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I have a few important things to tell you, and I don’t know the best way to bring you my message. I am no good at conversations and the mail is too slow, so I am emailing you. I think I will be best understood this way.



I don’t know where to start, but first I want to thank you for the kindness, generosity, and attention you’ve shown me over the past 2 months. This has been a very special time, and I have enjoyed getting to know you and experiencing the pleasure of your company.



It would be selfish of me to pretend that we do not have a few differences. I have been honest with you in answering all questions, but some facts remain unsaid.



Several times over the course of getting to know you, you’ve mentioned in your outlook for the future that one goal you’d like to reach is to get married. For the purpose of total honesty, I cannot continue to refrain from telling you that personally, I currently have no future interest in becoming married and/or living with one

2006-11-22 01:23:08 · 19 answers · asked by beat_this_program 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

19 answers

Tell her thank you very much for your honesty and letting you know how she feels. You can also tell her that it is your desire to get married, have a family and settle down. You can also ask her what made her think she was the one. Did you ask her to marry you? Tell her thanks for the memories and the time, but since you and her do not see eye to eye, you are going to move on.

2006-11-22 01:28:56 · answer #1 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 3 0

I respect her honesty. However, the key is:

"I currently have no future interest "

That is how she feels. That might (and likely will, one day) change, but it might not.

You didn't say your ages. If you are both 30 and you want to get married and start a family and she might be 10+ years from such a thing, you're better off breaking up now while you are still early. Don't waste each other's lives.
If you are both 19 or something I wouldn't worry too much. Lots can change and it always does.

2006-11-22 01:29:11 · answer #2 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 2 0

I think I'd start by saying that just because you have a potential outlook with a view (and only a view) of getting married. That would clearly depend upon the circumstances at the time and whether it fitted in with your combined lifestyles.

In truth though, I think that she is giving you a brush off. I have a few female friends who have told guys this in order to minimise the hurt felt by the rejected person. Maybe she's already met someone else and is trying to pave the way to move on to them?

An ex of mine did the exact same thing and in all honesty, I just let her walk away and in the long run...........I'm so much happier for it!

2006-11-22 01:33:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

First of all a real woman would come to you instead of emailing you so that you two can have a mature conversation about the matters of the heart..seeing as how she didnt come to you and express her feelings I would be the bigger and better person and go to her and tell her how I feel instead of emailing back or if there is distance between the two I would call her.Its obvious that she has enjoyed your company but doesnt want to take it any further than that so you have to take what she said and move on now that you know how she truly feels about.She didnt lead you on she just decided to take the immature way of telling you that its over..when in fact if she was a mature adult she would have told you face to face so that you could discuss the issue

2006-11-22 01:39:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

She says she's 'no good at conversations?' She's no good at considering how you feel, either. I think her avoidance of telling you this in person and her very formal 'thank you for the kindness', etc. is impersonal and dismissive. Respond with a brief recognition that you received her e-mail, no details necessary, and move on. Difficult as it might be if you have developed strong feelings for her, at least it was only two months. Give yourself a little time and you'll look back with gratitude that you bowed out gracefully with no protests. Good luck..you'll find someone with more substance.

2006-11-24 05:23:23 · answer #5 · answered by Essmi d 2 · 0 0

Life is too short to be unequally yoked. Some people are not marriage material; however ig you believe this is the "one," let go and she will come back. If she doesn't come back, Divine Intervention leads me to believe that someone is coming that will be more perfect. The one thing you should not do is search yourself to see if there is something wrong with you. Never doubt you.

2006-11-22 01:42:08 · answer #6 · answered by LOLO W 3 · 0 0

She is telling you the relationship is over - she is moving on and wants you to do the same. I would suggest you write her back and thank you for being so honest, that you appreciate the time you spent with her and you wish her well. Then end the contact and go your own way.

2006-11-22 01:29:29 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel 7 · 2 0

please dont tell me you are pushing to tie the knot after only 2 months. your scaring her away. any guy who would push that soon to get married screams TRAP for a woman. if you want to stay with her awhile and see where it goes just reply that you understand whats been said and you'd still like very much to continue dating her. if your in that big a rush to get married just tell her your not going to date her exclusivly anymore and keep an open eye out for bigger and better things. she seems like a nice girl so be nice back. she just dont want you getting your hopes up on something that she's not ready for.

2006-11-22 01:33:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Well thank you for your email and your honesty ....I have told you what my plans for the future is and since you obviously has no interest in this I will be moving on with my life with a woman who knows what she wants out of life...good luck

2006-11-22 01:28:16 · answer #9 · answered by nitenurse 5 · 3 0

Seems kind of cut and dried to me. I would thank her for her honesty and offer to remain friends. As with relationships where one partner wants kids and the other doesn't, it would appear that the two of you are ultimately incompatible. Sorry.

2006-11-22 01:40:25 · answer #10 · answered by anita.revolution 2 · 0 0

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