Why do I hate people so much?

Question

I feel stuck in a rut.Before I was wild, loved to party, be social, experience life to the fullest. Im shy now, quiet, uncomfortable in new situations. After I bought a house, and became involved in a serious relationship, all I want to do is stay home. I have very few friends now, and the ones I do have I really dont like. I almost feel like most people lie and act fake, and I see right through them. I have no patience for people like this. I turned my back on most of the people in my life, because I wanted to get rid of all the negative things around me........now here I am lonely and practically friendless. Should I be more accepting of people and their messed up behaviours or should I put my foot down even if that means possibly not having friends and stay true to myself? like I said its kinda lonely here.

Wow im amazed great answers people! I feel 10x better already.

I just wanted to add that i have been feeling desperate for friends latley. When I go out with all my boyfriends male friends (who i love all of them) I always want to have a girlfriend with me, and can never find one to come! I feel pathedic in everyway.

Wow im amazed great answers people! I feel 10x better already.

I just wanted to add that i have been feeling desperate for friends latley. When I go out with all my boyfriends male friends (who i love all of them) I always want to have a girlfriend with me, and can never find one to come! I feel pathedic in everyway.

I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE CANT JUST BE STRAIGHT FORWARD AND HONEST LIKE ME!
those are the type of friends I need

Answer 1

I am alot like you.
I really dont have much desire to go out and party, and sometimes when friends call em up, i avoid their calls or make excuses not to spend time with them.
I feel as though I have out-grown alot of my friends. They still dont have a job, they still take drugs, they are still doing the same boring stuff they were doing 5 years ago.
I really do feel that you need to start finding a new circle of friends- people you have alot in common with.
Having said that, dont COMPLETELY ignore your old friends...you never know when you might need them, or they might need you.

Answer 2

You should probably ask yourself if what you are expecting of people is realistic or not. To be honest, most people are more of an acquaintance than an actual "friend". Women usually have more true friends than men. Is your "serious relationship" having an effect on your thinking? It has always been the thing that most often separates friends as you now have differing interests. I know that I don't hang out with my married friends when their wives are around and my single friends don't usually expect me to bring my wife when we go out. We just don't feel that we can be ourselves. Think about it and see if that is part of it. It does make people act differently.

You mention that you turned your back on most of the people in your life. That probably hurt some of them. Is it a surprise that you are now lonely? Do you think it would be fair of them to say that YOU were being fake before? They would be justified in feeling that way, you know.

Of course you can't live life without friends so you should be more accepting of people's faults. After all, the people you turned your back on will have to to forgive you if you try to mend those friendships. How would you want them to act to you then?

If you are looking for the perfect person you will always be disappointed. Look in the mirror. Is that person without fault?

Answer 3

Always stay true to your self. You are the one that lives with you and you wanted to get away from all the others things and
people because you needed a change.
You will have friends , They will come when the time is right .
Don't go back to things you left for.

Answer 4

I know exactly how you feel, you sound like me the thing is now your mature and you've been there and done that and really dont have to put up with immature people stay true to yourself because if you give in then they will bing you bring you right down and you dont need that you have your life together and they dont so be the higher person and stay away look for another crowd with there head on their shoulders and like you!!!!!

Answer 5

It happens but don't generalize everyone. I like being at home alot but everyone needs friends. You just need to look at what it is you like in people and stop focusing on what is negative about people. You can get all the negative people out of your life but until you deal with the negative in you, you will be alone.

Answer 6

hmm...well in one sense, you have done a good thing. you have rid your life of the people that are fake. but...if you are friends with people you don't really like, then why are they your friends?? perhaps you should be a little more accepting of people, but don't let your guard down against the fakies just to have more friends. you could be passing up on some good friends. and the try to only be friends with people with a little to none amount of fakeness.

Answer 7

Congrats on getting the negativity out of your life! You have to see people as human. Everyone has their own drama. It's up to you to decide on what level you are willing to participate in. It is possible to be friends and not be involved in their drama.

Also, what do other people trigger in you? Perhaps you can be reflective while you have the time to yourself. Good luck!

Answer 8

i said the same thing at work today. i feel the same as you do. my life is just like yours i gave up my friends because of the same thing. and even though i get bored and feel i need friends from time to time i remember how much they make me mad. your relationship should be all that you need.find things you are both interested in and go from there. good luck.

Answer 9

well you should try to accept people as they are and not how you want them to be. in some way you are mad only because you are setteling down. it looks as if you are not ready. you are not accepting the thought of setteling down therefor blaming things on other people. take a deep breath and calm down. all you want right now is what you always had. think about your old memories and decide what you want to do. maybe settiling down is far from your mind as expected.

Answer 10

be yourself, as lonely as it can be id say its better than dealing with garbage and bs'ers. you eventually can find a few good people you can relate to. lol.. just a few. sad but true.