2006-11-21 00:42:39 · 23 answers · asked by Dawn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he says he wantys to be single because he doesn't want the responsiblity of a wife and family.
2006-11-21 00:47:42 · update #1
Sorry, but my thoughts are, if he wants out, let him go. "fighting" to keep someone will only push them further away. Nothing is worse than feeling like someone is trying to keep an emotional stranglehold on you.
2006-11-21 00:47:26 · answer #1 · answered by Squirrley Temple 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is sad. And he realised that only after marrying you ? The question is, do you want to live with a man who does not want to take any responsibility of you, and the children you may have ? He sounds like a very irresponsible, not-serious-in-life, and most of all, he does not seem to love you at all.
Do not cling on to him, fall all over him, desperate for him not to go. Be calm, be strong, and then waht you could do in this situation is find out why he wants to be single ''again'', and why did he marry you in the first place, when he knows marriage is marriage, wife, kids and all. Thats it. No one here, would be able to tell you how to stop fighting or how to hold back someone who does not love you anymore. And consider yourself lucky that he told you now. If you did have children (I assume you dont, cos' you have not mentioned in your question), and then he left you at a later stage in life for you to handle everything on your own, you would be lost, and I am sure the question you put here would have sounded different then.
Move on. Show him you can live, at least live without getting involved with someone who does not respect you, or the relationship he shares with you. Let him be single, and you got to find your own ways too. If thats what he wants, and if you are fighting over this again and again, you'd really be drained out emotionally at some point of time. I am sure all this you already know in some corner of your heart, but you are doing your best to deny that, and accept the fact that he does not love you as much. Accept that first, there can not be a relationship as a husband and wife, with no love, no responsibility to each other, and finally getting the children to suffer for it.
Move on, is all i can say. Its sad though, I am sure you did spend a considerable amount of time with him before and after marriage, no matter how less it may look like,......i am sure you will look at this in a different perspective, from his point of view, and you will really detest such a person, and I just hope you come out of it and save your dignity and self respect, by not begging him on ur knees not to leave u.
Sorry, it sounds cruel, but take care, and be strong. good luck
2006-11-21 01:00:00 · answer #2 · answered by arya 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't want responsibility???? WTF!!! I have news for him, divorce does not allieve you of responsibility of your children! Responsibility for a wife, what is that? I have a wife, I don't know what my responsibility is to her other than to love her with all my being. Is that it? Really, I'd love to post a few paragraphs on this, but ultimately, you two need to sit down like adults and have a nice long conversation on what everyone is feeling, what happened, and what everyone's needs are. If he has any feelings for you whatsoever, this can be saved and become a springboard by vaulting your relationship to higher levels. BUT, if he just won't cooperate, you have no choice....you have to move on. If that is the case, just take your time and choose wisely. I think every longterm relationship goes through this at some point. How you two deal with it and grow from it makes all the difference. Good luck!
2006-11-21 01:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by adtmatt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It hurts real bad this month, It only hurts the second month and the third month you feel the room you have in your bed. The 4th month you are going out with new friends the fifth month you rearrange the furniture. The 6th month you are getting in shape, the seventh month you know he is gone and you feel the weight lifted the 8th month rolls around and it is time to no longer be sad he is gone and feel the great relief that you had felt in the 6th and 7 th month. Now it is the 9th month that is the time to have a baby and you are so grateful that he didn't walk out and leave you with a child. Now it is month 10. Look around you Dear no need to mourn and lose sleep over this guy as by now you know it is his loss. It is month 11 so go ahead enjoy the Holidays because it is time to plan a Vacation. Get out meet people because Mr Right is there for you. Let your eyes travel it will happen. Blessings
2016-03-12 21:01:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't stop him from leaving or thinking he's 19 years old again but he still has a responsibility to you and his kids. Get a good lawyer who will help you with this. More women fight to keep a dead marriage alive when they should be protecting their assets.
2006-11-21 00:52:03 · answer #5 · answered by Debra D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as you try to make it work, he will rebel even more because he's already made up his mind. Both of you should sit down and decide where your relationship is going from here on. Why fight when he no longers value your relationship...HE WANTS TO BE SINGLE! Give him a chance to talk and decide from there. Good luck hun!
2006-11-21 02:00:50 · answer #6 · answered by pangfvlx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know that saying "it takes two to tango'? Sadly, it takes two - both of you to make a marraige. If your husband truly wants to be single, then there is very little you can do to change that. If he is hedging, then finding out why he is unhappy can be a step in the right direction. Finding out, however, is so much easier said than done, he may not know why, just how he feels. A good marraige counsellor can do wonders.
I wish you well.
2006-11-21 00:50:43 · answer #7 · answered by I_Love_Life! 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Actually, he has met someone he wants to fling with. Then in a year he will want to come back. Tell him to go and you start to act single as well. Make sure that you drop off the kids at his house at least two weekends a month. If he won' take them, drop them off at his mother's.
2006-11-21 01:09:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that if wants to act like he is single to go ahead but you are too. Let him know that you can and will go out with other guys and have sex with them and you don't give a damn who he beds because he is already doing it.
2006-11-21 01:54:19 · answer #9 · answered by unionjack07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he wants to be single than what is in it for u in the future. he is someone who runs from responsibility and would not make a good choice for your future. there is no way to fight this,he doesn't see marriage as what he wants in life. if u could get him to agree to go to counciling it might help. he doesn't want all the things that go with marriage, he doesn't want to be responsible for u, plus he mostlikely wants to date others and cheat. he doesn't like his role in life. your not responsible for the changes, and it is impossibble for one mate to infleuence the other. seems he doesn't really care, and he is just into meeting his own selfish needs. he wants to play but not be responsible for anything.
2006-11-21 05:27:14 · answer #10 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋