Its hard for me at times to wake up in the morning and except that i was a victum to most event and once i get throught one another happens i feel dirty, guilty and shameful like it was my fault but i know its not at times.
2006-11-21 06:55:29 · 7 answers · asked by melony f 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You might need to talk to some one professionally. Of course you are going those ways, you were violated. But talking does help, always remember that you are the victim, the person who did this to you should be the one who feels shameful, and dirty. Hold you head high, maybe take some self defense classes, not necessarily to learn how to defend your self, but to help you gain self confidence!
I hope this helped!
2006-11-21 07:06:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Melony what you are feeling is a normal reaction to a horrible event. But you are not to blame. You are not responsible nor can you control another person's behaviour. You don't say how long ago this happened and if it happened one time or is still happening. Your question sounds like it may be happening over and over again, just when you're starting to get over the last time. Is that right? Sweety if this is still happening to you then there are ways to stop it. Please call a transition house (Women's Shelter) in your area (you can phone collect to most of them or ask the operator for their toll free number). A transition house can help you make a plan to keep yourself safe (and your children if you have them). They won't charge you anything and will NOT judge you! If this is no longer happening to you, a transition house can still help you with some counselling to help you heal. They are there to help you explore what options you have, to work with you to come up with a safety plan, to give you support and sometimes a hug from workers who really do give a damn. They will not put pressure on you to leave your relationship or to involve the police, but they will help you to understand what ALL of your options are and will respect and support you through this. I can give you more information and/or support if you want to e-mail me.
2006-11-21 16:07:56 · answer #2 · answered by zenobia2525 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure can, I never felt bad about myself after I was victimized, I realize that I'm in the minority on that one, and I don't know why I should feel any different than most people who have endured these violations. Maybe I was a stronger person to begin with when I was the victim, I really don't know. It could also be the fact that I know that my perpetrator went to jail. I have visible scars along with invisible scars and every time I see the visible ones it makes feel so glad to be alive. It makes me feel stronger to see what I have overcome. I wish you peace and happiness and a good life.
2006-11-21 16:37:46 · answer #3 · answered by sexmagnet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know what you mean and i understand where your coming from..lots of people tell you that it will get better over time and in a sense it does, but not everything will be the same as i am sure you know. I'm not saying to blame yourself for what happened i am saying the opposite...use your experience to grow stronger, help others. know that you are not the only one who has had to go through these emotions and that sadly there will be many others who will be looking for answers as well. help them. I'm not saying that everything is going to come into focus right away..I'm still coping and it has been 8 years..its not something that can be fixed by someone else. you have to except that it happened and come to terms with it..till then nothing anybody says is going to help you.
2006-11-21 15:52:01 · answer #4 · answered by Makdaddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie im so sorry and NO its not your fault! You are NOT dirty nor should you feel ashamed. I am also a victim of sexual abuse and want to tell you that it does get better. I promise. Listen to positive music and read inspirational books.... chicken soup books helped me..... and yes take a self defence class so the next time a bastard tries that you will be ready!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-11-21 15:12:28 · answer #5 · answered by Earls Gurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember....the past does not equal the future. You can use this experience to actually make you a stronger person. Try listening to a motivational progam like Tony Robbins. God Bless... and may the Force be with you!
2006-11-21 15:05:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I knew what to say to you to make you feel better.
Don't hold any of this against yourself. Know that you are your own person, and respect your self. Hope you feel better.
2006-11-21 15:04:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋