I plan to breastfeed my third child when she gets here next month. Some of my family members are disgusted by that and don't think I should attend family functions if I need to feed her unless I banish myself to the back room. Even if done modestly, some of them feel the sound of the sucking baby is disgusting. However, the sucking from a bottle is somehow OK.
I was very hurt by the reaction and felt very ganged up on when we talked about it. Some people feel the breasts are only for sexual reasons, and if a woman breastfeeds, they don't want to explain why the baby is suckling on my breast to their children. Is this sick or what? I wonder how they explain those magazines at the grocery store check out and the commercials, movies and video games to their children.
I would love your honest opinions on this.
2006-11-22 01:57:06 · 28 answers · asked by Lady J 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I have a 2 month old daughter AND a 2 month old nephew. My mother didn't breastfeed my siblings and I so I was a little nervous about it also. My sister was pregnant the same time I was, and she was set on bottlefeeding, no question. I wanted to breastfeed because I knew it was the healthiest option for my baby. My mom and sister didn't believe I'd last more than a day or two. They also thought it immodest, even if done tastfully. They also thought of it as a sexual thing. I just had to force myself to move past their criticisms and negativity because I knew this would be a very special thing to do for my daughter. It has proven to be a wonderful bonding experience with her, and I don't regret it one bit.
2006-11-22 18:55:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
1st off I am not a very blunt person I am very shy though it may not seem this way when I write but believe me I am….Your family better be glad that there not my family or I would tell them off…..I am just mad thinking about how they just treated you and I am not a mom yet (I have been trying to get pregnant and I have 10 nieces and nephews and worked at day cares ). You can go to WWW.BEBEAULAIT.COM they have nursing shawls/wraps they used to be called Hooter Hidders but changed the name. Anyway God gave women breast so that we could feed our children. Your family thinks that a woman’s breast is for a mans entertainment then what did the women get ??? I hope its not our husbands thing down there cuz I don’t find it attractive (not any mans). LoL As for what are they going to tell there children, well that’s not your problem but they could tell them the TRUTH not many people are that bright now days I guess.... God gave mommies breast so that we could feed our babies. Then the child will say but Bobby takes a bottle and then you say well he eat formula that a factory made where as my milk came straight from God J As for the sucking sound you would hear less sucking from the breast instead of the bottle…duh… Don’t try to please them you have a child now and think of your child you have your own family to take care of and they better be glad they aren’t mine cuz I would tell them….Well if this is going to bother you than I suggest you just don’t come to the hospital when I have the baby because I am going to breast feed my child and if you have issues about it then I suggest you get some help and work them out!!!!!!!! Plus anyways once they see the baby this might all blow over….Why are they putting stress on you when you are pregnant???? Well I guess there for the Airline that kicked that woman off for breastfeeding her child which by the way the stewardess got in trouble for and the mom is suing the airlines……..Ha ~ Good Luck~
2006-11-22 03:29:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Listen honey, breastfeeding is the BEST thing you can do for your baby. Stick to your guns and let them know that you want to give your baby a healthy start in life. Let alone the health bennifits for you!( why wouldnt they want you and your baby to be as healthy as possible) Recently in the news here in NH there was a woman asked to get off a plane because she was breastfeeding her baby on the plane. This sparked a lot of contorversy and many women in many states held a "nurse-in" in the airports. My sister and i both breast feed. Our side of the family is very for breastfeeding. OUr in-laws sides however are not. You just need to sick to your guns and know that what you are doing is in the best intrest for you and your baby. No one can tell you not to breastfeed your baby, in most places in the US they cant even ask you to cover up or leave... its actually state laws now. I wonder how they feel about animals feeding then... they suckle from their moms. just explain to them that if they dont like it when your feeding your baby and doing what was intended for your breasts then they can leave the room, you should be able to nurse where and when you want to! Good luck sweetie and email me if you want some more support!
2006-11-22 02:16:13 · answer #3 · answered by scottliz2005 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing to be going through this with these horrible people in your surroundings. Breast feeding is not only the most natural way to feed your baby, but healthier. Medical reports show that a baby feed from breast milk (even for only 3 months) is most unlikely to develope any illness, asthma or any other cronic conditions.
Other people conclude that it is easier then messing with bottles & formula, in which is true. I breastfeed my son, now 21 months. I often got looks & remarks about the situation. In return I informed them that I was providing for my son as he nursed while we walked through the stores getting diapers & so forth.
Good for you & your choice to breastfeed. Just remember, you are the soul provider of your baby, not them. If a tiffy arises, you will have to decide on how to handle them your own way, if it were me handling it, it wouldn't be pretty-trust me.
2006-11-22 04:10:40 · answer #4 · answered by yu247365 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you are going through this with your family. I think that breastfeeding is a wonderful bond that a mother can have with her baby. It's the most natural thing in the world. Plus it's much better for the baby than formula. It boosts their immune system. Maybe you should just tell them that your baby's health means more to you than their "family gatherings" & if they want to ban you to a back room when the baby is hungry, you just won't attend them. It may sound harsh, but it might be necessary. Find pamphlets or books on the benefits of breastfeeding and send them to them. Maybe it's just being uneducated about why women do it. If after that, they still are "sickened" by the thoughts of you breastfeeding your baby, then tell them that it's your decision, not theirs. If they still want to ban you from family gatherings, tell them it's their loss. I am sorry that your family is so closed minded about this. I hope they change their minds and accept this. Good luck!!! Congrats on the new addition!!!!
2006-11-22 02:55:03 · answer #5 · answered by Crystal 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that their appears to be some very misinformed people in your family. When I nursed my daughter, you couldn't even hear a sucking sound. If breasts weren't meant for feeding children they wouldn't produce milk. It seems silly to me for somebody to argue this fact.
Breastfeeding is the best start for your baby, and as the baby's mommy, that's your choice... not your family's choice. If they want to be silly enough to argue with doctors and medical professionals who actually went to school and understand the benefits of breast feeding then that truly shows ignorance.
Children have a right to eat. If they don't want to explain to their children something as natural as breastfeeding (which makes me wonder how the birds and bees conversation will go....) then maybe they should stay home in their bubbles.
There is NOTHING WRONG with breastfeeding as long as it is done modestly!
2006-11-22 02:11:17 · answer #6 · answered by tonetones03 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Your family members are being idiots.
Your breasts are there for feeding a baby. There is absolutely no other reason God made you with breasts!!
Breastfeeding is completely natural and your family should be proud that you are educated enough to know the importance of breastfeeding your child.
I have not heard of people reacting this way to breastfeeding!! Is your family totally out of it or just completely clueless?
I am so sorry you have to deal with that tyoe of attiatude!! I would get your thoughts together and let them know exactly how idiotic they are being. Let them know you will be reastfeeding and if they have a problem with it, THEY can go sit in the back room until you are finished.
2006-11-22 02:07:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I had a similar situation when my daughter was born 2 yrs ago with my in-laws. None of them had ever breastfed and they thought it was gross, and you shouldn't do it in public. At first, when they were around, I would go to another room, but then I just decided it was too bad. My daughter needed to eat, I would cover with a blanket and we were fine. I don't think they necessarily liked it, but that was something THEY were going to have to deal with I decided. I think it was a good impression however on my neice to see me do this because it was her mom & grandma & sister who thought it just horrible, but she had a baby in May and I was very happy that she decided to breastfeed against their wishes, so to speak. Unfortunately she didn't keep it up for long and switched to formula, but every little bit helps.
Personally I think it's the most natural, safe way to feed your baby. The bonding is everlasting and the convenience (& cost) is the only way to go. I'm pregnant now with baby #2 and plan to do it the same way as last time. Whether they like it or not!
2006-11-22 02:24:30 · answer #8 · answered by missionhtg 4 · 6⤊ 0⤋
It's not like you take your shirt off and breastfeed in the middle of the room (I hope) so go to a private and comfortable spot to breastfeed if it makes them uncomfortable or pump beforehand. They can choose to avoid you while you are feeding, it's your choice to do it and they should not give you a hard time. I have difficulty believing that no one if your family has ever breastfed a baby and find it "disgusting" especially when they have children themselves.
2006-11-22 02:07:05 · answer #9 · answered by snarf 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My sister was a little nervous about me breastfeeding in front of my 4 year old nephew at first. But after the first time its no big deal. He was fascinated and asked a lot of questions. And now its a big bore to him. When the baby starts crying he will go to the diaper bag and pull out a blanket and hand it to me now to cover myself with, and then tell everyone the baby has to eat now. My 16 year old step brother hightails it out of the room when the baby starts crying at family functions, but other than that, everyone else is pretty much oblivious to whats going on, other than the occasional laughter and comments about enjoying his meal when the baby gets a little overzealous and sucks pretty loud.
2006-11-22 02:07:34 · answer #10 · answered by sugar 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋