Do you think that the word Obey should have been removed from wedding vows?

Question

Elizabeth Cady Stanton once said that marriage was nothing more than legalized prostitution do you agree.

Answer 1

At one time that may have been true. At one time, women were considered property. Now we have rights.

I do think OBEY should be kept in the marriage vows, but I think it needs to be the man promising to obey their wives. Cuz if we ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Answer 2

According to a preacher I know, the word obey had a different meaning when the wedding vows were first introduced. It meant respect and support. I dont agree with Elizabeth Stanton. Some marriages are probably like this, but most are not, not in this age anyway. Most women today are able to support themselves finacially without a husband, and most women are more assertive in expressing their own sexual needs. This can only be a good thing, because marriage then becomes a issue of love and sharing similar wants and needs, as it should be.

Answer 3

I think so. It pretty much goes without saying that if two people are in their right minds, have a general understanding and agreement with each other, they can make up their own minds if one asks the other to do something, reasonably of course. If my wife doesn't like anal sex yet I command her to do it, that's unreasonable by my standards. If we're sightseeing and she goes into an abandoned building out of curiosity, and I command her to come back (or even ask nicely before commanding) I don't think it's reasonable, only based on the fact that I'd be concerned for her safety. I don't think marriage is legalized prostitution though, because she doesn't give her earnings to her pimp, and guys shouldn't have to pay for sex anyway (either by taking out to dinner, buying her something nice, etc). Some marriages may eventually fall into this scenario after years, but it's probably not the ideal vision of marriage that the public thinks of.

Answer 4

The word obey sounds like it came from men wanting power. Therefore, it doesn't really sit well with me. Marriage as legal prostitution...well marriage is a man-made institution centered around control of society, not a natural state of human behavior. Wouldn't it be wonderful to just enjoy a relationship based on sharing your freedom and independence with someone special? Notwithstanding, I'd like to try to not pass judgment on others and just live and let live. Some people need rules to cope and if it works for them, then different strokes, right?

Answer 5

I don't think that marriage is legalized prostitution at all & I think the word obey should stay in the marriage vows.

Answer 6

I thought the word obey HAD been removed from the wedding vows. I made sure that I didn't have it in mine.

Marriage is NO legalized prostution. ewwwwwww thats grose

Answer 7

Stanton was full of it, of course. As for the primary question, it's strictly up to the participants. Wife wanted it in to show that she trusted my judgment, and in an entity with more than one person, there should be one person who is in charge. This seemed reasonable to me. (Eight years later, we are doing fine.)

Answer 8

Most weddings that I have been to have left obey out.

And prostitutes aren't expected to do housework for free - so no, I don't think that was exactly right.

Answer 9

have you ever watched "Say absolute to the gown?" they have dozens of girls on it who're procuring finished out wedding ceremony robes to short white outfits and sheaths for vow renewals! additionally, who cares what human beings say!

Answer 10

I want my wife to listen and consider what I have to say, but blind obedience would be counter-productive. Two heads can make a better decision than one. I would not have married my wife if I didn't trust her judgement.