I am a christian and I do not believe in getting a divorce except for marital infidelity, but I am so sick of my husband! We haven't had any intimacy in several days because it is hunting season and he is too wrapped up in either hunting or learning taxidermy. By the time the kids are in bed, he is too tired and wants to sleep before going to work on 3rds (He is supposed to sleep during the day while I am at work). We need to move because our house is too small and I find the perfect one that we should go look at b/c it is in our price range and just what we want, but he isn't even interested because it isn't up his dad's a**! I am so sick of his family, living within 1 mile of his grandparents, his dad, his brother, his sister, his uncle and living an hour away from any of my family. If I say anything about hunting or his family...it's just a big ole fight and I get accused of bitching all the time. His family has lied about me, talked behind my back, and put me down to him.
2006-11-21 02:57:13 · 28 answers · asked by ltlchk_2 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't know what to do or how to have a good relationship with him. I just want to feel special and loved. I would never cheat, but sometimes I think about finding someone else just to feel loved, just to feel cared about. Any ideas on how to have a great marriage?
2006-11-21 02:59:50 · update #1
We ALL get sick of our spouses. I myself...get sick of my husband at least 2 or 3 times a week! He TOO is ridiculous about hunting and when the season comes around...I suck it up...why?....because I knew he loved hunting before I married him and asking him to stop now wouldn't be fair. As for your husbands family...yup...same here....but they are not YOUR family so there is nothing you can do about it. If he believed everything his family said about you...would he still be with you?? Try not to drive a wedge between him and his family because the only wedge you'll be creating is between you and your husband. It seems like you both need to compromise. You want one thing...he wants its another way. Time to find a happy medium. The only way this can be accomplished is if you sit down and talk...have someone watch the kids and you guys go for a cup of coffee or dinner....make an agreement not to YELL, call NAMES or put each others opinions or ideas down. Come to a conclusion somewhere in the middle.
2006-11-21 03:29:58 · answer #1 · answered by Miloree 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Marriage is tough. Sounds like you need some time apart. Go stay with a relative for a month or two and see what that brings. Take some time to figure out why you are so insecure. I say you are insecure because Hunting season is not year round and it will be over soon. Now sex can be an issue when two people work different shifts. Pardon the expression but one is coming as the other is going. You maybe need to designate some time, that is if you don't take my first suggestion and get away, where you set aside one day that is meant just for the two of you. Maybe every Thursday you have dinner date and work on why you are growing apart. One thing is for sure, it is easy to point to what is wrong with him, but I am kinda wondering what you are bringing to the table. A Christian probably would have worded the question without all the vindictiveness that you seem to have for your hubby. I don't know, but attitude goes a long way with men. You had to know when you moved into your current house that you were living close to his family. They shouldn't even factor in your marriage but sometimes family can be nosy. So what to do. Start with yourself and find out if there is anything you can do to improve as a Christian. Maybe ask him for one night a week to just be together. And if all else fails, go spend some time with a relative and get yourself together and see if it brings a change in him. Probably will be embarrassing to him when his family sees that his wife left him. But don't do it if you plan on being vindictive, that will get you know where.
2006-11-21 03:16:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just because your christian does not mean you can't get a divorce. I have met a lot of christians who have gotten a divorce. You should start thinking about yourself. Well first of all you should talk to him seriously with out arguing. Just talk and see what goes on from there. Tell him how your feeling and tell him you have your needs too. If he still doesn't listen then maybe you just need to leave him. You don't need him telling you anything and especially not his family. Try talking to your mom. Mom's always know what to do. Sometimes you just have to tell your mom some stuff not all of it like the intimacy part, not unless your comfortable in telling her that. Hope you luck.
2006-11-21 03:04:36 · answer #3 · answered by shy_gal2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should get a divorce. You are not happy and its best for you and your kids. He is being selfish, when you get marry and form a family, you have a new family to think off. If the house its too small its better for the kids to move, not because his family its close he is going to put his kids thru that. And what about your family, why not move in the middle. I think you should talk to him and if you guys cant fix the problems move on, you dont want to be unhappy and let the kids watch all that
2006-11-21 03:58:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, this is somewhat annoying....what a terrible issue you're in. You of course can not stay in an abusive marriage, no be counted what the placement. I understand you probably nonetheless look after him and don't prefer to leave him on my own, inspite of the undeniable fact that on the comparable time you could not be his punching bag or venting bag I ought to assert. jointly as I do have self assurance in ailment & in well being, i do no longer accept as true with abusing a companion. i might recommend getting counceling for you, a nurse to flow to him and divorce. He won't understand because of the fact maximum abusers do no longer see their movements as incorrect, yet who is familiar with how plenty worse he gets now that he's injured/ill. be careful.
2016-10-17 08:10:07 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being Christian is believing in Jesus (accepted him as your Lord and saviour), wait on his promises, living in faith and loving others, it is just a positive way of life. When you got married the blessing was the God is with you both because you became "one". But if your spouse is not doing his part it is very hard to live and let live. Honestly I have been divorced once too, and yes we had a daughter. But let me tell you, it was the best thing that happened to me, my wife now is the best partner, friend and lover, pretty much the best thing that ever happened to me. Yes it did take personal sacrifice, pain and other things but in the end I am still Christian she converted to Christianity and we are now a family of Six and happier than ever.
Blessings to you.
2006-11-21 04:20:59 · answer #6 · answered by jnd01 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I Feel That You Should Spend Some Time With Our Maker, And Tell Him How You Feel, And Ask Him To Guide You And Also Ask For Spiritual Wisdom And Understanding. Ask God To Remove Whatever It Is That Is Making You Angry, And Pray Alot.In Time When Things Dont Go Right ;We Should Pray All The More.
2006-11-21 03:33:14 · answer #7 · answered by dorothy u 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wasted many years of my life living in a situation very much like yours. In-laws, uncaring husband, etc. Believe me, if you aren't happy you should get a divorce. It will only get worse over time. Every day that goes by is a day lost from your life that you will NEVER get back. Life is short, you should be happy and enjoy it.
The day my divorce was final was the happiest day for me!!!!! I have NEVER regretted it, only wondered why I didn't do it sooner.
2006-11-21 03:05:21 · answer #8 · answered by I know, I know!!!! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to sit down and tell him what's going on inside of you. Don't get divorse because this isn't the solution. Try not to argue. This kinds of problems happen in almost every marrage and it doesn't have a happy ending because people don't know how to handle it. People don't sit down and talk with their husband or wife. Trust me, talking is better. If you think well, you're gonna resolve the problem. I hope that I get to hear good news from you. ^_^
2006-11-21 03:08:36 · answer #9 · answered by Roxy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you both need some good ole communication.
Perhaps some counseling would help to start the lines of communication going. You need to let him know how you feel, before you start acting on the emotions that are evidently brewing within you.
2006-11-21 03:04:07 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋