I love my wife with all my heart just the way she is but she is a smoker and diabetic. I think she needs to lose the weight because im afraid of what it might do to her health. How can i bring this up without hurting her feelings?
2006-11-21 11:48:41 · 30 answers · asked by Ronnie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Join a gym with her. You need to motivate her in a positive way, not say "Honey you're fat!" thats only going to make her feel worse than she already does, and she will probably end up gaining more weight. You should start working out and coax her to join you. Also start buy healthier food, or ask her to start cooking healthier things.
2006-11-21 11:53:30 · answer #1 · answered by Smart Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way to do things is to improve them together. Suggest joining a gym together, learning how to cook different things, and just going on walks at night together just to be more active. In order for her to lose weight, you are going to have to change your lifestyle as well. As for the smoking and diabetes, these are obviously serious conversations you need to have with your wife and let her know how scared and worried you are about her health. My wife and I had to make a lot of changes recently in order to be more healthy, but I believe since we did it together it happened.
2006-11-21 11:55:10 · answer #2 · answered by Just another 2D character online 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to do it together. Cut out the junk in the house. Learn how to cook healthier meals. Tell her that the families health is a priority to you and that you want both of you to be as healthy as possible. Start taking walks together or join a local Y. Tell her how important she is to you. Don't tell her she needs to lose weight that will only make her defensive.
2006-11-21 11:56:10 · answer #3 · answered by kellykelly79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When health is involved you flat out say it. Say I don't care if you lose a ton of weight but lets try to get healthy together. TOGETHER is key. Tell her you will support her by doing it with her. By becoming more active she will lose weight and get in better shape ,health etc. Diabetes is very serious...my friend is a diabetic, drinks smokes etc. She is blind in one eye, can't have children, and her kidneys are failing. She is not even 30. Its sad and scary.
2006-11-21 12:31:00 · answer #4 · answered by E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By encouraging a lifestyle change in which you participate too. Suggest walks, that is more innocuous than suddenly running off to Gold's gym (at first.) Do some of the food prep, with healthier meals. If nothing works though, and she is truly overweight, you may have to be more direct. I work for a vascular surgery practice and a great many of our patients are overweight diabetics. We treat them for non healing wounds, diabetic ulcers, carotid and perphial vascular disease, and sadly in many cases, my docs have to perform amputations of diseased limbs. You are right to be concerned, and I hope your wife can understand she just has a good man who cares.
2006-11-21 11:59:55 · answer #5 · answered by trishopesisters 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ask her to lose weight, instead of asking her do this.....
When ur wife around, Always said to her that YOU wanna lose some weight (even you dont need it) in time, she'll look at your body and her body to balance it.
She'll catch your point.
Pointing directly can hurt ppl feelings, Try talk in circle/round speech or set some example and don't make her feel you're talking about her. Just talk about your friends problems or cousin.
Hope this works to you.
2006-11-21 11:58:21 · answer #6 · answered by peter71 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
overweight,smoker,and a diabetic?....first and foremost she needs to have an up-to-date physical!!!! exercise, dependent on her over-all health could cause more harm than good...secondly, do your homework..if she agrees to have a physical and she gets the go ahead to exercise have something in mind to suggest to her..it is important to find something that "she" will enjoy..The "gym" is a great idea, but , she might not feel comfortable with the whole gym scene..simple things like; walking a dog, hiking in the park, eating healthy, watching less t.v. will do "wonders"!!! Be prepared to take a physical with her, i think that it will be a great start to showing her that you care and that you are willing to make this journey together... good luck...
2006-11-21 12:15:28 · answer #7 · answered by michael m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you smoke? If so, quit. It will be easier for her to quit if you do too. If you don't then it will be a little harder. If you really want to help her, start looking into what kinds of foods she should and shouldn't be eating, and go to the grocery store with her. Suggest healthier alternatives and foods that would be good for both of you.
Talk seriously about how both of you need to get healthier because you want kids or need to be there for the kids or need to be a good example for the kids or something. If you don't have/want kids, you'll have to think of something else.
Just be honest and include yourself into the whole plan.
Start out with, "I really need to go on a diet, but I don't think I could do it if you weren't there to help me and be on it with me." and "I think we should start by quitting smoking."
2006-11-21 12:02:14 · answer #8 · answered by toothfairy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest, tell her what you told us, that you love her so much, you are worried about her health. Tell her you want to grow old with her. Tell her you will support her anyway she wants you to. Do NOT tell her that you think she's fat or that she should lose weight. It's much less offensive if you focus on her health instead of her weight.
2006-11-21 11:59:56 · answer #9 · answered by dawn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At first, maybe don't say anything out right.Just keep making suggestions to go for a walk, talk the stairs instead, park farther away. If she doesn't want to get active may then (if possible) mention YOU feel you need to loose a few pounds, if she bites then make a suggestion you both try to get more healthy.
2006-11-21 11:53:11 · answer #10 · answered by jj2000 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋