My partner and I have been together and cohabitated for two years next month. We've known each other for almost seven years. We have a three year old child together. In the beginning of the year he asked me if I was ready to "take it to the next level" with him. We currently are attending relationship counseling to try and resolve communication problems we've been having. How long should a person wait to see if this guy really wants to take it to the next level before thinking he's just stringing me along?
2006-11-20 04:58:22 · 22 answers · asked by tobornot2b2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
okay everyone has forgotten about the child here! How about finish the counseling first, because we have already established you two have a communication problem. So what if he is just thinking you and him need to finish this first. To make sure the next step does not cave in. Please try to make it work! At least he is going to counseling most guys won't do that! Hope you the best with this
2006-11-20 05:09:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think by attending the counseling(hopefully willingly) he's showing that he cares enough to resolve some issues. Some men won't even do that much. I think it takes a lot of commitment to be willing to do something like that. I would wait until you decide that the issues you have are elevated to where you can live together peacefully, you don't want to subject your child to a bad living environment.
2006-11-20 13:05:10 · answer #2 · answered by hk2424 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well two years and a kid and he wants to marry you.....I say go for it. However, because you are going through counseling, take it slow and pay attention to how well you start to communicate. Becareful not to let your mind rush you into rusing your issues to be resolved. This can cause you to back up and back out instead of taking your time to resolve the issue of communication. I say give it another month and see what happens. And as always with anything, follow God and your heart.
2006-11-20 13:03:55 · answer #3 · answered by Baby J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it is hard to say living together for two years and you have a three year old so if you don't go to the next level soon you are going to be right where you are now? so are you happy now if you are then just go to the next level if not try the counsling and give it a few months and then ask yourself if you think move up or move on.
2006-11-20 13:02:00 · answer #4 · answered by christina c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is the counseling helping? it takes time but if you feel he is not even trying or doesn't take the counseling serious then maybe you should start making arrangements to leave. If you feel that things might slowly be getting better then give it some more time.
2006-11-20 13:06:58 · answer #5 · answered by rottn30 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel like you are being strung along, leave now. Otherwise give him some time (length depends on progress shown---more progress= more time) but no more than a year altogether starting now. The only logical next step is marriage, but no sense rushing into that then getting divorced. Best of luck.
2006-11-20 13:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by afsm666 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both have a three year old together, you are both working on the relationship and he is hinting at marrying you. It doesn't sound like he is stringing you along at all.
I think you need to reflect on yourself and why you want to leave. No matter what you both will have a connection through your child. Don't pin it all on him.
2006-11-20 13:04:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You two had already jumped over that level and started living together and had a child. It should not be a hard decision to get married.
2006-11-20 13:02:45 · answer #8 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say just go with your gut. If you have any reservations at all about being married then don't do it. You also have a child to consider. If the "communication" issues affect her (as well as your) well being (mentally and/or physically) then it is time to move on.
2006-11-20 13:03:23 · answer #9 · answered by Just Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's not a time limit that can be prescribed... like a number.
you have to go with your feelings. if you think you can do better for yourself and your child by leaving the relationship, then do it.
that's he's actually attending counseling with you is a great sign, though.
2006-11-20 13:04:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋