hi i am only 18 but i want a baby so badly it hurts, ive only been with boyfriend for few months?

Question

what should i do should i take the chance of him leaving me to get pregnant?

Answer 1

you silly girl - if you go through with this just remember the thousands who have become pregnant by mistake and it has ruined their lives.

Your life must be sadly missing

Answer 2

If you and your partner want a baby, and you are financialy able to look after it then go for it, I say. Partying and going out isnt for everyone and if you think you are ready to settle down then you should ignore what everyone else is saying. Only you can know how mature and capable you are. Babies cry, sure, but noone here has mentioned the many good parts of being a parent, first smile, crawling etc, making new friends, and the love you feel more than make up for crying. I had my first child at 18 and am now 20 and expecting my second, my life is great and every day is filled with so much happiness.
Not everyone needs to go to college and get paid loads of money, if everyone did go to college then this society would fall apart. Also once you have a career already then it is a hard choice to make, do you put your child in childcare all day and work, or do you quit the job that you worked so hard for? I'm not saying feed off the state or anything, as long as you have a partner who works then you will have all the money you need.
Anyway sorry for going on, all I am trying to say is that being a mother is the most rewarding job in the world and if you think you are ready then go for it. Age is not a factor there are plenty of 30 year olds not ready to be a parent.

Answer 3

I think if your asking a question like this and you have only been with your boyfriend a few months then you are being very immature. Your 18, go out and have fun, do the clubbing, drinking, socialising.I have a daughter of 2 and am 6 months pregnant, don't get me wrong kids are fantastic. Enjoy your time as a couple, at least get to know your boyfriend properly before you make any life changing decisions, a baby should be made through love and not selfishness. having a baby should be a joint decision, don't trap a bloke into something he knows nothing about, the only way forwards from there is he will hate you and walk away from you both.

Answer 4

Your only 18, enjoy this time with you get to know who you are, don't have a baby to fix your problems because babys are hard work. I don't think your ready yet as I can see what I missed out on having a baby young and mine wasn't planned. Wait just 2 years at least so you have time to party and find yourself out of school, once you have a baby that baby is your whole life, you are no longer important as its all always about the baby.

Why do you want a baby so badly? What is it ablout having a baby that makes you hurt? Are you missing something in your life? Ask yourself what it is in your life that you miss that you want a baby to replace that hurt. Its not fare to bring a baby into this world knowing full well that you tricked your boyfriend to get you pregnant because you felt you needed a baby to live a happy life, kids grow up so very quickly. If you don't figure out what it is then you will be needing a baby.

I had my son out of wedlock with a guy I thought I loved because I fell pregnant on the pill, It wasn't until he was born I realise my son was more important then my life and my happiness. Your boyfriend may be a wonderful guy maybe even the guy you will have children with and marry, but do you really want to push the relationship when you can just enjoy getting to know each other first, time goes so very quickly and you'll be 21 before you know it.

Give your relationship time, you should be having a baby with the man you can't imagion your life without, children really need a stable relationship as they learn to parent within the first 5 years of there life and it is normally how they raise there kids, so you want to be able to give your child everything, money isn't an object to a baby, its all about the love and relationships they are born into. So don't have a baby for you as its not fare, let things happen in time when the baby thinks your ready as thats when they come when its right for them.

You will become a mum soon enough just enjoy been an adult first, I don't think you should wait 10 years or anything just a couple to give yourself time. Many young mums loose all their friends because you become a mum and they are enjoy the bit of freedom they have before meeting the right guy and have a baby.
Don't rush into this as its a life changeing event that cant be erased once its in process. A baby is for life. Only have a baby when you agree you and your partner are ready together as parenting is all team work. If it happens it happens but you shouldn't be trying at your age as you have so much life left to live and plenty of time for a family once you meet the right guy.

Best of luck.

Answer 5

What you really need to do is baby sit for someones kid for a weekend.It would be even better if it were 2 kids.2 or 3 days spent with them and I'll guarantee you change you're mind.You are so young.No one needs to have a baby until they're financially able and are more mature and have all their running out of them.Would you rather sit at home every weekend taking care of a baby or be out running around with you're friends or boyfriend doing the things that teenagers or young adults do?When you have a kid and someone calls and wants you to go out with them you have to worry about getting a babysitter.You always have to make plans in advance.And get a babysitter in advance.You no longer have the freedom you once knew.It's not easy being a parent.And sometimes it's not even fun.Enjoy you're life as you know it and slow down.Meet the right guy and take it from there.Do it the old fashioned way like I did.Fall in love get married then have a baby.You will be proud of yourself and so will you're parents.

Answer 6

I understand, I wanted a baby when i was 18 and I had been with my boyfriend for many years at that point. but I didn't have a baby, and I am glad. Now I have an education and a new boyfriend. I still want a baby very badly, but I know that the time will come and financially and emotionaly I will be ready. So my advise to you is don't do it, but be excited about haveing a baby one day in the future.

Answer 7

Trapping somebody to satisfy your own needs is very wrong. Just thinking the way you are right now shows your immaturity to become a parent. Having a baby is not easy, and a child deserves to have a father, so you shouldn't be 'taking a chance' on him possibly leaving you. I am not saying he wouldn't be in the child's life, but the man does not deserve to be put into this position and not have a say in what is a life changing event.
You need to grow up, finish college, get a decent education so that one day when you have a child that is a product of true love and long term stable relationship, you can pass your knowledge and experiences on. Having a child needs to be thought through, and then when you think you have done that, think it through once more to ensure you BOTH are ready for this. Parenthood should be both sided, not just about what YOU want - it is selfish.

Answer 8

I know exactly what you mean, I said that all through out my teens. I got pregnant at 18, had an abortion, think about it everyday. I still want a baby. My mom is very wise and she told me as well as my therapist that a baby is not to full fill my "wants" it will have it's own life and that is not fair to a little baby to have it out of WANT at such a young age without a for sure Daddy. You will make a great Mom someday. But focus on the FUN that you have yet to experience and try to let that over rule your desire for a baby right now. Once your pregnant, someone Else's life is at hand too. I've also read all your previous questions and you do not seem to be in the right situation or stage of life to be having a baby, but I'm no one to judge.

Answer 9

your still so young, you have more than enough time to have babies. get out there and expeirence some of lifes little pleasures before entering into the responsibility of parenting. If there is a chance you could be doing it all alone you should give it extra consideration. As a 35 y/o single mother of 3 beautiful girls I know first hand how hard it is. I didn't plan on doing it alone, but that's just the way it turned out. It is a daily struggle though, financially, emotionally and physically. Sit back and think about it alittle, like i said, you have plenty of time to have babies!

Answer 10

NO, dont do it. If you have only been with your boyfriend for a few months, how do you know you guys are meant to be? And that you guys can break up with or without a child. Dont bring a child into the world on purpose when there is a huge risk that that child will have to grow up in a broken home. Wait until you're ready, ive wanted a baby for soooo long and im 19 now (only a yr older) but ive been wiht my bf for 3 years, and we are financially able to care for the baby and we know after a long 3 yr relationship that we are going to stay together

Answer 11

You are being selfish and I will tell you why, right now you are thinking about yourself, what about the baby? do you think he wants to be born with no daddy or in a relationship where there is no marriage, no life insurance, no family assurance? Here is what you do:
Live it up first! you are still young, keep your mind busy in other things, like me, I went to college, I used to sing so I decided I wanted to learn hot to play the guitar, then the piano, went to parties, had lots of fun! Then when I was 23 I got married, then my husband and I learned how to live together, that is very important! we built up a GREAT relationship! as husband and wife, we went through a lot of things together trying to make the marriage work and we succeded, it was hard at times because marriage is not easy, but we survived the hard times, then we built up careers, we saved money we got a house, cars and 6.5 years later (Now in our 30's) we decided it was time for a baby and we BOTH wanted it really bad so I quit my pill and here I am 29w prehnant and READY. I feel like we did and acomplished so much! and one of the best gifts of God has been given to us because we have done the right thing. Our baby is SO loved from BOTH sides that it makes it even more special!
Give time to time, it will all come to you, do not rush anything, it is not good for you or the baby. There is nothing like doing things the right way. When I was your age, I did some stupid things, like things teenagers do you know and now that I think about it I feel like SO dumb, I'm like wow I did that? LOL I was just young and stupid. You cannot think straight when you are that age, your hormones are just out of control, so don't let a baby pay for your "not well thought decisions" and remember:

THE OLDER YOU ARE THE LESS MISTAKES AS A PARENT YOU WILL MAKE.