would u b annoyed 2?or am i overreacting?

Question

my other half has just give me a xmas basket 4 my birthday (santa teddy bear candle 07diary ) am i being ungrateful?or do u think he should have put more thought into it i didnt even get a card im fed up b/c i always make an effort 4 him it was nice but u could clearly c it was a xmas present.i told him to shove it b4 u all start bitching at me he never makes an effort at anything and i had enough

Answer 1

I thought it was always "the thought that counts?" Yes, you are being ungrateful. Just because you put in a lot of effort in getting him gifts, it doesn't mean he's going to be as good as you are. Most men aren't like women when it comes to gift giving. They are not usually good at things like that. With that said, people who give gifts prefer to be thanked, not ridiculed for it. And like you said, he doesn't put in much effort in anything. How would you like it if you didn't get anything at all?

Answer 2

If you've had enough, then get the f*** out! You are a selfish person too! You should be happy that your man got you anything at all. Some men wouldn't remember a Holiday if you glued a calendar to their forehead. It's nice of you to put lots of thought into what you do for him. But, the enjoyment of a gift is supposed to be in the GIVING not in the RECEIVING! Either leave and go find a millionaire who can give you the kind of gifts you think you deserve or give him a break!

Answer 3

Could it have been merely a "Joke?" If there is still something good between you too, I think you should try looking at the positive side. . . that always, . . its the thought that counts. Haven't you considered that some efforts were also exerted in preparing that xmas basket? You can have a big laugh with him about this. Now, if, per your experience, no thought comes with the present, then by all means, be annoyed.

Answer 4

that is frustrating. I agree with you that there was no effort! my husband is the same way! We even spent my 20th birthday sitting in his office while he played cards and got drunk until midnight with his buddies. I feel your frustration. I read an article though that said you really need to be blunt with a man when you want something special. Leave real hints like circling stuff in magazines or taking him to a store and point out things. Subtltly is lost on men. I know that kind of sucks but its just what you have to do. But try and be a litle more grateful because you could be stuck with nothing. Hope you get a better xmas present!

Answer 5

I think you are being ungrateful. Some men just don't know how to shop, or what to get for gifts. Is christmas your favorite holiday? Does he think it is? Some men don't even buy gifts. And is he really not making an effort, or are you expecting too much? Men are simple creatures, and are mainly clueless. They think differently than we do. If your expecting flowers for no reason, and other stuff that happens in the movies, you're going to be disappointed in all of your relationships. Also, it is rude to tell anyone to 'shove it', especially after they have given you a gift. My hubby bought me the ugliest coat in the world for christmas last year, and instead of yelling at him for not getting what I asked for, or telling him it was ugly, I actually looked at him. He was so excited, and thought that he had given me the best thing in the world. So I kissed him, and told him it was beautiful, and wore it when we went to Tahoe...

Answer 6

Men are men. Do you like to write? Maybe he saw the basket and thought that it was something you would like. The only difference is its not Christmas yet but maybe the store did not prepare a birthday basket with those items.

I think it's the thought that counts. I'm sure he was not trying to stiff you on Christmas. If it was a Thanksgiving basket then you have all right to be upset but I wouldn't if I was you.

Answer 7

What's so sad about your situation is maybe it is his best effort. Why don't you just make him give you cash. At least then you get something you really want. My husband brings me flowers and perfumes, but the real gifts I buy myself. I take him along of course and tell him okay honey see this...my birthday present from you, my christmas present from you...etc. That way you can still show off the beautiful gifts he buys you, you get what you want, and he learns your taste so he can buy you things as a surprise later. Try it, it has gotten me some pretty big rocks so far. Good luck.

Answer 8

You are not over reacting and you are totally justified in feeling ignored. All of this is magnified because you have moved to a new city for him and he is not making enough effort for you in return. I would really try not to get angry and speak to him calmly. Tell him you were worried about him and this is the second time he has done this. See what his reaction is. Tell him you just want to know what is going on so you can plan your evening meal with or without him. Simple as that. See what he says. It sounds like he is just being an idiot and not considering your feelings first.

Answer 9

No you are not overreacting, he obviously is an idiot and has no clue as to what you like or would like to receive as a gift. I am not sure if you have sat down and tried to talk to him and let him know how you feel about his lack of effort towards you. If that doesn't work then stop putting any effort into what you buy for him, get him a halloween gift from last year for x-mas.. That was just a silly example. Or if you still can't deal then maybe it is time to move on and find a man that will show you that he cares about you and what you like in your life. Good luck

Answer 10

You should never say anything about a gift some one gives you no matter what! It's some thing he wanted you to have! Maybe it took alot of thought for him to put it together! I don't think you are over reacting, but I do think you are being greedy!
Material things never make a relationship! If they do they never work out!

PS. Never look a gift horse in the mouth!
( as my dad use to say! )