how can i get my little boy (almost 2) off of the breast?!?

Question

my little boy is almost 2, i have managed to stop feeding him during the day but he still wants it before bed and during the night - i was up about 5 times last night. perhaps i should just put him down and leave him to cry? but it breaks my heart! help!!

he has cups of juice etc during the day. how can 2 be too old? it has to be better than a bottle

thanks to those kind people who think i'm not a freak!

Answer 1

OMG I can't believe all this bad advice! And from people who have obviously never nursed a toddler for one day in their life!

First off.....you have NOT nursed him too long. You've done a WONDERFUL thing nursing him this long. You've given him a great start in life and met the recommendations of the WHO and UNICEF that all children should be nursed for at least the first 2 years. You've both received many wonderful advantages because of this relationship. GOOD FOR YOU!

Do you want to completely wean, or are you just worried about cutting out the middle of the night nursings? That's something you might explore.....if there is a balance that can be struck that would meet both your needs.

I'd recommend establishing a bedtime routine. Bath, jammies, story time and nursing for now. Then, you can slowly work on shortening the before bed nursing if you want. Instead of nursing him to sleep, nurse him until he's just drowsy. Keep shortening that session until it's not worth his time anymore or he is going to sleep without it.

Please DO NOT leave him to cry it out. It breaks your heart because it goes against your natural instincts. Have Dad take over some of the night time parenting.....especially those night wakings. Send Dad in with a sippy cup of water to cuddle him and help him get back to sleep. He might cry some when he realizes that he's going to get Dad and not Mom.....but he's NOT being left alone to cry himself to sleep! He's being comforted and loved by Dad. This worked very well for us when we night weaned our son around age 2.

Check out the link below for some more ideas.

Answer 2

Do not listen to the nut jobs who say two is too old. Two is fine. Three or four is fine, whatever works for you and your family.

Now assuming that you really want to stop (which is up to you, not me, not Aunt Maude, not your mom, not society). There are many ways to stop. They are all outlined here in way more detail than I could put here, plus my baby just woke up.
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/index.html

Best of Luck

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Hehe I reread your question not just what you added now that my baby is happy.
If you *want* you can keep the bedtime nursing, and any other nursing you want. If you just want to drop the night feedings this is what has worked for many of my friends (my baby isn't old enough to stop night feedings) also this only works toddlers.

Go get a cheap clock and some animals/whatnot you can stick on the hands and over the numbers (or you can make the clock yourself you can get clock parts cheap too, depends how crafty you are. Put an animal on the end of the hour hand and a different one on the end of the hour and minute hand(or you can just do the hour hand). Then cover all of the numbers with different things,

Then when you go to bed nurse him and say the "boobies" (or whatever you call them) are going to bed now. When the bear visits the turtle (or whatever the hour hand and the time in the morning is) then the boobies will wake up. If he wakes during the night point to the clock and say "The boobies are sleeping they will wake up when..."

You can also get a nightlight and put it on a timer and say the boobies are only awake when the light is on.

But I like the clock because you get more use out of it. You can say daddy will be home when the rabbit visits the dog, or whatever

You can, if you wish increase nursing during the day.

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html

Answer 3

First of all weaning at any age is never easy - I have friends who breastfed at night until their children were 4. It is a very personal decision and creates a bond that is very special. You are fortunate to have been able to go this long. There are many resources that help mothers wean older children and I cite one below. Experience has taught me that reintroducing the bottle is never a good idea - but you can express milk into the cup at night and encourage him to drink while sitting on you lap and you tell him how much you love him and are proud of what a big boy he is becoming. Children resist weaning for fear of rejection - cuddles and closeness need not lapse because breastfeeding stops, reassure your child they are very loved but it is time to be big and sleep all through the night and remember mommy is always near. Try tucking the blankets in tightly around him and maybe even using a bed rail. The important thing is he feel safe and secure even without your closeness at feeding time. You will both miss this part of babyhood but there is so much more to look forward to. Patience and courage - and stick to your decision. Good Luck!

Answer 4

I stopped feeding my daughter in the night when she was only 6 months but she would still wake up at night, I went into her room and would just hold her for a minute, and she would go back to sleeep. If she wouldn't sleep then I would get her a bottle with water in it. It did not take long for waking up to eat was no longer worth it. The before bedtime ritual should be changed, change the routine, or have your husband put him to bed. Mostly you should change up the routine and try to keep him busy before bedtime (reading stories, brushing teeth, singing songs ect...) My daughter drinks her last sippy cup with milk about 30 to 45 minutes before bed. It will take a while but you can do it...remeber that he will cry for a while but you need to stay strong and just cuddle him and not feed him. I promise he will get over it faster than you will. Good luck!

Answer 5

Hi sweetie two years old is not too old to still be nursing your son. Women in other countries nurse up to three or four years of age. However if you are trying to wean him yourself because you no longer want to breastfeed. I would do it very gradual. He shouldn't be getting up at all at night at his age right now. So I would feed him before bed time and then not again until the first thing in the morning. I would only bring him a bottle at night start with regular milk then switch to juice and then water over the next two weeks.If he knows you are not going to nurse him at night he may just give up and sleep all night without waking you up. I had to do the same thing when my son was two because I had another baby on the way. This worked well from me. So good luck to you honey.

Answer 6

First of all, good for you for nursing your little boy for so long. You might want to consdier whether you want to totally wean or just night wean (meaning he's not waking you up to nurse). I totally understand your wanting to get some more sleep. :) We night weaned my daughter at a little over 2 years. Basically we just would tell her that we would nurse when it got light outside, and there were a few protests, even a few tears, but we always held her and comforted her through them. If your little boy is going to lose the breast in the night, don't totally abandon him and make him deal with two losses. Be there for him when he's sad about it, snuggle him, hold him, etc. but be firm about no nursing. You can try it and see how it works for you guys. If he starts being really fussy or clingy during the day, he's probably not ready.

If you want to wean him entirely, I would start with night weaning and once he really feels okay about that then wean him from his bedtime nursing. But you might find that once he's not waking you up all night you might not mind one night feeding.

One possibility is that he's nursing so much at night because he doesn't get to during the day. If you would prefer the sleep you can try nursing him more during the day and that could make nightweaning easier.

Answer 7

Aww,all your little boy would no is the breast so you have to make it really exciting,take him with you into boots maybe and look at the cups/beakers for his age range,their all bright colours and would seem really interesting to him but go over the top when looking at them together 'ooh isn't this a nice BIG Boys cup!' even tho hes almost two years old hell still understand what your trying to say by th excited look on your face then when you get home try him with it and show him what to do.Once you give it to him though make sure you stick with it and don't go back to breast as this will only confuse and frustrate him and if he really wants a drink that much hell try his hardest to use the big boys cup! be patient praise him when he tries it,good luck! x

Answer 8

This is what i suggest. On a day when it is going to be a less stressful day, Saturday, Sunday or whenever is good for you, set the date! Tell him that tomorrow he is going to be too big for the breast (or whatever word he uses). When it comes the time that he would normally have it, before bed offer him a sippy cup. DONT whatever you do try a bottle or you'll have that problem next.

At night when he wakes and cries dont go in straight away. If you have to, then go in and say remember you dont have breast now, you are a big boy, and go away. He may cry, he may get out of bed if he's not in a cot. If he does just calmly put him back, and say no. You may have to do this 20 times! or more! but eventually he will get the message - he may cry himself to sleep. This may go on for nights but you have to be firm.You will feel dreadul and feel like giving in, but if you do you go back to the beginning again.

It is time he was off the breast, and he certainly should not be feeding at night. It is not something he needs for nutrition, it is habit and you will have to break him of it.

Maybe the day before go out and choose a new cuddly toy with him and give it to him at bedtime.

You have made this harder on yourself by carrying on letting him have the breast at night at this age. Dont make it even worse by not being firm when you have made up your mind.

Believe me, he will get out of the habit in a week or less if you are firm. Think about it, sleeping all through the night in a week's time! Worth the effort!

Go for it and good luck!

Answer 9

Two is not way too old. Although it is a good time to stop. People in the western world have a warped view on breastfeeding and until recently it was completely not accepted. (even for very young babies)
Try having someone else put him to sleep. (if there is someone) Try giving him a cup of milk or water if he wakes during the night and needs something.
The hard part is that he will just have to cry, and be upset at first.
Good Luck!

Answer 10

as a mom i will tell you that it is a special bond with that child. To make you feel better my friend breast fed her son until he was almost three and only at nighttime. Good luck and don't feel bad it is a natural thing and very healthy for your child. He is blessed i know a few people who refused the benefits of breat feeding because they didn't want to hurt there breast figure and now they regret it because they have lost a lot of teh fullness and volume in there breast!! Good luck