I often get depressed by people's attitudes; does anyone know a good way to restore faith in Human nature?

Question

I've never really been much of a social person; never been able to find people like myself, who think like me, who feel like me, who believe what I believe. Most of the time socializing is an enormous emotional drain, because I have to be so accommodating to others' behaviors. And from time to time I find myself feeling so alien, so ridiculous, so freakishly different that I simply cannot function. This was supposedly normal when I was in puberty, but I turn 40 next month, and the feelings have only deepened over time. The world seems so cruel and bleak sometimes: I can't fix it; I can't escape it; and I can't stand it.
I want to believe that the problem is me, that I should change myself, lower my expectations of other people. I can't seem to do that, though; foolish as it is, I expect people to act reasonably and responsibly. Why is that an unreasonable expectation? And why am I held to a reasonable standard while others are not?
Where are *my* people?

Answer 1

Focus on small acts of kindness . . .observing them and doing them . . .

very small steps might help out.

Answer 2

Maybe you should try not judging people so harshly and remember not everyone is on the same levels emotionally, mentally,above all spiritually no two people learn the same we all are different it just takes some people longer to get there then other, try not to let get ya down there r alot of good people out there, its not so much an unreasonable expectation per say, but i wouldn't put so much time and emotional energy into to relax go with the flow live and let live God is in control and worrying about how everyone Else's behaves seems like a waste of a time to me. I mean for it to bother you that much that cant be normal maybe the problem isn't with everyone else, I mean maybe you need to maybe look into the mirror and question whats wrong with you, and seek professional or spiritual help from a local church.. I mean the whole world cant be messed up, u have to be able to relate to someone...

Answer 3

I am close to the same age as you and have many of the same feelings. I have come to the place, early on, that I accept human nature for what it is. I do not hold high expectation anymore. Its so much easier and better IMO, to hold realistic, low, or no expectations and let people work from there. I test people out in small ways to see where they are at, to see if I can tolearate where they are at. Help them a little if I can and move on if needed. People are flawed, this world is flawed, we're all flawed. Its amazing anything gets done at all. It can be almost paralyzing at times. I have shed a good portion of my sphere of influence recently, gone into a hole. The important thing is to not take too long or get stuck. I can see a turn ahead for myself, where I'll go back out into the fray. I think its okay to step back once in a while, look around, make adjustments, prepare and go back out again.

We are resposible for ourselves and our actions. Live a life of as little regret as possible. Try your best to make your actions proud ones, that you feel good about owning. Help others, do random acts of kindness, expect no thanks or anything in return. Do good works in secret and don't tell anybody. Be the human you expect others should be, is all you can do. Be the example and don't expect it from others; but without expectation, vocalizing judgement and criticism, encourage everyone to do right.

You'll run into some good people out there. I've met some. Better ones than me. They are rare. They still have flaws. Life goes on and that's okay. Life is mercifuly short, fill it with the best you that you can be, stand tall and endure.

Answer 4

You sound depressed to me; we all feel this way sometimes. Yes, the world can look very bleak and cruel at times. Sometimes this passes, as it's only a mood. It happens to most of us, but we try to find a diversion.
People can be so dissapointing, especially if we place alot of expectations on them. I try not to expect too much of others, so that I am not disapointed.
Don't compromise yourself to try to fit in; unless this is really important to you. Take your friends at face value. Just go out with them, have a bit of conversation and a few laughs, and that is good. Don't expect all people to act reasonable and responsible; as many people won't! Just be concerned that you are ok with yourself. Keep improving yourself, read, accept challenges, do something fun, something you enjoy.
Maybe socializing beyond the ocassional fun things, is more than you are comfortable with. Some people just don't feel social; and that's just fine. It really isn't all that it's cracked up to be, you know. Do you like your own company? Find something to do that you really enjoy...that is sometimes very stimulating, and can make your time alone, alot more interesting. Plus, when you happen to be socializing with others, you'll have more to say, as it's something to say about yourself. You may find people like yourself by being who you truly are. If not, it's OK...being different is unique and some people love those who are themselves and don't worry about following the crowd; they are sometimes very shallow. As for as finding people who think like you do, act like you do, and believe as you do, that's tough...possibly you are alot more intelligent than some of the others that you socialize with.
What I'm trying to suggest is, focus on yourself, and the rest will take care of itself.
As for restoring faith in Human nature, you can look at the good things people have done for others, and you'll see that it's not all bad. It's in your perspective.
You can email me, if you want to talk further...
God Bless you

Answer 5

I am somewhat like you. I find it hard to tolerate people's behaviour which I can't seem to accept including my own friends.
I hardly go out or mix around much because i can;t seem to adapt in their world. I used to get too irritated and wanted so badly to correct them but I couldnt.
Over time, I got tired of it. I just began to ignore wat they are and expected what they are. I dont mix too much but just once a while. I am glad they do understand me and the fact is still the same, you can never expect people to act or behave the way we want them to be.

Yes u really need to change the way you look at it. Be what you are, and change your view towards them. I think u need to start eccepting everyone for them to eccept you. There is a reason god made everyone different !!

Answer 6

precise that is annoying to locate in undemanding words selfless acts making use of fact many human beings get excitement out of doing in any diverse case selfless acts, and is no longer it somewhat selfish in case you have excitement? yet, if excitement is o.ok. to have, then listed suitable listed under are some. I in undemanding words observed an attractive dachshund puppy. What gets me is that she become saved from a medical enterprise that become going to euthanize her... she become no longer a complication dogs or ill or some thing, yet they have been going to place her down! i'm so happy that she become saved making use of fact i become waiting to undertake her and he or she or he's plenty relaxing! different day on Yahoo! ideas somebody become finding for electric Engineers to assist answer some interview questions for a paper he become writing. i'm no longer an electric engineer yet i'm an engineer, so I spoke back as ultimate as i could desire to. He wrote me back an tremendously type word just to declare thank you. It gave me the warmth temperature and fuzzies!

Answer 7

Why so disturbed over other people's personalities? We are all made differently, yes, each on of us. We don't act the same, think the same or look the same.

There is good in every one of us, but evil is in the world and that's what you are zeroing in on. Our rewards are not here on earth...I'm sure you've heard that one.

It really sounds like you could take this problem to a good counselor!

Answer 8

There are heroes out there. They don't often make the news. Look carefully and you will see them, looking after the sick, elderly, poor, animals, etc, for no personal gain and no acknowledgement.

Answer 9

You are good human being..Dont change your self ..

Answer 10

stop watching too much tv.