In an otherwise happy relationship, how would you react, or reacted, to the revelation that your other half frequently(once a week for argument's sake) used cannibis or in more extreme cases XTC or LSD.
I ask because my friends and I have used drugs in the past, one of my best mates confessed that he still did occassionally to his long term girl friend and she went quite boogaloo at him and their relationship changed quite drastically.
How would you folks feel?
2006-11-22 00:32:44 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
These answers are a lot more varied than I anticipated :) Keep em coming. Imagine you're boy came up to you on a sunday and said, "when i was younger, i took e's every weekend, haven't done in about a year. Last night went out with the lads and we dropped a few." I'm paraphrasing - but you get the gist.
2006-11-22 00:41:31 · update #1
I think there's a big difference between someone who has a bit of puff or an ecky once in a while, and someone whose life is dominated by drugs.
3 simple questions will allow you to tell the difference (and btw this applies to alcohol just as much as to untaxed drugs):
1. Is the person able to hold down a job and not get into bother because of their drug/alcohol intake (e.g. missing work on Mondays cos they're too hung over)?
2. Do they become difficult to deal with, or aggressive, or mouthy when they indulge?
2. Do they have good long term relationships with friends, family, bf or gf?
As far as I can see as long a someone can earn a living, maintain good relationships, and not become an a*sehole while off the faces, then there's not much to worry about.
Yes, it would be safer if nobody did drugs and everybody stuck to the 2 glasses of wine a day rule. But it's never going to happen, is it?
2006-11-22 01:00:35 · answer #1 · answered by mcfifi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If my boyfriend told me something like that, I'd be pretty worried about him. We've both dabbled in the past but never taken anything stronger than LSD or speed and haven't used anything at all for years. I would be especially bothered if he took something like ectasy though because just one tab can kill you. His girlfriend probably freaked because she was scared for him and upset that he hadn't told her that he was still using. I can see how it would change their relationship as it's probably made her insecure and feel that if he didn't tell her about the drugs, what else is he keeping from her. I don't really understand people who feel that they need to take drugs or get hammered to have a good time but each to their own. I think they've got some trust issues to work out and they should sit down and have a good talk about it.
2006-11-22 01:04:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and talk to her first of all ask her if there's something going on that makes her feel like she wants to take drugs maybe something is bothering her. If not i guess it depends on your own personal opinion many people disagree with drugs but that's because my mother died from drugs! It started out it was a once a week then everyother day thing then an everyday thing! Now i am living with the consequence of it all. I totally disagree if you do then just try and explain to her that it concerns you and just want the best for her! Drugs aern't a joking matter they are serious and i pity anyone who gets into them! Try and help her and just give her insight maybe there's a more positive way that she can express feelings!
2006-11-22 00:43:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex had cannabis occasionally, as well as experimenting in legal highs. I'd made it clear to him that I wouldn't kiss a smoker (ick) or be around him when he was smoking. So, though apparently he also enjoyed the odd cigarette, he never did any of these things in front of me. He was also apparently tempted to try LSD, but never did as far as I know.
I guess because he'd already been honest about it (to the point of, "look at this hash I bought today") it didn't bother me. I think I'd be more unsettled if I felt my BF had deceived me. The occasional joint doesn't bother me (That said, I knew it was a bad sign when I found my ex much less stressful to be with after he'd had some cannabis). I think LSD etc. would concern me a lot more, partly through health concerns. I don't think I'd even consider being with someone who was a heavy smoker, an alcoholic, or any kind of drug addict. Aside from effects on personality, I'd rather not have a BF who's slowly killing himself.
2006-11-22 00:44:21 · answer #4 · answered by Helen B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The problem I would have is not that they do drugs, thats fine, they aren't doing anything too adictive, and hopefully they are being reasonably sensible about it.
The major problem would be that they hadn't told me until now. Why hide it? It makes the person that doesn't know feel really bad about themselves. Like you couldn't trust them, or you think that they are really square/not fun loving, or just generally bad.
I smoke weed regularly, and would make no attempt to hide it from someone I was going out with. I wouldn't necessarily do it with them, as it could be uncomfortable if the situation wasn't right. But they would know about it. I have been on the other side of this, as well. I was hooking up with a guy that I know. My friend had given him something or other whilst I was in the toilet. So my friend, her boyfriend and the guy I was with had taken some kind of downer, and they had hidden it from me. Not even offered!!
So when it came to bed time and sex, he was having some real trouble. So I started feeling self consious etc. so he told me why, because of the drugs.
I couldn't see the point of doing the drug if you weren't going to enjoy them. Hiding and trying to act like your not on something is not my idea of fun. If i'm on something I like to actually experience it.
Basically nothing wrong with doing drugs (if you're sensible) but be honest! If they don't like it one of you needs to decide, who will change their behaviour.
Sorry spell check not working
2006-11-22 00:47:21 · answer #5 · answered by As You Like It 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Many times
2016-05-22 14:00:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a non drug user Id be gutted. It wouldnt so much be the fact that he was using drugs - but the fact that I didnt know.
I can understand why she went mad when she heard this and Im sure she feels quite hurt.
I think with something as complex as drugs - you are either for or against and theres no real comprimising in the middle. xx
2006-11-22 00:36:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends which side of the "official" argument you want to listen to. Cannabis, LSD, E, Mesc, Amyl Nitrate, Cillit Bang and insurrection are all dreadful evil tools of either the devil or the communists - sometimes both.
Alcohol and nicotine, on the other hand, are perfectly safe.
You must listen to your caring,friendly government who know better and are the only ones who really care about you.
2006-11-22 00:42:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel like the guy was secretive and was keeping things from me. This isn't just about the drugs, it is about making the person you are in a relationship think you are clean, when you aren't. If it was in the past, I wouldn't care, but if he is STILL DOING IT, then I would care. He needs to stop.
2006-11-22 00:35:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
The long-term GF might be looking for someone to be the father of her children. If so, a drug user probably won't make the cut.
2006-11-22 00:44:23 · answer #10 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋