opposite attracts? or similar attracts?

Question

from your marriage exprience. what cause marriage to be more excited and live longer, opposite personalities or similar personalities?

Answer 1

my husband and I are day and night. It works out for a perfect balance. The trick is learning to accept the other person's differences, which takes a while....

Answer 2

Actually, it is not easy to generalize that way. What I would say is compatible attitudes or frequency matches attract. In a marriage, what is more important is compatibility - physical, and emotional. How much one can give without expecting anything back in return and how much one would try to understand the other is what causes marriage to live longer. And if the partner is not a stickler to routine and mundane things, and has an adventurous mind or atleast a mind open to doing different things, that would make marriage more exciting. I know a couple of friends who have opposite personalities and have a wonderful marriage. The same holds for people with similar personalities. The vice versa is also possible. Since it is two humans involved, the variables are many and so one solution cannot fit all.

Answer 3

My immediate answer would be opposites because I have always thought that's what my husband and I are and we have been married 25 years and are more in love than ever, but we are similar on one thing, we have the same faith.
Having an opposite is great because they can be and do things you can't and you will never be bored...angry, disappointed and embarrassed at times, maybe, but not bored. How ever if I am totally honest the longer you are married the more you become alike, and even swap traits sometimes..you become like one person. I know both successful and non successful marriages with either combination.
On serious reflection I think as long as there is communication, forgiveness and commitment to each other, and the realization that Love is something you choose to do then your marriage will last whether you are alike or opposite.

Answer 4

In my oppinion, opposites attract is a bunch of BS.
Yes, they sometimes attract, and then when they get to know each other it's miserable. Things can be helped if both are willing to work on it, but it's so much easier when there are a lot of similarities... and I'm not talking about marrying a clone of yourself, but still, someone with whom you do have a lot in common.
To me things like nightowl vs morning person, outdoors type vs indoors type, frugal vs spendthrift, parenting styles...etc. These are differences that might really make it a drag to relate to your spouse, and it definitelly would be better to have similarities in this area instead of having to constantly compromise. Then both are miserable.

Answer 5

You can have opposite personalities, but if you don't have similar goals in life or if you don't have the same values, it will never work. So personality really doesn't matter as long as you can get along with the other person. My husband and I are completely opposite as far as personality and hobbies go, but we strive for the same things in life.

Answer 6

I have been undecided in my life about that all myth until I met my husband and got married.. Why do I say this.. Well.. I used to be attracted to major buttholes that treated me like crap and I am by far the same.. I am a girl with a huge heart that would do anything to please a man.. As far as similars attract.. I would highly suggest that you look into mates with similar interests.. My husband hates/dislikes every kind of hobby/passion I have in my life besides playing sports.. It really limits us when it comes to doing fun things together that we both enjoy.. I was much more satisfied in my relationships when we had a whole lot in common versus one thing in common! hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck on your search!!!

Answer 7

In magnetic field applications opposites attracting is great in human relationships is nothing but constant arguing and fighting over who is going or not going to do what and who controls the other.Similiars personalities are bad too if they are both selfish and self centered and stubborn.Now if they are both loving kind hearted patient understanding puts the other first then chances are theyll get along especially if they are honest with theirselves and each other and are willing to work on their faults.Someone asked me "wouldnt it be boring if both were alike?"You mean to tell me if you had the same morlas,religious beliefs enjoyed the same things and doing them with that person youd get bored?Itd be like having your best friend over all the time and better!It sure beats fighting and divorce.

Answer 8

Different personalities are great..you find things in each other that are very exciting..the problems lie when things that are critically important to one of you is of no importance to the other...in my example...my personality requires a lot of things to be in there place.i.e. the house being kept up to a reasonable level...my wife could care less...and YES I do help out a ton around the house and with the kids while working a ton and she is a stay at home mom............

Answer 9

I believe a mate with the same kind of goals, plans, or desires. Someone who do the things you do, like to do the things you do, and want to do the things you do.
Opposites I don't think will last to long once you settle down. (Now this is just my opinion!) At the beginning of a relationship, people do things because they like the person and wants to get to know them. ( My Opinion!!)
If you like watching the game and your partner doesn't, but wants to spend some time with you during the game...than what? I think that people need to like the same things!

Answer 10

I'd have to say simular, because I was married 3 times in less than 10 years, and I'm telling you right now, we did NOT have simular personalities!!

I feel you have to have simular so the interest level in hobbies, get togethers, travel, life styles all intertwine some how. Why want to spend the rest of your life with someone who doesn't get your jokes, or your humor, or likes what you wear, or what your hobbies are?? WHY? Life is much more fun when you can spend it with ones who really get into what you do.

Answer 11

In my case, it's opposites attract. I've been with my husband for 11 years and we are like night and day. Sometimes it makes life interesting, but a lot of the time it just makes our relationship a struggle.