's all hers, she's my ex in law,this year..
they're crazy for sure...he gets her insanity all to himself...
you don't even know how this is so my story too..
I feel for you, but at least you see it, I denied it till the past 4 yrs ago...but , I'm free of both the mentally ill now..
get it together, he's mamas boy first, last...
sad but true...stand tall...save yourself...they're hopeless
2006-11-22 16:04:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeh, she's nuts. Tell your husband to tell her to butt out of your lives. It's better that the kids have NO grandparents than to have one like her.
If your husband has any balls, he should tell her off.
If that don't work, divorce is inevitable.
2006-11-22 15:52:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mother in law hates her self!
2006-11-22 15:53:31 · answer #8 · answered by Faerie loue 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are normal and she's crazy, she is aware of this. That may be why she hates you. She is jealous. Don't let her worry you.
You don't show enough drama for this woman. She can't compete with your normalcy.
2006-11-22 15:58:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband to grow a pair and use them. He should tell his mother to respect his family and his wife or stay away.
2006-11-22 15:51:24 · answer #10 · answered by d b 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋