a good friend of mine died at age 19 in a car accident over a year ago. When I heard about it i didnt cry and even when I saw his brother (another good friend of mine) i didnt cry. I only cried at his funeral when I saw all my friends crying. But now, a year later, its like every time I see a picture of him or think of him or see his brother or hear the song they played at his funeral I get really sad and I start crying. Why is it just affecting me now??
2006-11-22 14:16:45 · 27 answers · asked by Lissa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Sometimes reality doesn't check in until later. There isn't anything wrong with you. It's kind of like working out at the gym and then getting stiff like a week later.
2006-11-22 14:19:26 · answer #1 · answered by lightsandaction 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hun I dont think there is anything wrong with you, people grieve in different ways and yours was just delayed because you probably felt you had to be the strong person for your friends and his family its just hitting you that he is gone and you wont see him for a long time, It is possible also that you just made it seem like he took a long trip somewhere and that he would be back soon and it is reality is just hitting you either way let yourself grieve and talk to your friends or better yet his brother. Heres a litttle tip that might help ( this is what I did when my friend got killed in a car accident) try writing a letter to your friend that has died and tell them all the things you wanted to tell them before he passed after your done writing it just tuck it away somewhere and when your feeling down read it to yourself and know that he was watching over you while you were writing it and knows everything you wanted and needed to tell him. Know that he is now a gaurdian angel over you and you will see him again one day!!! Mostly I am sorry for your loss as it is one of the hardest things you will go through. I hope this helps and relieves some of the pressure. Just remember there is NOTHING wrong with you!!!!
2006-11-22 22:24:53 · answer #2 · answered by mikeysbaby421 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, i can't say much about the death, but in people's memory, things will never be forgotten, it's just that we don't recall it, slowly, it will still come back out, maybe at the funeral, you are much too shocked and you don't even know it, now the shock is over and you have your own free will, you are recalling it and it is making you thinking about them again.. that is called your feeling towards them, your intimate and relationship and friendship to them.. you kept on recalling and seeing them in your mind, your brain is calling out all the memories of what you had done with them, talk to those friends of your's that had cried with you in the funeral.. recall the things you see, tell them, and cry out loud, let your feelings out..
2006-11-22 22:30:50 · answer #3 · answered by teri_lqy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You haven't dealt much with death... Or maybe you have and this is your way of reacting. At first it wasn't real for you and now when you see the pictures or hear the music, now, a time when you probably have people in your life that are very close and you subconciously think of them and possibly losing them and you feel sad. Don't think to hard. Let your emotions run free!
2006-11-22 22:20:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who says there is anything wrong with you? When my mother died, almost five years ago, my brother never shed a tear. It didnt mean he was happy to see her go or that he was cold-hearted or anything. He just isn't a person inclined to crying.
As for you, it might just be that you needed time to adjust to the idea of your friend not being there anymore before your mind would let you begin to mourn.
2006-11-22 22:22:48 · answer #5 · answered by Dame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A psychologist could give you a better answer but everyone is different. Everyone grieves or mourns in a different way. Sometimes, the shock of the death of a friend or loved one can make you numb rather than simply sad.
Again, you might want to discuss it with a psychologist.
2006-11-22 22:22:07 · answer #6 · answered by KenLG 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because you never let your grief get through you before..
don't worry it's normal..
5 stages of grief
* 1. Denial and Isolation.
* 2. Anger.
* 3. Bargaining.
* 4. Depression.
* 5. Acceptance.
the mere fact that you feel sad just now may state that you haven't accepted the reality yet...
it's ok to cry sometimes you know...
2006-11-22 22:23:14 · answer #7 · answered by ahnnah.reynoso 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has a different way of expressing grief, so there really is nothing wrong with you. But I would like to offer you my deepest sympathies and condolences to you all the same. You will get over this, just give yourself plenty of time.
2006-11-22 22:22:03 · answer #8 · answered by Mike M. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone grieves in their own way and time. Think of all the good things you remember about your friend and go ahead and cry. Crying is good for the soul.
2006-11-22 22:19:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it was the same with me after my mom died. i know it sounds crazy, but i didnt grieve and cry a whole lot after it happened, now i cry at least several times a week, sometimes every day
2006-11-22 23:17:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋