Here's the deal, I used to be considered a "butch lesbian" and even then, I'd be afraid to approach girls, because I was attracted to other butch lesbians and for some reason, that tends to be a "taboo" in the lesbian world apparently.
Now, I am a female-to-male transsexual and I'm STILL afraid to approach girls. I know it's common for the guy to flirt with the girl, buy her a drink ect, but I can't seem to get over this fear. I have lots of girls I talk to in my classes, as friends, ect, but I can't get up the courage to flirt with a girl or hit on her. I don't even know if I know how, and I'm REALLY afraid to try to flirt with a straight girl, but as a male now, trying to hit on a lesbian doesn't seem like it's gonna work. So what should I do to get over this?
I know it sounds funny, but girls intimidate me.
2006-11-21 01:58:59 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Being male doesn't make flirting with women any easier. If you thought it would, I'm sorry.
I'm bi, and have had a hard time with shyness my whole life - with women and men.
For me, I do best around people I've known for a while. Almost every relationship I've had, started with someone I knew and had been around for some time. I've never been good at meeting or picking up people. Some of us just don't have that type of personality.
As far as who you wish to try and hook up with, that's a little more of a problem. Lesbians aren't gonna be attracted to a guy (even FtM) and many straight women are gonna have a hard time until you have all the surgerys (and we both know the poor state of FtM surgerys, at this point in time). Right now, bi women are your best bet. Most aren't butch. I can empathize though, I find butch women very attractive.
My last boyfriend was FtM. I wish you luck.
2006-11-21 02:18:33 · answer #1 · answered by Radagast97 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should relax. Your boyfriend isn't going to stop thinking that other girls are hot, any more than you are going to stop thinking Brad Pitt or whoever is hot just because you are together. It's natural and human and doesn't go away just because you've picked someone. You probably tell your friends that they look hot in their outfits (when they do); why deny him the same right? Don't kill the relationship with jealousy. This is a teeny thing. It's not even a thing. She looked hot in the picture, and he said so. Done. It's nothing. Tell him you're a little upset about it if that's the way you feel, and hopefully he'll consider those feelings in the future. But if you're not going to allow him to have friends, you'll strangle the relationship with jealousy.
2016-05-22 06:29:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a straight guy and I also have a real hard time "hitting" on girls. I usually just become friends with them and after a while there might be a good moment to see if things can go further.
But I think girls are actually expecting to be hit on and have experience saying no. So it's not a huge deal to them to gently turn someone down or accept the offer. I think we are assuming way too much trauma in the exchange that isn't actually there.
2006-11-21 02:02:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I used to have a hard time but then it just got easier. Now I flirt with everybody, boys and girls alike... lol
Plus.. a smile works wonders. Sometimes you don't have to say a word.
2006-11-22 00:42:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well Ive gone to ur 360 page 4 reasons that i won't say here we kinda have the same problem may be u could e-mail me or I'm me and may be we might come up w/ a coarse of action 4 the both of us .
2006-11-21 10:55:33 · answer #5 · answered by djonecat@yahoo.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, life is too short to sit around and wonder what would happen...just live life and do it, who knows you might get something good...even if you dont, ur mind will be at rest and you'll regain ir confidence..
2006-11-21 10:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by innocence 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋