on my best friends wedding night she was the only sober person because she is pregnant. i was the maid of honor and ended up hooking u with the best man. long story short this caused some serious issues between me and her. we didnt talk for a week and a half and now we are talking but we never discussed what happened that night or why she was mad. its created this akwardness between us and i really want to deal with it and so does she but neither of us know how to go about it. oh and did i mention she is pregnant. we have been friends 13 years and this is the most akward things have ever been. i just dont know how to approach the situation?
2006-11-22 06:25:13 · 13 answers · asked by NYC Princess of Contradictions 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
did i mention she had preconceived notions of hating this guy before she even met him based on stories she had heard about him. oh and apparently her younger sister was passed out in the front seat of the car, which i was unaware of completely.
2006-11-25 06:36:57 · update #1
Is the best man married? Are you? Involved with anyone?? If not, I don't get it. You're single, he's single, you have too much to drink and you hook up. If you are both consenting, single adults, so be it. Your choice.
Maybe she's upset that "hooking up" was even a part of her special day???
Just ask her. You've been friends for 13 years. Take her to coffee (decaf, in her case!:), or drop by for a vist, invite her over...whatever. Tell her you feel the tension and can't stand the awkwardness between you, you care, what's wrong, how do we fix this? Etc... If you're really good friends, the two of you can work it out. Laugh like girls, discuss the pregnancy, her new marriage and your (ugh) "hook up." It'll be fine.
Honesty is the best policy. Maybe show her that you're concerned enough to post this question...???
Best of luck with it - I couldn't stand it if there were tension between me and my best friend. Go. Fix it. (:
2006-11-22 06:31:12 · answer #1 · answered by Grá 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it weighs this heavy on your heart then you should clear the air,first, I would get her off to the side by asking to speak with her, then I would appologize for whatever it was that offended her, after all, 13 years is a long friendship and should not be tossed away over an incident that is, as of now, in the past, and after amends are made, that is where it should stay, and if she is a true friend, she'll forgive and forget, their are some mistakes that you will make in life that will be so bad that you simply cannot go back and fix them, all you can do is set things right as best you can and muddle your way on through,THAT'S LIFE!!GOOD LUCK!!
2006-11-22 06:46:18 · answer #2 · answered by trekkie1972566 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've been friends for 13 years, you should be able to get past this.....but it would probably be best to get it out in the open. Since you don't understand why she's upset about you hooking up with the Best Man, then ask her.....I would broach the topic first by telling her how much your relationship & friendshop with her means to you and how you would never consciously try to damage that. Tell her that you thinks she's upset about what happened that night and you want to talk about it to clear up any misconceptions or problems. Is the Best Man a relative of her or her husbands? Did she used to date him? Just trying to think of reasons she might have gotten upset about it. But open communication while confirming how much she means to you is the best way to go. You can't try to fix anything until you know what's wrong!
2006-11-22 06:34:26 · answer #3 · answered by sharonj_1017 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, she shouldn't be pissed because you hooked up with the best man, unless one of you is married.... but just say "look, I know that this is bugging you, can we talk about it"? Just be open and honest with her. You've been friends for this long, surely you can just cut to the chase and discuss it like two mature adults.... Just don't get upset at what she says and try to remain objective. Good Luck....
2006-11-22 06:28:53 · answer #4 · answered by favrd1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 13 years this has come between you? Just sit down with her and say look, what happened after your wedding has made stuff really weird between us, so let's clear the air and move on....A long friendship like that is worth a little discomfort to save.
2006-11-22 06:28:14 · answer #5 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's hard to discuss anything while pregnant. The hormones change SO rapidly. Maybe if you quickly ask what exactly is bothering her. Then...walk away and address the issues one at a time when she might be in a better mood.
2006-11-22 06:28:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not really sure of the story, but I would just try confronting her. See if you can be rational about the situation with her. If you have been friends for that long, I'm sure if you just sit down and talk things will work their way out!
2006-11-22 06:28:49 · answer #7 · answered by Lo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call her and ask her out to lunch to discuss what happened at her wedding. apologize because you probably embarrassed her, first you were drunk, second you hit it off with the best man for the night, and hell knows what else you were dong because you were wasted. also why do people like who can't handle their liquor drink anyway.
2006-11-22 06:34:15 · answer #8 · answered by prettypueo1812 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
believe me i've been through these situations, its always better to at leats discuss it, and yell at eachother, get everything out, or that will always be hangin over your friendship. yell at eachother and cry togehter, she may be mad, but u have to let it all out of eachotehr systems its the only way to stay real friends.
2006-11-22 06:30:08 · answer #9 · answered by acad_addiex3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes females tend to be overly sensitive during pregnancy especially. i think you should approach the topic straight out, tell her you value her friendship more than that one crazy night. but once you both have gotten it off your chest dont bring it up again.
2006-11-22 06:44:39 · answer #10 · answered by atts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋