suggestions for a 15 year old runaway?

Question

i have a 15 year old that has been a runaway for the past year. now she is pregnant, and wants to come back home with the 17 year old boyfriend. i'm not going to let the boyfriend move in. how do i keep my daughter at home and follow my rules without her running off again

Answer 1

thats a Tough one
What ever you do, shes your daughter, always love and respect her, no matter what, she needs you

Peace

Answer 2

I'm glad your daughter has come home safe and sound. It's not the best situation but what goes on from here on out is very important as not only your daughter and her future is on the line but your grandchild as well.

Talk to her, tell her you are glad she is alive and back. But don't allow her to manipulate you with threats of running away again.
I think you both should seek counseling. There are probably reasons she ran away other than just not wanting to follow your rules. These underlying issues are still there and underneath the surface. Both of you need to come to terms with them so you can move forward. Pick out the therapist together. This way she won't feel you are trying to control her. The therapist can also assist you with establishing a household with rules you can both live with.

I think the boyfriend shouldn't move in either. But I also wouldn't want the father of my grandchild out on the street. So that is going to be a tough situation to deal with. Is there a safe local teen shelter he can go to?

I think getting her to see a doctor is first priority then see if she can take her GED or perhaps continue her education another way. Look into non profit organizations that help in this area. One for young teen mothers might be able to help her get an education and decide what to do about her baby.

Answer 3

You need to seek counseling for her and your family. There is a reason why she has resorted to being a runaway and gotten pregnant. There are boundaries that haven't been instilled in her and it's a little late in the game to start without the help of a professional. If they only came with manuals and some sort of idea on their personality type when you took them home from the hospital...unfortunately, they don't and we can feel like we failed them and ourselves but it can be mended and they can change. You can't do what you have done in the past because it obviously didn't work for her but you can get some outside help and prospective. Good luck.

Answer 4

HELP, Look, I know where she is coming from. I quit high school, ran away when I was 17, because of awful family problems and barely made ends meet as I had absolutely NO money in savings or anything. I finally sucked up my pride and went back home, got a job, got my ged, and by the time I was 20, I had enough money left in savings to get my own place and so on. Tell her that he can't move in, unless you want major problems. Tell her the only way she can come back is if she gets a part time job. Say it's either that, or you and your guy friend will have to move in together and work out things on your own. He sounds like a freeloader, if he wants to move in w/ yall. He is old enough to get a job.

Answer 5

Well you're doing right by not letting the boyfriend move in,the only thing that I can suggest is you keep a close eye on her and be as strict as hell on her,no matter how she doesn't like it. And when that baby comes here,let her feel every bit of what it is like to raise a child,don't make it easy for her.When she start realizing how it will put a dent in her social life when she wants to hang out with her friends,that will probably make her never want to go out and make the same mistake.And I would make sure that the boy who got her pregnant pay child support.If she wants to return to school,by all means,support it but always make sure she knows that being a parent is no picnic.

Answer 6

i am in your situation even though im not a parent but my sister has ran away atleast 3 or 4 times and shes been gone since sunday shes got a mind of her own. every teenage girl should have a mind for theirselfs like think twice before they have sex and get pregnant. and think twice if its good to runaway or not. you just lay down the law and confront her you just dont want her 17 year old boyfriend to move in, and which by the way is a little too old for a 15 year old girl to have as a boyfriend.

Answer 7

I was a15 year old pregnant runaway, once I got pregnant my mother wanted me to come back home. I did after she agreed to let my boyfriend come too! BUT she did lay down the rules and we abided by them because we wanted to stay together it worked out throughout my pregnancy once I had my daugher I realized he was a jerk and wanted him to leave he, refused our argument awoke my mother who then came out her rm into mine and, told him" it's time for you to go I only allowed you to stay for my daughter now she's asking you to go". He left My daughter was 3mos. then she's now 8yrs old we never got back together, both married and still care for our daughter on a 50/50 bases So what ever you do just know that she'll make her own mind up anyways, for this long she thinks she knows it all let her have her way when that baby comes reality will set in then you'll have your's for now think of it as getting two kids off the streets and in a safe place.Good Luck.

Answer 8

Well sadly to say, you can't prevent her from running off again unless you take her to court. Let her know that she is welcome to stay and you will support her but you will not allow the boyfriend to stay.

You can take her to court and to ensure she doesn't run away again, they can set up documents stating that if she does NOT stay at home and follow all rules she will lose her baby, which can be given to you, and she will not have visitation rights. They will set up ALL rules for you such as early curfew, school grades, a job, etc. Every last detail, the court can regulate.

If the courts set up documents, and she runs away she will be put in juvenile hall. She and the unborn will be taken care of well. But when the baby is born the baby will either be given to you or someone else (depending on the documents).

Answer 9

I got pregnant when I turned 15 and was always running away before that, once I got pregnant I stoped running away and just stayed home because I knew that it was time to grow up...I was going to be a mom. Give her a chance, if she is going to have this baby treat her like a grown up, but support her by showing her how to be a good mom. Let her know that if she plans on keeping this baby that she needs to provide it with sability, and show her that your are going to teach her how. Good luck

Answer 10

i was a 14 year old runaway{and am now 34 with 5 live daughters but could have been 11} and when i asked my mum if i could come home and she said no i got pregnate and she still would not let me live their and she never accepted the dad and i honestly beleive that you have to let the father in with her monitor their relationship but you have to give her the benefit of making her own judgement with the father of her child she will work it out sooner under your guidance but if you seperate her from her responsibility she will only act out and may just keep getting pregnate or something far worse!!you have to give to get so let him in!!he is the dad!!your giving the boy a ticket to being a deserter!!

Answer 11

Other than communication and comming to a mutual agreement you can't prevent her from leaving again. Accept the posibility if you do not allow her boyfriend to live at your place she may never come back. Also you can not and should not attempt to cut your grandchilds father completely out of the picture as he will always be your grandchilds father.