husband of 7 years, continually flirting with other women via SMS on mobile phone, as no sex involved he thinks hes not doing anything wrong, gets a bit close to home when its one of my girlfriends.
2006-11-22 11:28:10 · 44 answers · asked by busy lizy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Explain to him that it is a form of cheating because the intent is there - whether or not he actualises it in a physical form, he's emotionally speaking - having flings with a whole bunch of women. If he loves you then you should be able to sit him down and explain that your response to his behaviour is to withdraw emotionally and physically and thus it is beginning to have a detrimental effect on his marriage. He may well end up sleeping on the couch permanently!!!!
2006-11-22 11:35:47 · answer #1 · answered by Kble 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Has he been flirting for 7 years? If so, then it is just a character trait of his and he most likely means nothing by it. I have been told that I am a flirt and I can assure you, i have never intentionally flirted with anyone, in fact when I try to flirt, it usually is disasterous. So if he's been doing all along, then it is just a part of his fabric. So you have to accept it, or not. If not, leave him and tell him why. If you are going to accept it, then accept it with humor and in get in on the flirting yourself.
Has he just started this flirting in the recent past? Then if there is no sex now, there will be soon. He is testing the waters. It may be innocent now, but it will not stay that way long. One day, someone will flirt back in such a way that tells him its safe and she is willing to be his on the side and she'll never tell you, etc. and he will take her up on it. If he's been flirting for say half the time of your marriage, its because he has been entertaining the idea of cheating and hasn't had the guts to do it. That situation again will eventually turn into infidelity. One day, one woman will make him feel brave enough to do it.
I hope it works out for you.
2006-11-22 11:46:21 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
...If your man is flirting with other women whether it be on phone,Internet or in person, he is being disrespectful of you.Especially if you are aware of it...BEWARE!!! He probably is doing more than flirting and goes by the old saying " The best place to hide something is right under someones nose"...think about that very carefully. I have been having an affair with a married man myself for several years. It started out with flirting and everyone even his wife knew about it. He flirts all the time with any woman he can and I know he will have sex with any of them if he can. If he knows the woman would not snitch on him and can keep a straight face in front of his wife, she's a prime target. I know all my lover's family, friends and have even gone on trips and parties with them. We have held hands and cuddled and he has given me massages in front of them but he always tells them that's just his personality, he just a fun loving guy!...I have no illusions our relationship, it's just just a very weird friendship with benefits. AND I'm not stupid enough to think he doesn't cheat on me but I could care less, we have fun and if his woman is naive enough to believe him, oh well...by the way, we do practice safe sex for both our healths. I know it's hard to leave someone after 7 years ever more do if there are children involved but you should seriously consider it for your own self respect if nothing else. At the very least get both individual and joint counseling...you're going to need all the help you can get to work on this issue...Good Luck!
2006-11-22 12:00:17 · answer #3 · answered by jesshispet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure he knows your girlfriends are off limits to him, he can't flirt or anything else with them. but the other flirting you should tell him it bothers you and tell him if the shoe was on the other foot would he want you to flirt with other men. I have a very attractive husband and women flirt with him all the time and sometimes they don't care if i'm standing right there,he smiles and have conversations with them (flirt back) when it gets carried away he lets them know that he is happily married , his flirting used to bother me but i trust my husband and he respects me and i know i have nothing to worry about we made a promise to each other before we got married that if anything comes up that would make the other one even think of cheating we would talk it out or decide to break up before we would cheat. we both came from relationships where we were faithful to cheaters so we know how it feels and don't want to go through that anymore.
2006-11-22 12:00:43 · answer #4 · answered by spagetti7 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him that:
A good marriage is an intimate and loving relationship which gives both partners security, friendship, companionship, support, comfort, and deep love that penetrates every aspect of life. None of this can be achieved without work and sacrifice.
Marriage may be compared to a plant that requires daily nurture, daily attention, daily care and cultivation. It will not develop of its own accord; only as effort and will are exerted will it grow and mature. For a marriage to succeed, both husband and wife must be committed to its success. They must build an enduring love relationship that is centered in the heart of their consciousness. Their relationship must be nurtured with the water of loyalty and love.
2006-11-22 12:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You first of all need to check that friend of yours and let her know you don't appreciate her talking to your husband that way. And if she thinks you are over reacting then dump her as a friend. As for your husband he needs to chill, I know it is flirting but it is not right he is married and needs to realize that you don't appreciate it. If you two can't come to some agreement then it is time to find some friends of your own and do the same thing and see how he reacts. I mean two can play the same game.
2006-11-22 11:45:55 · answer #6 · answered by melissa052572 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys like a little eye candy sometimes, and they look just as much as we women do and you know chances are you like to look at other men too! It doesn't mean that you'd act on it. Maybe try doing the same thing to him and see how it makes him feel. If you don't want to do that, then sit him down and talk to him heart to heart and let him know how it makes you feel. Communication is ALWAYS the key! Good luck to ya :}
2006-11-22 11:34:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Easy. If you've told him such behaviour makes you uncomfortable and he answers with the usual - you're overreacting, it doesn't mean anything etc... Simply tell him that you have reconsidered and he's free to flirt, so long as he says nothing when you start to do the same! Tit for tat.
2006-11-22 11:37:29 · answer #8 · answered by Roy P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number 1; it is wrong. He is married and married to you.
Number 2; she is "no" friend.
Number 3; ever heard of the "7 year itch?" in a marriage? Sounds like he is scratching it. Be careful, don't be blind.
2006-11-22 12:19:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should confront him about it and ask him how would he feel if some guy flirted with you or if you flirted with other guys.its to close to home now because he said i do to you and only you and if he cant drop the flirting then you should drop him who's to say that his flirting doesn't lead to sleeping with these women. good luck
2006-11-22 11:45:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋