Ok let’s see if I can explain this little better me and the wife are married for nine yrs, with a lot of problems. So I decided to move out to try to save our marriage it’s been five months now, since then she started going to her friends, which I knew was a bad move any way because her friend is nothing but trouble. Since then she had meant this guy ok that’s cool they are friends as she put it, so I left it go. Later on down the road I find out they are dating so I said ok if that’s what she wants I then find out that he has been incarcerated for 2 yrs, and now collecting SSI so I had ask her what’s up with that she tells me none of your business now I’m concern because I no nothing about him till this day all I no is his first name and where he is from.
It gets better he has now move in with my wife and my 8 yr old daughter and 23 months old son now I’m HOT and she still isn’t telling me anything so today I went to get my children and I had ask my daughter how comes the bum (he) don’t work and she went on to tell mom said he jumped off a bridge. Now this brings grate concern about my wife and this bum not to mention my children. Should I just take my chances and keep my children or let them go home ? Now I see why she wasn’t telling me anything HELP PLEASE!!!
2006-11-18 13:43:09 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get a lawyer as fast as you can. that guy sounds like major trouble.
2006-11-18 13:46:08 · answer #1 · answered by carriec 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your children go to school, well the one any way, then I'd mention to her teacher and have her guidence consuler could help, and if not i'd take one or both of the childeren to a "shrink" just to have them evaluated and tell them about your susspisons. I wouldn't let your wife know to start with and I'd check all the different possiblites and then go from there. If your "gut" filling is telling you she's hurting them I'd get thoes to a consouler and or ask there teacher to talk to her,(them). I hope this helps I mean I'm 17 but I think that's the best advice I could come up with for I surivied being slapped around when I was younger, because at school I talked to my teacher and eventually she had me talk to the consouler and that helped a lot, plus I got out of that situation. I really hope this helps good luck, but don't wait too long to do somthing, your kids life could be at steak. ~Alison~
2006-11-18 22:07:01 · answer #2 · answered by luvracin_ia2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a b : You are in a BIG mess. Obviously, it's over between you and your wife. Your wife has a new man in her life and your children to "boot". This ex-con she is with has done a number on her, and has her brain turned inside out. Your wife is in for a big lesson in life - you will have to get yourself a good lawyer now to get visitation rights to your kids. I can't see why you moving out for 5 months would save your marriage but enough said on that point. You have to look at the situation with you and your ex wife is just that - an ex wife. Women are strange because when they don't feel loved, they usually, will eventually, find someone who will love them. Good luck to you.
2006-11-18 21:55:58 · answer #3 · answered by guraqt2me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you keep your children and you guys have a court order about when visitation is then you could be charged with interferring with child custody and in my state (Wisconsin) that is a felony and you do not want that.
Your best bet is to pretend to get along with her for now, figure out what you guys are going to do with this mess of a marriage and then go for custody of your kids. You could also seek temporary custody as of right now, but without paperwork, I would say it's best you don't do anything too stupid. See what she would say to you keeping them for awhile. I'm sure that won't work out too well, but you never know. You can also file something with the Bureau of Child Welfare anonymously and tell them what is going on in the home and that you fear for your childrens safety and want them to be with you.
Keep in mind that more often than not, custody is granted to the mother.
Good luck. For now, I would say keep things flowing as smoothly as possible. You don't want to do anything that she could use against you in court when you do go for full custody.
It would also be wise for you to seek the help of a lawyer and get divorce proceedings started.
2006-11-18 21:48:59 · answer #4 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would check the sexual pedifiles list and also talk to your local police department because if he in any way puts your children in danger they could go to foster care and then you would have a battle on your hands. And I would tell her you are getting an order of protection and keeping the kids.
2006-11-18 21:49:54 · answer #5 · answered by Samantha B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't they have investigative sites here on the net where you can inquire about someone and their history? I know that most states have a web site where you can look up a persons incarceration history. That could be a start. Good luck.
2006-11-18 21:46:55 · answer #6 · answered by inquisitive 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on what state you live in, there should be some way for you to look his name up and see what he went to jail for.
I don't know about you, but I would demand for her to tell me about this man! Let her know she needs to make you feel secure with your children living with him in the house. If she disagrees, go to court. Divorce her and take your children. Not out of spite, but for the kids safety.
2006-11-18 21:49:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
KEEP THEM KIDS!!!! can you live with yourself if something happens to them????? We alll need to make sacrifices for our kids and it may make a bit of a hardship for you for a little bit until you get things together but please for the safety of those kids just keep them with you, she has no legs to stand on, and you can use the fact that she was incarcerated etc... for your defense.. These kids deserve better than what she is offering to them. Get a good lawyer and good luck
2006-11-18 22:12:34 · answer #8 · answered by melissa052572 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since your not divorced, I don't see why you can't keep them and then file for divorce and custody. Get a good attorney (father's rights) be prepared to spend some money. I hope you can keep them. She obviously isn't as worried about your children as she is her new boyfriend. Good luck!!
2006-11-18 21:49:17 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your marriage is over......so don't worry about reconciliation. you need to contact a lawyer.... but it seems to me that having a convicted felon in the home with your two young children is a problem. i would keep the kids until your lawyer states other wise.
2006-11-18 21:51:10 · answer #10 · answered by beckdawgydawg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋