Ok..here it goes I work at night, lots of weekends and holidays. Now a new tradition has crept into our life called thirsty thursday.....her girlfriend and husband come over to my house and have cocktails weather I'm here or not.......she goes out almost every friday nite when I'm working......but we never go out on nites I'm off weather it's friday or saturday.......does anybody see a problem here or am I being selfish.....I haven't said anything and it's been going on for about 3-4 months.
2006-11-22 00:57:52 · 23 answers · asked by Monte T 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dude- Let's be honest here...you are not being selfish at all. Something sounds a tad off here! Having friends over is one thing but going out without you every time is a tad strange in my opinion. Esp. since she never wants to go out with you to a club. Tip to nip this party lady in the bud
2006-11-22 01:08:08 · answer #1 · answered by troll_house_kookies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is definitely a problem. At the back of your mind, you think she is seeing somebody else. This is very natural and she may or she may not. I have had similar experience. Suggest one of the days that you go out to some night place and see what she has to say. Keeping quiet does not help as it creates a gap between the two of you which could result in divorce. Talk over it, even if you feel uncomfortable about it for one reason or another. The problem is therefore yours together or with each other and should be dealt with by the people involved. She probably needs a spark in her life which she misses by always being at home with you when you are not at work. Good luck dearl colleague.
2006-11-22 09:16:50 · answer #2 · answered by 1967 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, I have seen a lot of people i know do this and it is the first sign of your marriage falling apart. Every couple i have know, when one goes off on nights out have either had an affair or split up. I'm not talking about every case in the world but I'm talking of a lot of people i have known. You are not being selfish but you are working too much and if your marriage falls apart it's not worth it . It sounds like you are drifting apart, or she got tired of waiting for you. She now likes her nights out but not with you. Insist you go out on nights you have off. What's her girlfriend and husband like ? are they trust worthy? Do you get on with them? Spend some quality time with your wife.
2006-11-22 09:19:45 · answer #3 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's not cheating on you now, she soon will be. Why don't you take the initiative and ask her out on a date or something. Or on a Friday when she knows you're working and she's going out come home instead and show interest in going out with her. Her reaction to that will tell you right there. If she welcomes it and is excited for you to join in then cool - if not, well........ Good luck my friend.
2006-11-22 09:08:38 · answer #4 · answered by T C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, as far as Thirsty Thursdays...your wife is staying home. I don't see a problem with that. Why don't you ask her out on a "date" on your next weekend night off. If she says no, but goes out with her friends, then you might have a problem that should be addressed.
2006-11-22 09:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by life made better thru chemistry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you wait 3-4 months to talk to your wife about something that is hurting you? Is it possible that lack of communication is the problem? I don't agree that she is cheating. Maybe she thinks you don't want to go out since you work most of the time. You won't know any answers until you talk to her. DON'T let a lack of communication destroy your marriage. You loved her enough to marry her, now it's time to love her enough to work on your marriage. It will require a lot of talking, listening, respect and honesty, but don't give up. Good luck and God bless.
2006-11-22 09:07:58 · answer #6 · answered by creole woman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
since you are never there she has made her own habits that do not include you.. you need to make it so you have a habit of your own date night your not being selfish to want to spend time with your wife but since you are never there she has dealt with it by making friends. so set up two fridays or whatever day a month and agree to go out or in together after a couple of dates you will feel great and plan it ahead of time so your wife can break anyother plans
2006-11-22 09:05:32 · answer #7 · answered by christina c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it bothers you why have you not said anything? It is not fair that you have been allowing this resentment to build for over 3 months without letting your wife know how you feel. Your feelings may be selfish, but they are valid feelings that need to be discussed before your resentment explodes.
2006-11-22 09:10:57 · answer #8 · answered by babydoll 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I THINK YOU NEED TO SNEAK HOME EARLY ON ONE OF HER THIRSTY THURSDAY'S TO MAKE SURE THE THREE OF THEM ARE NOT SEXIN IN YOUR HOUSE FIRST OF ALL! IF SHE WOULD RATHER HANG OUT ALONE AND NOT BE WITH YOU THEN THERE IS A PROBLEM DON'T BE THE A** YOUR A HARD WORKER AND SHE DOES'T APPRECIATE IT. ITS HARD TO FIND A HARD WORKING MAN YOU SHOULD SIT HER DOWN AND LET HER KNOW HOW YOU FEEL IF YOU DONT SEE ANY CHANGES GIVE HER THE BOOT!!! GOOD LUCK!
2006-11-22 09:17:14 · answer #9 · answered by ENVY-ME 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she may think it wont be any fun going out with you,,maybe telling her you miss her and it would be nice to go on a 'date',,she sees these people all the time and knows she is going to have a laugh and may not want to stay at home with you if she has got into the pattern of thinking she must go elsewhere,,you can also make the effort to go out with them as a foursome,,show you want to be part of it all and you may get somewhere.she already has responsible (insert your name) now show her fun ( i name),you might enjoy it and if the two of you actually remember how to get on she will be quite pleased and should want to go out with that side of you more often
2006-11-22 09:08:58 · answer #10 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋