what do most people do when they want to share custody. my husband and i do not get along we need to divorce. but we both want to be with our kids. what options will the state offer? what do most people do?
2006-11-21 03:19:01 · 10 answers · asked by goodtalkin' 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My ex and I have 50/50. It works out great the way we do it. Only a suggestion. If it is my week I have them sun, mon, tues,thurs and he has them on wed. If it is his week he has them sun, mon, tues, thurs and I have them on wed. I keep the kids every friday night and bring them to him on sat at 6:00p.m. He keeps them every Saturday night. The wednesday only breaks up the week for the kids and me and their dad. I can't stand to go a whole week without seeing my kids and their dad feels the same way. The kids love this idea so that they don't have to go a whole week without seeing us either. I would suggest that you and your soon to be ex work it out yourselves. I know our schedule may be weird but we do live kind of close. Only about a 12 minute drive. They go to the same school no matter which house they are in. I have enough clothes for them at my house and same goes for their dad so they are not always tugging stuff back and forth. It works out really well. And no matter how much you and your soon to be ex may hate each other (if you do) make it a point to get along. That is what is best for the kids.
2006-11-21 06:23:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are both agreeing on what you want, courts will most likely go with whatever the two of you decide as they would prefer that the parents make the choices on how to raise their kids and love it when the parents get along. If you are not in agreement however, customary is joint custody with physical placement with the mother. Father's usually get every other weekend and one over night during the week. Holidays are again whatever can be agreed upon, if you cannot, the courts usually split them equally. If you will live in different school districts, again another thing to discuss. Whoever has physical placement will be the one to receive child support. If it is going to be a fight, it is best to get a lawyer, and not one appointed to you from the courts. I have found, though it can be difficult to pay for a lawyer, the lawyer fights much harder for you and your children's rights when you are the one paying them and not the courts. I'm guessing if you are divorcing because you don't get along, you will fight over custody. Be smart, get a lawyer to get the best situation for your kids. Also if your kids are older, they can decide who they want to live with.
2006-11-21 03:39:52 · answer #2 · answered by Elvira 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as a fashion to grant stability for the toddler or infants there is oftentimes some form of help order in place except between the two considered one of you ... you additionally could make your very own contract. in case you're saying that your ex makes waaaaay extra suitable than you do, and that your ex thinks that having the toddler 50% of the time skill that he's doing his share, then I doubt in case you will have an contract. Who seems after the toddler's scientific? Who seems after determining to purchase clothing for the toddler? Who determines how the toddler does his homework? Who determines what faith the toddler participates in? Who determines what occurs to the toddler and the place he will stay if he will become ill? except the two mothers and dads agree on each little thing there could be a usual Custodian and then a Partial Custodian in spite of if the toddler is chop up between the two properties at the same time as issues are going nicely.i could propose that in the time of lieu of an contract somebody report for help and then paintings out an contract with a custody association. (BTW - the 50/50 chop up will end working while the toddler will become older and has extra acquaintances close to a minimum of one place of living than the different - except you the two stay blocks aside.)
2016-11-25 22:47:43 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most courts will NOT agree to 50/50 custody, since every 6 months the children's living arrangement changes, meaning uprooting them from schools, social functions, sports. It is never the best idea for them. Shared legal custody is what most courts give. Physical and legal custody for one parent and visitation and shared legal custody is what all the couples I know have been offered.
2006-11-21 03:31:03 · answer #4 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that considering the question is a good start.
Children need both mom and dad as parents. Neither is better than the other (in general) and each brings certain strengths and weaknesses to the table.
Living close together, is a good start, in the same town, same school district.
There are several parenting plans out there, such as week on, week off where each of you has your child for 7 days at a time, alternating holidays.
I think considering the question puts you and your child miles ahead of those who have a bitter divorce.
Thanks.
2006-11-21 03:23:49 · answer #5 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my parents divorced, I lived with mom and would see dad on the weekends, some holidays, summer vacations.
If you can offer up an option, they will probably more than likely agree to it since you both talked it over.
Just try and be civil to each other while you are around your kids.
2006-11-21 03:24:03 · answer #6 · answered by kitt_kattkitt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i went thru a bad divorce and my ex and i really don't get along, but we try for our daughters sake. you need to put aside any hatred you 2 have for each other and put the kids first. even thou the courts will you tell you when you can see the kids, as long as you don't cause any problems and the courts don't know, then you can play by your own rules. i wish you the best
2006-11-21 03:31:58 · answer #7 · answered by bone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you need a good lawyer....and you will have to pay for the courts to decide....that's if you and your husband disagrees with who gets the kids.....If your husband wants the kids 50/50.....you will be entitled to support if he makes more than you......
In any case there would be a battle if he want the kids.....the lawyers have to work it out for you..........
Good Luck to you!!
2006-11-21 03:49:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most do one parent during the school week, the other on the weekends, swapping holidays and summer sharing
2006-11-21 03:21:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it really helps if you live close for school and things. but my parents used to do my father had my brother and i tuesdays thursdays and every other weekend. as far as holidays they would just share us, since my mothers family tends to eat much earlier in the day we would go there first and my fathers second.
2006-11-21 03:27:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋