It drives me crazy that my husband does not help around the house...will he ever change?

Question

We work opposite shifts and I am pregnant right now, and have a 2 year old...how do I get him to understand that I need his help?

I should add that he works his butt off at work, getting only every other sunday off. and to just_jds point..I did spoil him in the first place...but shouldn't we be spoiled too? Idon't ever deny him that he works hard but I do too. I love him and he is a great man and father so I guess I should shut my yap and count my blessings

????? EL package---have you talked to her about? My sister is a stay at home mom and I get on her...she should put in an 8 hour work day at home and have dinner ready..that is your job description if you are a stay at home mom....being able to be home is a blessing!!

Answer 1

He won't change unless he is somehow forced to change. If he feels housework is woman's work, then let him know you are quitting your job because supporting the family is men's work!
Or, you could just go on strike, quit cooking for him, washing his clothes, making his side of the bed, you never know, he might get the hint!
My husband did. He actually asked me to find him some socks!
I just told him that he is a big boy and he probably needed to wash them. (I was feeding my newborn at the time)
He washed his clothes! It can work, he just needs to know that you really need help. You need to tell him.
My grandmother told me just before I got married..."The more you do for a man, the more he expects you to do. He will take you for granted. He will not appreciate it over time and if you don't do it, he will probably get mad. Never do too much!!"
She was married over 50 years, and I just celebrated my 25th just two weeks ago. I followed her advice. Marriage is a partnership, it takes two to make it work, no matter what the task is!
Good luck, and take it easy....remember, with children, your house will never really be "spotlessly clean", but you can clean it really good when the kids grow up and move out. Then there will be plenty of time.

Answer 2

Did he ever help before? If yes - ask him what changed? If not - well - then you have to change a habit - takes 21 days i hear. Have a sit down chat with TV off and no food in front of him. Just tell him u need more help. But be specific - "I need your help" isn't enough. tell him what you need him to do - and be sure that its feasible - if dude can't cook - have him work the vacuum and washing machine. And tell him you will be reminding - remember 21 days to change a habit.

Answer 3

I work about 60 hours a week and I do a lot of the house keeping...my wife is a stay at home mom (3 kids in school)...I do at least of the housework...now tell me that is not bullllllllllll

Answer 4

some men just will not do this thing called house work. they think it is a women's job and it is not for them to help out at all. i have just learn to deal with it because it is better than argument. and i am the one who spoiled him in the first place. so good lick getting any help from your man. you can try and explain that all this and work is just too much on you but they know most of us women are wonder woman!

Answer 5

Tell him to get off his as*. You have more than enough to take care of with having a 2 year old and being pregnant you dont need to be taking care of EVERYTHING. He can do his share around the house. Let him know this

Answer 6

don't settle for good enough you deserve more family that work together stay together. talk to him when both of you iare in a good mood and telll him am sure he will understand and do a little. but start with the small chor like hunny can pick up the trash plx. you know the little chor around the house.

Answer 7

With all due admire, specific, i think of you have a challenge whilst you're using those around you loopy. My room would not ought to be rearranged except i'm shifting some new super piece of fixtures in or out of it. that occurs possibly as quickly as a 12 months. except there is a few dramatic replace on your room or artwork section, i do now not in all probability see any ought to alter it. via definition that technically IS OCD. Obsessive compulsive affliction has now not something to do with being prepared or anal. that's a affliction in which you carry out an action to counter a persisting intrusive theory revolving around that action. all of us are obsessive compulsive in some way or yet another to various stages. working example i'm for my section obsessive compulsive with reference to stapling pages collectively... they continually ought to be completely aligned in any different case i'm going to undo the staples and reapply them. some human beings ought to save their finger nails short. human beings flow nuts over smudges or smears on glass surfaces. You of course experience forced to manage issues once you alter into familiar with them for a definite length of time. the two tell your husband and coworkers to tackle it or get psychiatric help.

Answer 8

naw marriage is always 50/50.never any less if he aint puttin in his fair share no matter what he makes you need to tell him and make him put some effort into it.your pregnant and he should be helping you anyways and you shouldnt be doing all the work.im not saying that you shouldnt stay active but he needs to help you out during this time.tell him to get off his keester and help you out.he helped you get pregnat now he can help you with the stuff you need help with!

Answer 9

Tell the lazy b-a-s-t-a -r-d to get off his a-s-s and help! Its his house and his baby coming too! You let him know that you're not his momma and if you don't get his help, then he has two choices.

a. Get you help? Hire somebody to help you. Or;
b. Get ready to meet your lawyer. You're not going to put up with his inconsiderate and lazy attitude!

TX Guy

PS: If you cannot stand up to him and assert your rights, then get use to him taking advantage of you and don't come crying to us on Yahoo. Its your choice, now do something!

Answer 10

You can't change anyone...especially men.

congrats on the new addition!