i have been married almost 5 years, living together for seven years, and together for 10 years total. no children, but a 80 lb golden retriever whom we acquired together when the dog was a puppy. my husband has an engineering undergrad degree and a MBA from a prestigious university. he earns 6 figures plus annually. i have been in grad school throughout most of our marriage and only working part time. he has paid the majority of expenses over the years. we have no debt and about $200K in assets (mutual funds, IRA, stocks, etc). we own no real estate. we live in nj, a community property state. if we divorce, will i be entitled to half of our assets. we have no prenup. i am a designer and make considerably less than he does. in addition, he did not attempt to have sex with me for one entire year, from jan 2005-jan 2006. please advise. thanks.
2006-11-22 04:36:47 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you want a divorce please see a good divorce lawyer. And no sex for a year is a sign that divorce may be warranted here.
2006-11-23 01:45:27 · answer #1 · answered by evilbarrister 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'll give the same answer I gave a week ago. You keep asking the same question, or variations of the same question...
The laws depend on the state.
Remember, most divorces are not resolved in a court room, but in negotiations between the lawyers.
So the advice to seek good legal counsel is the best.
We can give guidelines and share from our experiences, but your outcome depends upon your state's laws and what you and your husband agree upon.
With a marriage of less than 10 years, spousal support in most states is highly unlikely.
In most states, marital misconduct doesn't entitle a former spouse to spousal support either. So if you cheated, it doesn't cost you anything, and if he cheated, it doesn't help your case.
Some details about my case in IL. The circumstances are similar with regards to income. I'm multi-degreed with degrees from a top 20 university here in the US, making 5x what my ex-wife made.
We were married for 7 years before her affair. We had one child.
I pay her child support, and nothing more. She got 1/2 of the assets accumulated during the marriage, but none of the assets I had before we married.
I kept the house, and the debt she ran up was split based on income.
Today, three years later, I am out of debt (except for my modest mortgage), still in the home, paying child support, and paid none of her legal costs and zero spousal maintenance.
I am able to save 20% of what I make, give generously to my church, and still enjoy life. I may drive a Toyota instead of a BMW, but that's a small price to pay ;)
So, given you were supported during the marriage and probably obtained your education with marital assets, I would not expect spousal support, regardless of what lifestyle you've grown accustomed to.
Of course, your mileage may vary.
2006-11-22 04:55:25 · answer #2 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried to talk with your husband to find out why he does not want to have sex with you any more. You sound like you are ready to move on, why are you having an affair? Why are you giving up with out seeking counciling. Or are you just interested in getting everything you can get, which is what it sounds like. It depends on where you live on what you are entitled to. I suggest you talk with a counciler first before a lawyer . You have it made and don't know it honey the world out there is rough and you are on the top financially. Work on the sex part and loving part of your marriage together. Divorce is not what it is cracked up to be .
2006-11-22 07:02:25 · answer #3 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will receive at least 50% of your shared assets. The percentage typically increases when the woman earn less income than the man. You will also receive alimony if you make less than your husband. Alimony is typically paid for half the term of the mar rage (2 1/2 years).
2006-11-22 04:43:51 · answer #4 · answered by bethanybuilder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think the "no sex" part relates to any divorce proceedings or how much money you get out of it, but the fact that you live in a community property state means that you are entitled to half and you may also be able to get some alimony if your choose to pursue it since you are accustomed to living in a manner that you currently cannot financially provide for yourself.
2006-11-22 04:41:23 · answer #5 · answered by whatever 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything considered an asset of the marriage would be subject to "equitable distribution"...which is usuallly determined by a judge, since the divorcing couple usually can't agree on how to divide the assets. that does NOT mean an autumatic entitlement to "half of everything"....ALL factors are considered.
Lack of sex won't have anything to do with it....but one partner having an affair WOULD.
2006-11-22 04:44:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to take the cheap way out... but I think you should speak with a lawyer about community property laws during a divorce.
The no sex thing says a lot to me.
2006-11-22 04:40:29 · answer #7 · answered by joencrystal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to an attorney about the community property laws, but first...PLEASE talk to your husband and possibly a counselor about the lack of intimacy. Sounds like there is a problem, and you need to at least try to resolve it before seeking legal advice.
Good luck.
2006-11-22 04:43:38 · answer #8 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES BEING MARRIED YOU GET HALF OF ALL THE CONJUGAL ASSETS AND PROPERTIES.. THAT MEANS ALL ASSETS YOU HAVE BOTH ACQUIRED DURING THE MARRIAGE.I THINK NOT HAVING SEX IS NO GROUND FOR DIVORCE bUT THIS MAY BE A SIGN OF HIS BEING UNFAITHFUL TO YOU. HIRE A DETECTIVE THEN YOU CAN HAVE PROOF AND YOU CAN CHARGE HIM WITH A CASE ON DULTERY.
2006-11-22 04:59:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Holly smoke, the whole year without sex. What happened after Jan, 06 then? Call me, I love having sex. *LOL*
2006-11-22 05:02:18 · answer #10 · answered by phone_man_at_work 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋