Any ideas on how to control a rowdy teen?

Question

I have a 15 year old girl that is out of control. She is disrespectful to me and here other siblings and is not willing to help with anything around the house or school. I am a single mom and I would like her help. Any ideas on how to rein her in?

Answer 1

you are not going to get any good answers online. honstly people saying to use tazers? call the girls and boys town hot line, they are trained pros who give great advice. the 24/7 hotline is 1-800-448-3000.

Answer 2

Yeah, I've got an idea.


First get your priorities straight.

Make a chart on everyones good points and their bad, include yourself in this chart. (If you dont control this teen the younger ones might get crazy also)

Map out everyones schedule and every ones friends. Make a chore list and assign something to everyone. TAKE AWAY all privileges until you see at least two weeks improvement on every ones part.
Dont take no for an answer.
Spend a couple hours as a family on the weekends.
Get her a job BUT watch how she spends her money.

She will feel like she has more freedom yet she will also no Mom is not kidding around. The moment she steps out of line, stop her dead in her tracks. Put all her stuff in storage and bury the key in your garden or something.

Until grades are up. House is cleaner and attitudes are pleasant.

Stay on top of their stuff. Have a meeting with her teachers to see if they cant e-mail you a weekly summary of her progress and behaviors. Dont tell her about that part.

Answer 3

Since she has siblings, she might be acting out for attention. No matter how old you get, it never hurts to have someone care for you. You could try to make it so you have quality time with just her. You can maybe take some time to go shopping, or taking a hike with her. Somewhere where it would involve the two of you talking. You can slowly let her know that you appreciate her time, as you bound, you can gradually give her responsibilities.
What might also help is if you happen to have a positive male role model whom you both trust talk to her(uncle, older cousin, family friend) in a non confrontational way. You don't want to scare her or guilt her into doing anything. You want to help guide her into adulthood, and the responsiblilties that come with it.

Answer 4

Sometimes,as a single parent, we are forced to work and leave our children on their own for far too long. This all in the name of being a good providing parent. I was your 15 year old. I was going out with boys that were slightly older than I was and I was partying very much. You have to try and reign her in with simple stuff. No phone--no freedom--you know the basic stuff. This all might be lost on her but it's worth a shot.
Does she have any hopes of getting her driver's license? If she does let her know that it is a privilege...and if she doesn't start acting a bit more kind to her family then she doesn't get to use the privilege.
Also, try to explain to her that the way she is treating her family is abusive and you just won't tolerate it. You work too hard and in no way are you going to let her abuse and bully every one in the family. Let her know that she has no right to behave so recklessly and as far as school goes....this is her future freedom. Take her (unannounced) to a food closet and let her dish food out to people who really are less fortunate.
The thing with your daughter (same for most kids) she thinks she has it so bad...life is rough..show her what it is to struggle. She has no idea what it means because you are taking care of everything for her. She is of age to be a very productive member of your family and hr duties include school and chores.
I know all of this is much easier said than done...I wish you the best of luck..I know this must be hard.
Can you take any days off of work...maybe you can go to school with her. She would probably be mortified but hey she will know you are not messing around!!
Keep in mind that some day she will be a wonderful person!!
Every decision you make should be based on how this will affect her later on!!

Answer 5

Take away her allowance, cell phone, hangout time, and computer time. Why? Because teens get rebellous reinforcement from friends. Dont do her dishes, laundry, or clean her room. If she leaves her things around through it out.Then get on her about school work accept nothing less than "A"s. Do not break down!! Show her if she wants nice things in life she has to work for them. Soon she will want a car, make her a deal you'll pay half if she pays the other. Why? Because this shows your child your not evil but you are firm and causes her to get a job and work for somthing not just get it handed to her. You will be surprized how well this works.

Answer 6

Hello! I have a 15 year old also, the difference is she went through this at 13. I spent many days trying to figure out where my sweet child went. I had to sit down with her and tell her that I didn't speak to her this way and she was not going to talk to me this way. I also took her for a visit to the doctor to rule out any problems, she had a hormonal imbalance. Once they corrected the hormones she became more reasonable. Not saying that the meds fixed all the problems, but they sure helped. I also started going to church with her and spending extra time giving driving lessons and other small things. She once again became my friend instead of my enemy. We still have some difficult times but we try to talk to each other more honestly to find the solution. I think that once she realized that I was trying to help her instead of control her life she realized that she didn't have all the answers. Good luck, I will pray for you and her.

Answer 7

Boy would I love to know that too! Mine is 13 and has the absolute worst attitude. I take her cell phone away and her tv. I told her the next thing I was going to take away was her makeup b/c she doesn't need to be wearing it anyway. She's doing better as far as helping out and keeping her room clean but it is a constant battle and her smarta** attitude is about to make me blow my lid. I have 4 kids. They each get an allowance provided they behave and keep their rooms clean. I think she is getting tired of seeing her younger siblings get $$ and her not get any. $$ talks, BS walks. I never believed in spanking but she makes me rethink that sometimes
Good luck Let me know if you get any better ideas!

Answer 8

I used to work at a correctional facility and sometimes parents would get permission from the sheriff for their kids to tour the jail and speak with the inmates so they can see how their life will end up if they don't straighten themselves out. If this doesn't work you need to seek the help of a juvenile judge that can maybe send your teen to some type of boot camp.
Note: Have you tried taking things away and grounding from activities that he/she enjoys. Good Luck.

Answer 9

I'm 17 and was wildly out of control from the age of 13 til last year. The best thing you can to is hold yopur ground and do everything in your power to prevent your kid from making bad choices. I'm am so greatful my parents did that.

Answer 10

Oh, bless your heart! I'm going thru something similar with our 11 year old son, but his father knows exactly how to fix his attitude problem when it arises. I, on the other hand, am a push-over because he knows all he has to do is give me a hug and a kiss and I'll forgive him for just about anything! I don't have any advise, but you've got my sympathy and prayers! God bless!

Answer 11

Well, I was like that when I was that age and I always got spanked. However, it actually didn't do much of anything to me as I would become resentful and more rebelious even to the point of running away at 17. So maybe you should take away some of her stuff and see how she responds.