Her husband moved out a year ago and wants to come home. My husband and I know that he was dating another woman in the meantime. He has told my friend (his wife)that he wasn't involved with someone else while gone. I know her as well. I saw them out together last week and she says that they are just friends, nothing is going on. Maybe not now, but it was. Another steof mutaual frineds had them over together several times (No, they are not friends with the wife.)What would you do?
2006-11-22 05:24:30 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She probably already knows, the I am just friend story. If you are a true friend, talk to her and ask her how she is feeling about her feelings of letting him come back home. Ask if she has doubts and why. If she ask you if you know anything then tell her. She will just be asking you what she already knows. Then be there for her when she needs you the most. Do not lie and cover for the no good cheater. Being seperated does not make it right to go with someone else you are still illegal married. The cheaters think it makes it alright. It is not by law in most states
2006-11-22 05:38:09 · answer #1 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should definitely know, and I know it's a burden for you because you don't want to hurt her, or have her mad at you if she doesn't believe you. But this is information she needs to be able to make decisions concerning the rest of her life. It would be better if you have some sort of proof, but if you don't then just hope she trusts in your friendship enough to believe you. Make sure you approach her first with assuring her you'll always be there for her in whatever decisions she makes, etc., and that you don't want to hurt her but that you think she needs this information. Another way, if the situation allows, you might approach her husband and tell him that he needs to be honest with her, but don't tell him that you'll tell her or else he'll be sure to get to her first with his version. Maybe if he thinks a lot of people know and it'll get back to his wife, then he'll get scared into telling her before she finds out. Anyway, those that are saying to mind your own business are just selfish because being a true friend means helping your friend in all situations, not just the ones that are comfortable. Good luck.
2006-11-22 13:40:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First let's get this straight: technically if he has moved out then he is not cheating. Even if they are still married so long as he is not living in the home he isn't a cheater.
Now, you and your husband need to keep your mouths shut about what he is doing/has done while they have been apart. It is up to his wife to decide whether or not she wants to allow her husband to come back home and all you can do is respect her decision.
2006-11-22 14:52:00 · answer #3 · answered by mvngs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look for your own sake and health leave this alone. This is none of your business. Sooner or later your best friend will find out. These things always seem to work ways back to the individual who it relates to. Noone likes a "rat" someone snitching and tending to business that is absolutely none of their business. Leave alone and you will acquire no enemies.
2006-11-22 13:50:44 · answer #4 · answered by Rooster 1972 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is your best friend, then you should know what is best for her. Some women would be happier not knowing since they were separated. But then again the husband could be bringing back STDs or something. Personally I would want to know. What would she want?
2006-11-22 13:52:12 · answer #5 · answered by Lindsey M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am inclined to go with the put yourself in her shoes. How about if you ask her, "if he was with someone else while you were apart would you want to know?" I would want to know due to the simple fact that there are too many STD's out there. A bunch of them you won't know about unless you go to the Dr.
2006-11-22 13:39:23 · answer #6 · answered by melkhel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has a right to know what she may be sharing in her bedroom if she takes him back. There are to many diseases to keep this secret from your friend, she has a right to know and if you were any kind of friend you would tell her. I know you don't want to get involved or hurt her but she has a right to know.
2006-11-22 13:44:40 · answer #7 · answered by mistypa12000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay as far away from that one as you can get....last thing you want is to be stuck in the middle..or accused of causing any kind of trouble....should probably just stick to you and your hubby and YOUR own happiness!!
2006-11-22 14:12:19 · answer #8 · answered by Shelly B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As helpful as you would like to be, mind your own business. If they work things out then she could be ill toward you for telling her kind of like shooting the messenger, I'd mind my own.
2006-11-22 14:15:23 · answer #9 · answered by missy j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't get involved in these dramas --- Just be a friend and encourage her to guard her heart and not to rush things --- if she doesn't take sound advice she has no one to blame but herself....
2006-11-22 14:06:55 · answer #10 · answered by jaimestar64cross 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋