supervisor takes things personally?

Question

there are times when my supervisor and i just clash, and I don't know what to do about it. I am not one to hide when I get frustrated and I find it healthy to vent. She takes it personally, and has written on my evaluation in the past that I make her feel uncomfortable. Since that evaluation I have done what I can to improve things, but I am not perfect.
Yesterday I had enough of the stress and it showed. I am not proud of this, and explained where I was at to my supervisor. Again I had the response that I make her feel uncomfortable. So what do I do other than remind myself not to vent to her or show any emotion.
Does any one else out there find it difficult to smile when you are stressed on the job? How can I learn to hide my feelings at the workplace? Should I even try to?
Any advice appreciated, thanks :)

Answer 1

sounds like this is a new supervisor. i would never ever tell one of my people that they make me feel uncomfortable, because it puts the relationship on a less than professional level. and it is not fair ...it is a means of intimidation.

there is nothing productive that can result from telling a subordinate this information.

my advice would be to smile and remember that you could be
-her- supervisor eventually, and it would be wise to remain professional even when she does not.

when these episodes happen, take a step back emotionally, as if you were watching this happen to someone else....maybe watching it on television. observe her reaction to your professionalism.

and promise yourself that when -you- are a supervisor, you will never ever treat one of your people with this amount of disrespect.

hang in there.

Answer 2

Oh my , do not bring your frustrations out!
I to feel one should not hold feeling in, I have also had so many job that working for myself has been something I have done for some time. I do not play well with others!
If the job is causing you this much stress it might be time to find something else. I have learned never bring personal feelings and or job stress out in the open. This is not job security but job destruction. Many people are just waiting to take your job!
This is so hard for some of us to do! I have worked man jobs and men usually do not do this, this is a womens thing I feel.
Good luck with your job and I feel your supervisor is not innocent in all this! There are good supervisors and bad.....

Answer 3

When people show too much emotion (especially at work) it gives the impression that they think others should be responsible for their feelings, that they lack impluse contol, and that they have poor coping skills.
These people act as if they need attention, sympathy, and they need others to care. Well, others don't have time to care when working. They have their own problems.
Others feel stress at times, so you are not the only one, maybe you are too wrapped up in your own stress to notice. Somehow they are able to manage it, rather than dumping it on YOUR desk.
Smile anyway. Never let them see you sweat. So what if you're stressed. No one cares. They have their own stress to deal with. Your stress if not their fault, and it's your responsibility to handle it yourself.
Sure, venting is good, but NOT at work. Do it on your own time. Your boss is trying to tell you this in a nice way.
Show everyone that you have a better set of coping skills and that you have impulse control. Force a smile and take the high road. Realize that no one cares about your stress, anymore than you care about theirs.
You don't have to NOT show any emotion, you just have to avoid making your feelings everyone else's responsibility to deal with. Grow up. Show them you're a big girl now, and you can handle it.

Answer 4

Stop what you are doing to make her uncomfortable she is your supervisor and you must respect her dont be bully or try to show off to others that you are not afraid of her,she is your boss, not because she is a woman you have the idea that you must no listen to her, try to get along with her justt like the others do, if you find it so hard to do so jus pack your bay and left the job, stop messing with the lady head,I can feel the viberation that you are the trouble maker, grow up and stop kid around, you are the one who is giving your self stress if their is any.

Answer 5

Do not forget a supervisor has a supervisor as well. If you are
sincere there will be some work stress. If you can establish your potential within the organisation you are in a better position to
argue. But burning in the heart and smilling on the lips, is the
name of the game. that does mean you allow someone to
sit on your shoulder. Female boss is always difficult to tackle.

Answer 6

If she's feeling uncomfortable, then you must be either verbally or physically intimidating to her, and that is not something you want her to experience, nor do you want that to continue going on your record. Either find another job with a better personality "fit", or learn to express your frustrations in more appropriate ways. We all get stressed on the job, and the suggestion to, for instance, take a walk to cool off is a very good one. It may take some practice, but I think you can learn to handle your stress in more appropriate ways. Put yourself in her position - would you want to be her empoyee? You may think to yourself "hey, I'm harmless, I just like to vent" but the fact is she's made it very clear to you that in this particular job, what you're doing is not appropriate. Good luck!

Answer 7

If your complany has an employee assistance program you might consider that route to help with the way you may be presenting yourself to others. You can only control your own self and not anyone else.
Otherwise you could confide in someone else in your organization that may have learned how to work with others in the organization.

Answer 8

And now you recognize why she is a supervisor at a coffee shop. She is a "chief" who believes that all of us yet her is incompetent, that the only thank you to get the activity executed precise is to do it your self, and she or he needless to say does not understand the which capacity of delegation. while it gets busy, she gets under pressure. In that under pressure state she wrongly believes that she is the only one that does it as rapid as she does. that's barely with the aid of fact the adrenaline is pumping and she or he's calling contained in the time of the worldwide via adrenaline glasses. the subsequent time you get so disillusioned, wait till element calm down and confer along with her. tell her which you recognize that she does no longer mean to be rude, yet while she pushes others off the bar, it feels rude and demeaning. in line with threat she gets the hint, yet i individually doubt it. with any success she will a minimum of be cognizant that she is stepping on ft. stable success and undergo in recommendations, if it gets to undesirable you may constantly pass or discover yet another activity.

Answer 9

you should hide your feelings and not let your supervisor know you are stressed. just do what i do, when i get stressed i take a break. i just tell my supervisor that i need a break and it cannot wait, then on my break i take a brisk walk and just take a few minutes to calm down.

Answer 10

i might try asking her in what way you can express frustration that is acceptable to her...
she has a responsibility to provide an avenue for her staff to provide feedback...
good luck~