Age difference?

Question

Is it wrong for a 22 year old and 34 year old man to date. He has two children and she has none. How do you think her family would feel about? her brother are both younger then him. ? HMMMMM

Answer 1

As a real answer and not an advertisement, I say:

Some questions for you:
1) Do you want to be the mother of someone else's children?
2) Are you ok with the fact that you may never have your own children?
3) Do your friends like him?
4) Are your parents going to flip?
5) Would your grandmother approve?
6) Is he in good health? (Poor health + age makes the wee willy a bit shy)
7) Is he going to support you in the future (ie degrees, work, etc.)?
8) How long have you been together?
9) Do you fight often? Have you fought at all yet?
10) If your friend was dating a man 12 year her senior, would question her sanity?

I dated a man who was literally twice my age. He had a son, who didn't live with him. I loved him dearly, but he was also an alcoholic, and refused to support me in my endeavors. I told my friends, and they all immediately wondered about my sanity. I never told my parents, and though they guessed I had a boyfriend, I never told them his age. 12 years difference isn't as bad as 24, and I kinda like men in their 30's. My friend is marrying a guy who is a good 10 years older than her, but then, she's 36. My other friend married a guy who was maybe 8 or 9 years older. If the chemistry is right, and you are deal with his kids, tell the world. Otherwise, I would still keep it on the DL until you are absolutely sure that this is the one.

Answer 2

Four part question:
1. No I don't think it is wrong for them to date. They must have things in common for the relationship to continue and age is not a determining force.
2. Who has kids is not relevant in dating. It may be relevant later when the relationship reaches a point of commitment together as if they would want children and that is their decision. Right now you just said dating.
3. Her family should be supportive if that is who she cares to date assuming she is a responsible young lady.
4. I don't understand the brother statement, so he's younger?

Answer 3

Age is only a number, however in this circumstance it would be best to encourage this girl to date men her own age. This man has already been married and has 2 children. She is just beginning her life and is probably still trying to figure out what she wants in a relationship. They are at 2 totally different points in their lives, it would be hard for her to come in and try to raise 2 children not ever having the experience of having her own kids if they decide to further the relationship. Many, many things to think about, but she is a grown adult and will therefore make the decision that is best for her....even if you may not like it.

Answer 4

I was 23 and married a man that was 36, so no, I don't think that there is a problem with the age difference. As long as you as a person can accept the age difference and the children and the possiblity that he may or may not want more children. Just make sure that you guys have a lot in common and a connection, if he makes you happy, your family should be happy for you to find such a man. It is hard to find men that will make us happy and treat us right.

-EA

Answer 5

Maturity has a lot more to do with it than chronological age. My husband and I are 10yrs apart in age - he is older - and we've been together 16yrs. He is older than ALL of my siblings (I'm the baby). My family was a bit wary at first, as I was 23 at the time we met. I had one child and he had 2. We worked it out, and our relationship was much better for each other than my previous marriage (in which the age difference was only 2 yrs). It really really just depends on the people involved. If it's working well, everyone else will celebrate with them.

Answer 6

I have always been with men much older than myself. I find them to be more mature and willing to accept responsibility. I don't see any problem with it as long as SHE is over 21. I doubt, however, that her family will see it that way. They will foresee a difficult life for her with a divorced man with two children already. They will think that he is likely to divorce a second time. They may argue that if he has to pay child support for two chi8ldren already, it will mean that she has to work and they will be chronically short on money.

Frankly, I think they could be very happy.

Answer 7

Twelve years is not a big deal, what does his children think about him seeing a younger woman?, her family would object but they always do, if both man and woman are willing to give it a try then they should without any outside interference.

Answer 8

I married a man 18 years older than me when I was 19. I am still married to him and it has been over 16 years. It does work when they both are interested in making it work.

Answer 9

Chica, I am a 35 year old woman, dating a 54 year old man. Married, no less! His kids are my age! But only one of them knows. She just wants her dad to be happy, even if it's not with her mom. My parents do not understand it, but you, like me, are a grown woman, and are fully functional, and capable of making decisions for yourself. And no, people do not mistake him for my father. If he makes you happy, and his kids are accepting of you, then GO FOR IT!!! You only live once. Maybe in the future, I'll find myself a younger guy, and have fun all over again!

Answer 10

Go ask them my god will they freak out if you just ask them. If you are really liking this older man just make sure that he doesn't only date younger women like say only 20-25 year olds cuz odds are once you get to old so will his attraction for you.