I am with one person, but in love with another. What do I do?
I was having an office romance and it got why out of hand.
When it started, I just thought it would be all fun and games. Now we are in love with each other, but married. We have stopped the romance, but it is difficult not being with her. My heart aches. I did it to myself, but I can't help wanting her. My kids are my life and I don't want to lose them to a divorce. I have messed up, what do I do?
2006-11-20 07:30:17 · 15 answers · asked by Steve Gator 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A married man and woman getting involved in "fun and games" is pretty low.....work on your character. Your family should come first. Too bad and too sad you want something else. Part of being mature and principled is to realize there are a lot of things we can't have. Finding another job is a good start.
2006-11-20 07:43:00 · answer #1 · answered by Raven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people get really excited about having affairs, the secret, the passion, and some other things make you have fun and feel new things, but unfortunetly those are dangerous games, because they can get you very confused an appart form the reality. You can even feel that you are really in love, but most of the time its not real love, it just like an obssesion, wich makes the situation very difficult. In your case, its even harder because you work with that person and have to see her daily. BUT, be logical, be smart, think clear, and think what is more important for you, your family and wife or this girl who you are most phisically involved with? Most of the times the excitment ends when the things can come clear, and then you would have lost what is really valuable and important. Try to act with your head, to follow your mind, and not your sexual desires or your heart. Be strong, you can. And in the future, you will be glad about it and you would have learned that some games, like this one, are really dangerous. Pray, and ask God to give you tha Peace and the Strenght that you need in this moment, He never fails. I would recommend you also to see a therapist, it can help a lot.
God bless u a lot!
2006-11-20 07:40:50 · answer #2 · answered by Shannella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come clean to your current wife. Your heart may ache so much, because it's guilty as well. You might release a huge burdon by telling her, and feel better. But you need to do what is best for your 'family'. Tell your wife, and if she gets a divorce from you, then you can persue this other woman. But who knows, comming clean might strengthen the bond with your current wife, make you love her more than ever, and you could possibly forget about the other woman.
2006-11-20 07:34:30 · answer #3 · answered by MaNdYb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop the affair immediately or you will lose your kids. What is more important to you your kids or your mistress?Sounds like you are in lust, not in love. If you have to quit your job and find something else to do. As long as you are in the same office with this women you are going to have these feelings. You are cheating yourself in the end. Your marriage will be over if your wife finds out. She does not deserve to be treated like this and neither do your kids. Your feelings for this lady will pass. Get out of the relationship now, before it is too late.
2006-11-20 07:47:45 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
except your mistakes and move on. You have to leave her behind because she was a mistake and your kids mean more than any office romance. so though it hurts just move on becuase your kids need you and you might ruin two homes by pursuing this relationship. No matter how bad it hurts. You can ruin so many other lives. Don't do it you rwife already didn't deserve the dishonesty. So let it go to many people are involved.
2006-11-20 07:38:33 · answer #5 · answered by kiki_t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look man first act like a man.........i know it is not good to be in love with another when u have wife but enjoy this love as an affait it is nature's gift to u but don't be caught .......keep side ur that relation and go on..........look history how great kings were keeping great warriors and wife.and u r doomed in 2 women only.common man have spirit and act like a man.....keep the affair without knowing anyone cause in this life love is very costly and short wheteer it is love of women or kid don't afford to loose any of them and i bet soon that new woman will leave u
2006-11-20 07:40:17 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just remember you and her love each other and she is hurting too. Your children need you also. They are more important but you need a real life too.
Things may work out for all of you and your wife . Take it easy and don't get overly anxious to be with your lady friend .
2006-11-20 07:36:26 · answer #7 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe should try a new job where she isn't? if you really love her you always will and it will always ache a little. whether you know it or not though, life will go on and you will feel normal again. just get on with it.
2006-11-20 07:33:02 · answer #8 · answered by L.J. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek counseling, but you know you can't be with her. Chalk it up as a big mistake and the time you used to spend with her-spend it with your kids. They should be your life!
2006-11-20 07:35:21 · answer #9 · answered by Didi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO MATTER HOW MUCH IT HURTS IF WE ARE NOT FOR ANY REASON WITH THE PERSON WE LOVE ITS BECAUSE IT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE. WE ALL HAVE CHOICES IN LIFE AND ITS UP TO U TO DECIDE WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO.
2006-11-20 07:38:09 · answer #10 · answered by PRETTYGIRL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋