sex is essential to me, at least! but my husband happens to not be as before prior to our miscarrige he was extremely sexually affectionated I know this is a personal problem but I just got out of bed to get this off my mind it bothers me I cried to him to ask him why he has not giving me any pleasure nor he has not giving me any oral sex? I stress about this he seems to react less absurd than I, he tells me that a relationship is more than just sex we are 20 years apart, also I know that his pass relationship sucked they rarely had sex if they did it would only be once a month,as crazy as it sounds i feel that if i were to be in that position I would be miserable like i am starting to feel anyways I need advice???!! I almost would like to walk away or "threaten" marriage just because i have not gotten LAID!
2006-11-18 22:05:28 · 12 answers · asked by mommy2be 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm sure it's the miscarriage. It's not only us that goes through it, men do too. They are also happy about the impending fatherhood coming their way. When they lose a child, it's just as hard on them although they may not show it to be strong for us. I lost a child. I was 4 months pregnant and it died inside. I had to have a D and C done. My husband and I slowed down greatly after that. We went even longer than the obligatory two months waiting. It's been 5 years, and things are only worse. Talk to him about the miscarriage. Tell him how you feel and see if you can get him to open up about his feelings. Was he there when it happened? If he was, and he saw how you were, he might be seeing you either as a child needing care yourself or as a mother. IF he saw what went on "down there", he may not find it so attractive at this point. Communication is essential, and yes, so is sex. And NO, men don't slow down if they are 20 years older. I know this for a fact. No, if anything, age makes men hornier.
2006-11-18 23:42:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is a tricky balance you have to maintain... You want to make sex exciting and something you really want, and can't wait to do... You don't want it to windup being a task you have to perform, something like taking out the garbage...
Give it a little time right now... Then suggest that the both of you need to talk to someone about your relationship... Tell him that you feel like you are losing him... and you want him closer... I'm sure that if he loves you he will agree to discuss the subject and try and please you...
2006-11-19 06:58:03 · answer #2 · answered by deakjone 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I find it amazing that people think they can violate the natural normal order of relationships and not have repercussions. Maybe you ought get we the guy who needs help with his older wife who doesn't want sex anymore. Men with a women 2 to 5 years younger seems to work best.
2006-11-19 10:04:24 · answer #3 · answered by Bollingg1 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
4 days seems a little quick for you to be climbing the walls already. How often was sex happening for you 2?
It could be one of those "ask your doctor" type questions. maybe he just needs levitra, or testosterone boosts.
2006-11-19 06:33:09 · answer #4 · answered by Brian 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You would leave him over not getting laid??? But he is 20 years older than you correct? so with that being said his sex drive probably is slowing down. Maybe you should have thought of that before you got married. Get some toys and stay with your husband
2006-11-19 06:13:21 · answer #5 · answered by kelsey 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you mentioned a miscarriage sorry for your loss. he may don't feel at ease performing oral so soon due to that reason. to be honest you have to talk with him to see why he don't have the urge for sex. he could be stressed about work/life or just tired. 20years is a gap for men. best of luck.
2006-11-19 06:12:26 · answer #6 · answered by =Bee-8-Nnn= 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don;t break the marriage - as he loves you.
Talk to him openly. If he does not listen go and have sex with a young person. He would not have any right to ask your faithfulness.
2006-11-19 06:10:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Get a vibrating shower head, then seek a marriage counselor.
2006-11-19 06:08:21 · answer #8 · answered by betty_htch 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you're husband doesn't give you as much sex as you'd like there's only one thing to do - get a vibrator.
2006-11-19 06:30:29 · answer #9 · answered by Peaches M 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
perhaps he is having some sexual trouble....tell him to ask his doc about it and also, buy a little rabbit and be patient for him.
2006-11-19 08:01:05 · answer #10 · answered by Akela 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋