should I leave my girlfriend for HER own good?

Question

We have been together for about 5 years. we got married about 3 months ago, I know this is bad to have cold feet after the wedding but...about a year ago I did some some bad things, I got into drugs and ended up cheating on her....a couple of times. but she had the heart to take me back and sober me up. the problem is that I still kindof want to do drugs on a recreational basis and I find i still have a wondering eye sometimes and think, is there something better. should I leave her and let her find someone better than I? I have told her she sould leave me but she dosent want to. she says she loves me and I do love her too.

Answer 1

if you really love her, then why do you still have a wandering eye? this girl sounds like she's good for you, and what if you don't find anything better?

i think you should re-evaluate why you love this girl, and what it is that you really want out of life.

Answer 2

Well, it is an accomplishment for you to talk to her about this, but I think that in all fairness to her, if you don't think that you are going to be able to stay drug free or cheat on her, then she deserves to be able to move on and find someone that may treat her better. I mean what happens if you something happens and she gets pregnant then there is going to be another worry and this is not a stable marriage to begin with. I know you love each other but you need more time to find yourself and figure out what is more important to you in life. Let her go and be happy and she will be happy again.

Answer 3

I feel she deserves better but that is MY opinion. Apparently, she feels differently. You have a good woman in your hands. Too good for you. And you really have no clue what you have, do you? She took you back, despite all that you've done, because she believes in upholding her marriage vows. Unfortunately she gave it to the wrong person who doesn't deserve it. I just wish she would wake up one day and realize what a fool she is because you don't seem to be making an effort to change your ways.

Answer 4

I think you should leave her, sorry. You sound like you still have some isues and maybe she does too. However, if you want to do drugs and cheat on her you should leave and give her the chance to be happy.

Answer 5

If you love her too, why not for the sake of the love you have for her change your desire for drugs and other vices that will not make happy. Personally, I feel marriage works out well when both parties show understanding for each other's feelings.

Answer 6

sounds kind of like you want her to not be there so you can go out and do drugs and have other women, then when you're done with all that, you know what you're going to do? You're going to want her back.
I know this, because my boyfriend did this to me. not with other girls, but drugs and drinking. I helped sober him up, but he'll get an urge, dump me, feed his desires then come running back saying he's sorry and never do it again.
and you know that when you're all done having your fun, you're going to miss her in the morning.
I suggest you stop thinking about drugs all together. do something else with your mind, find something else you like that you can do in your spare time to take your mind off of things.
you know I was a heavy, heavy drinker, and about a year ago I just stopped. I stopped cold. Now, if I even have one drink, I feel sick to my stomach. I have percieved it to be posion, so that's the way I feel if I drink. I feel like I just drank posion, so therefore I get sick, and stop drinking.
It's all a mind trick, your will power and mind power. you just have to trick yourself in a way like I did.
I knew this guy, he was a very high powered doctor, very rich. got into coke. ended up doing more and more everyday. soon, he was spending all his money on it. not only did he shot a dealer for ripping him off, he got 10 yrs in prison, lost his home, his wife, his kids, and had no money left.
People who do things like this, know that it's bad for them. you know right from wrong! you are a grown man. you're married for god sakes. stop acting like a child, grow up and get yourself together. You know what to do, and that's to stop thinking about it! give it up, is it something you want to do for the rest of your life?

Answer 7

sounds like you are unsure if this is what you want but really it sounds like you are trying to let the "drug you " con you out of what you got going on for you. dont listen to that crave. it is an escape. sometimes people who mess with drugs end up with a lot of guilt and this unresolved guilt ends up taking them back out to useing. get your self into a support group. pherhaps take your wife with you;or go to alanon with her.
sounds like you are doing some self sabatoge behavior which always leads you back to using.


if you need time and she is willing then get a seperation til you know what time it really is.

Answer 8

You love her??? honestly? if you did then you would be thankful she has stuck by your side in hard times when nobody else would...i can already tell you by experience... if you leave her and pursue your drugs and messing around with girls sooner or later your gonna miss her and realize that you shouldn't have left her but by then it will be to late...so its up to you take that road of drugs and girls and regret it bad or stick by your wife's side and end up living a rewarding life!

Answer 9

u want her to leave u because u really don't want to give up drugs, or give up other women. if u really loved her u would try harder, get some therapy, but u don't want help u want only to satisfy your own needs. u feel trapped in your marriage, and u want to go back to what is familiar to u, your old way of life.

Answer 10

If you love each other then you need to work on it, but you need to go to counseling for the drugs and the wondering eyes. If you really love her you'll do everything you can to change.