What Should I Do About This?

Question

I actually have two Thanksgiving related questions that I would appreciate any advice on. It's fact that I am moving out right before Christmas but how am I gonna deal w/ this in the meantime? My sister, her husband and kids are coming over for Thanksgiving and staying a week or more, the prob. is we don't get along at all. The main reason is kinda silly but two years ago when I was 16, (she's my half sis. so let me point that out), she has a cousin who was my age and she kinda hooked us up, we went out for awhile but sadly I ended up leaving him for an older guy..(who I am w/ now.) Ever since then my sis. and I have not gotten along at all, and everytime she comes up we get into terrible fights. The other prob. I have which I go through every year, is that I am a vegetarian, I won't eat turkey so everyone thinks that I must be anorexic or something and my sis. is always throwing that up every year, when she knows it is simply b/c I'm Vegan. Should I go on vacation until she leaves?

Someone just asked why would I invite her over?
I guess I forgot to add I still live w/ my parents but I'm moving out right before Christmas.

Yes. Talk about being Immature? I'm 18, she's 30! What are the odds?

Answer 1

I would. Who needs the shi t. Why put yourself through all that crap. Let it all blow over and save all that stress. Just go and have a good time.

Answer 2

The holidays are stressful enough without the added stress of family issues. The best I can suggest is to forgive your sister in your heart for past hurts, you don't have to forgive her to her face, just in your heart is good enough and then smile in the face of adversity. Try to remember that if you had stayed with the guy that she hooked you up with, you probably would not be as happy as you are now. You can not allow yourself to feel bad for a relationship that didn't work out just because it makes someone else unhappy.

As for the vegan thing, perhaps she is jealous that you have the courage to stick by your values/morals, even on a holiday that traditionally calls for eating turkey. Being a vegan does not make you anorexic, but eating turkey to satisfy your sister and keep the peace, will make you horribly sick and simply isn't worth it.

Try to keep the peace by remembering all the things you have to be thankful for; i.e., a sister who argues with you in the first place. Not everyone has family to share this holiday with and would gladly trade places with you. Perhaps you can dig out old photos of good times past and guide any discussions about your lifestyle choices onto a happier subject. For example; when your sister starts to talk about your vegan choice, say, "oh, remember that time...." and be sure to make the topic something that is funny, and that everyone can share in.

Good luck and happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!

Answer 3

The vegan issue is your business,if this is your life style tell everyone to back off...As far as your sister goes,have you tried to explain to her why things didn't work out? If not,try talking to her about it...If so, then there is another problem there...Take her on the side (preferably away from everyone) some place you can talk without interuptions and try an iron this out...This seems to petty to be carrying a grudge for 2 years...Happy Thanksgiving..Good luck

Answer 4

Make a promise to yourself that you are going to get along with your sister this year.

You're going to be a vegetarian for the rest of your life. People who are not vegetarian will always be curious and uninformed about your choice.

Don't sweat the small stuff, enjoy your holidays.

Answer 5

That is your house so i think you shouldn't go anywhere to make anyone feel better. The choice is theirs and if they won't mature up and act like regular visitors they shouldn't be the ones at your house if they don't get along with you. If your imature sister throws that in your face just egnore her and maybe she will feel silly for even bringing up the subject. Its not her decision if you chose to be a veg.. she is the one with the problem and has to mature up,,,,,,not you.

Answer 6

its a tricky situation but i think you should corner her, sit her down, and have a long talk. tell her that you dont want to fight (unless you do) and you just want to have a nice thanksgiving . also explain to her the whole vegan matter. she may be treating you this way because you might of said or done somthing hurtful without noticing. or she could be jealous of somthing you have that she dosent and maby she sees that you are shoving it in her face or somthing. the best thing to do in my opinion is talk ,ask ,explain. its what i would do :) wish you luck on the whole thing

Answer 7

she is your family and i think you to need to talk if you are ever going to become friend ever again. My mom and i had to work it out alot when she did not come to my wife and i wedding.. but after a year she and i started talking and thing got better now we are ok and moving on in each other life's.. and that the way it is.. good luck.. ooh and just tell them your Vegan and bring your own meal to dinner..

Answer 8

we all have those family members that we would rather not be around but why ruin everyone else's thanksgiving because you two can't get along...just try and grin and bear it and try to be the bigger person. the two of you really should sit down and talk though life is too short to hang on to such resentment!

Answer 9

Why would you invite someone into your house that truly doesnt respect you. I dont care if it is your sister, mother, father that is your house and you have to right not to put up with her crap. If she treats you like this you might want to have dinner somewhere else and let her go home afterwards. My sister wouldnt be able to come until she knew how to act. That is childish and that is how I would treat her until she grew up.

Answer 10

DOn't let her ruin your Thanksgiving. Tell her you appreciate her "fixing" you up with her cousin, but it didn't work out..no hard feelings (on your part anyway). The other part to your question...about the turkey...tell her it's your choice not to eat meat...... your life is yours and she should respect your decisions...if she can't don't waste time worrying about it.