Why do some people tell you what you are feeling because of a certain situation that happened?

Question

Just because if it happened to them, They know that is how they would feel. They think that is how I would feel as well. Its like they are adding words to my life that aren't even true. How do you deal with people like these?

Answer 1

Don't listen to them. You have your own reactions to situations based on your life experiences which are different to the experiences of others.

You can always politely say that you feel differently. You don't have to give a reason.

Answer 2

Although people go through somewhat the same situations that cause pain society seems to think we do all go through the same exact feelings. But as u say we all don't and no one has the right to assume that my pain is exactly like urs because it isn't and never could be. My pain is my pain and u can't have gone through the same exact thing because it is me that this is happening to and I may or may not be able to handle it the same way u handled it or in the same amount of time. Some of us never stop grieving the events that cause us pain we just hope to grow past them as well we can. Hope u go through whatever u r going through with as much peace as possible is that better for u? God bless.

Answer 3

Many people just want to feel connected and believe that if you feel connected to them it will help you in whatever the situation may be. Just listen, if you can stand it, and remember they are mostly trying to help you. After they are done, you can decide what to do with what they said. Forget about it if it wasn't in any way helpful to you. Let them know how you feel about the situation. Maybe a different perspective could help them and talking about it could help you.

Answer 4

Maybe they think you're having trouble identifying your own feelings and they're trying to get you to understand what you feel and they're doing the best they can.

If they say, "you're angry because of that thing that happened!" it's your job to say, "well, I'm not so much angry, as sad..." or whatever. They're trying to communicate with you. You have to help them understand you. If you aren't in a frame of mind to do that when they're analyzing you, you have to learn to ask them to back off and give you time to understand yourself. I find it also helps to let people know I need help understanding, and that throwing labels at me makes the process more difficult.

Answer 5

Experienced this before. You can try to find out your facts to the situation, and find out their facts that make them think the way they did. that's what someone told me. present what you know or feel calmly, and politely to that person, and explain clearly why you feel differently(you can do it with the help of the facts that you gathered). Tell them in a firm manner that you will think over their advice, consider the pros and cons, make a decision, and not let them force their ideas on you.

Answer 6

Tell them that you appreciate their concern, but that your feelings are your own and that no one understands how anyone else feels because they are not that person. Tell them you just need them to be there for you and they don't need to say anything.

Most people say stupid things because they don't know what to say. let them know they don't have to day anything as long as you know they care.

Best Wishes,

Sue

Answer 7

Usually it's disingenuous, directed, and empty. How much importance does naybody really put in what a flunky has to say anyway. Lies have a stink all their own.

Answer 8

tell them "thanks for sharing your experience with me" and just change the subject or walk away. they should get your drift. if not, be more bold and direct and tell them to mind their own business.