I was w/ my boyfriend for nearly three years. We have had a few problems as w/ any other couple. The problem is, he talked about getting engaged for months. I always wanted it to happen but, his mother who is terminally ill cannot stand me because I'm only 20, and even now when she is dying she has told her son who is 33, that she will withdraw him from her will if he marries me. So I dunno what's going on but it's like now we have to meet in secret. However, the other day, we got married but are still living apart so his mom and sisters won't find out. Now he is telling me maybe it was a mistake and is thinking about getting it anulled. I am pissed to the limit as now there is even a possibility that I'm pregnant. What is going on???
2006-11-21 01:46:36 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i am very sorry to hear that. But you have to be patient. Keep your baby, and try to keep your marriage. He needs to stand up to his mother but it may not happen because she is ill, sit tight and be patient. Give him time to think
2006-11-21 01:49:25 · answer #1 · answered by krystal c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first problem is not the mother. The first problem is that he thinks he made a mistake and wants to get an anulment. You need to ask him If he 1.) Loves you fully 2.) Wants to Stay Married to you. If thats is all 100% Yes & True, then just be patient. Not to sound mean or anything, but the Mother will fade away soon, You guys will get your Money, and you can move on. Just pretend it is a long Dist relationship. If you are guys are in love the way a married couple should be. Then it should not be hard at all. Especially with Cell phones & Emails. You may want to hold off on the baby, till a few days later, you don't want to seem like your making stuff up, or trying to "Trap" him. You want it to be a Happy time. I know the whole deal may sound shady, but you guys have been shady since day two it seems. Sneaking around, secretly dating, fornicating, and eloping.
2006-11-21 02:03:26 · answer #2 · answered by Gyasi M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that he is married and the old lady story is BS. If you are his wife, there is no reason for him to hide you, If his mother is real ill, then wait until she dies, but honestly, I think that your man is giving you a pile of BS.
Ask for a divorce and take him to the cleaners honey, if he gets an annulement you get nothing and you will be stuck with his child. See if there any provisions about pregnancy and anullment. In MO a pregnant woman connot divorce until the baby is born.
If you are not pregnant, then conult a lawyer and grant him a divorce, but ask for alimony first.
Check on you local cour house, what is the window of oportunity for an anulmment. Depending of the state, a marriage can only be annuled within a month.
Don;t go down with out a fight swetie, he is such a scum bag.
Good .uck
2006-11-21 01:57:01 · answer #3 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on, are you really all that suprised? Why would you secretly run off to marry if you knew it was his mothers wishes for you two not to marry? Why didn't you wait tell she kicked the bucket?
IS he or was he keeping this all secret because he does have alot to gain from her death? Maybe it was his was of trying to shut you up for a bit and thought by doing the unspeakable, he married you in secret.
Running off to marry in secret, and now a possibility of a baby? Let's all hope your not pregnant. You weren't mature enough to get married let alone now be a mother.
2006-11-21 01:53:46 · answer #4 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all he would have a hell of a time getting the marriage annulled.
You worry about you, and the possibility of having a child. He sounds like he is a mom ma's boy, who is greedy enough to give up everything for the money.
Do you deserve that crap? Come on!
If you are pregnant then you take care of your child, and establish paternity.
Mommy's boy who sees green bucks isn't going to grow up. You ready to take Mommy's place?
2006-11-21 02:01:49 · answer #5 · answered by LucyLinnae M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me guess, Ashley...he is probably her only son, right? This same kinda thing happened to me once, though I never got married or talked about it. When a young girl comes into the pic. she is automatically gonna say..."GOLDDIGGER!!" That's just the way the wind blows whether it's true or not. And she will never like you. He sounds like a Mama's boy. They are always the biggest mindchangers. He is probably just feeling guilty about it and feels like he betrayed his mother. Don't blame yourself. He is older, he should've known better than to leap into things like this. I hope things will turn out good for you!
2006-11-21 02:02:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let me say first that i am sorry for what you are going through but if you want to know what is going on even though his mom is sick then why don't you go and ask her why she don't like you .and let her know how you feel for her son she will have more respect for you if you ask and not put him in the middle of it and if she just don't like you then just let him do what he needs to till she is better and then both of you can figure it out from their.
2006-11-21 01:58:04 · answer #7 · answered by missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably his mom thinks you only want him for his money that hes getting when she dies and to her she probably thinks your way to young for him so while she is still alive she is still there to stop him from dating you or anyone she doesnt like.Sorry you have to hide your marriage to save her the aggravation... good luck to you and your husband.
2006-11-21 01:57:46 · answer #8 · answered by Damzel in distrust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not really an ultimatum. He controls his life, and you should've realized that and NOT married him. Doesnt sound as tho he's able to make a commitmant.......OR a decision.
Good Luck. You will need it! ;(
2006-11-21 02:07:34 · answer #9 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guilt...he loves you but doesn't want to disappoint his mom
2006-11-21 01:51:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋