I came out to my parents as gay, and they were okay about it, I mean I wasnt kicked out of the house or anything, but they allways keep saying you dont know if this is how you truley feel, I am getting very agravated about it, any suggestions on how to tell them that this is who I am and I know it for sure?
2006-11-21 17:37:08 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
They are probably saying it's ok because it's politically correct and they don't know what else to say. Personally, I believe it's a sin and would have told you so. Then i would have told you to make your own decisions, but don't expect me to agree with it. I'd always love you as my son and not say anything more unless you asked.
I don't think one's sexual choices are all there is to who a person is. I bet you have a hobby and things you are good at, things you like to do. There is more to you than your choice in sexuality. Bring those things out in the open and let your relationship with them be about the non-controversial aspects of who you are.
Allow them their feelings. Just as you have a right to yours, they have a right to theirs. You can't make them agree with your choice. It's good that they love you enough to allow you to make it.
Best Wishes,
Sue
2006-11-21 17:52:44 · answer #1 · answered by newbiegranny 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well Cool Dude, this is just part of the process your parents are going through. You need to try to be patient with them. I can say honestly when my son came out not long ago that I felt alot of things. He came out of the closet and I went into one. I didn't want anyone to know. Then I would ask him, "Are you sure?" His Father was abit more descriptive than me. He asked him, "Well do you like p&**y or do you like d*&k!" It is something that we just couldn't wrap our minds around. Long story short, we went to a PFLAG meeting and it has taken awhile for us to go through grieving,,yes as parents we do that, it is part of that process I was telling you about. Then his Father and I came out of the closet, and are now advocates for our gay son. So, all I can say is to love them, and accept them, and give them time. What I would suggest is what one of the other gentlemen here did also, PFLAG meetings. I know for some they barely make it to the parking lot and not into the meeting..yes I know I was one of those people too. But you have to realize that there are many steps to this process. And they love you, they truely do, they just need time is all. I would suggest that you possibly attend a PFLAG meeting with them. Believe me in the future they will be also marching with you in the Pride Parade too holding their signs! Smile So Sweetie I am sending you a website from PFLAG. Read the material and ask them to send you some for home, leave it in the bathroom for reading and then your parents won't feel so alone or what their feeling is not normal because it is, normal. And I wish you the very best, your a very lucky man to have parents accept and love you.
2006-11-21 18:01:10 · answer #2 · answered by ncamedtech 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are trying to accept the fact that you are gay but at the same time also wish you will be straight.Give them times,never do anything like bringing someone to sleep over.It will give them a worse impression on gays than the society already gave them.
You are hoping for your parents approval on this matter,you just need to wait,show them that this is how you truly feel and you won't give up your identity but don't rush into anything harsh for them.At least they didn't kick you out,they are still considering it.
Good Luck
2006-11-21 18:17:07 · answer #3 · answered by Janet Y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm guessing you're a teenager still. If that's so, your parents will pretty much second guess most of your feelings for the next couple of years no matter what they are. Comes with the territory of growing up and discovering who you are. About all you can really do is be true to yourself, stay safe, and let them see that this is something that's not changing.
(If you're not a teenager anymore... well, most likely your parents will treat you like you still are until you're out on your own anyway.)
2006-11-21 18:14:23 · answer #4 · answered by angiekaos 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents are telling you that you don't know if this is how you truly feel because they have always thought of you as being straight since you were born. They have thought of you meeting the right girl and having grandchildren. I don't know how old you are, but that is how many years that your parents just assumed that you were straight. This is new to them, so give them some time to get used to it. Instead of being aggravated about them, be thankful that they are being OK about it. You have parents that are more understanding than most people have.
2006-11-21 17:57:20 · answer #5 · answered by χριστοφορος ▽ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate that we do this to our friends and family. We struggle with our identity forever...sometimes for years. Then we finally decide to tell them and are shocked when they aren't instantly down at the PFLAG meeting leading cheers.
Love them, respect them and be honest with them. They love you and they will come around.
2006-11-21 17:47:27 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont bring a guy home, yet. Its denial big time, dont shove yr gayness to their faces. Give them time, just talk about who yr dating ect. Eventually they'll would like to meet yr guy.
2006-11-21 17:48:57 · answer #7 · answered by zuegma1977 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they r in denial. just give them time, they will understand. bring a guy home then they will get it.
2006-11-21 17:42:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋