An ex-wife gets a check for child support, should she use it all for the child, or for the whole family?

Question

The ex-husband is on disability income, the ex-wife gets a check from SS for child support, but doesn't use it to buy the child clothes and school supplies and other things that the child really needs. When asked about it, she says that she uses it to provide food and shelter for the child. Isn't she and her now husband suppose to do that anyway with the income they get from their jobs? She and the present husband have two more children now, The present husband quit work and is not trying to get disability, and I am not sure what is wrong with him. Seems to me that he should provide some income, and that would be an income from him, an income from her, an income from SS, and the child is 17 now and working part time, providing a little for needs. I do the best I can, which can not be much since I am on disability. Am I suppose to do more when they are getting, or suppose to be getting 4 checks from 4 different sources?

No,mnemows, I see you didn't get it at all. I I wished I had custody, and I was given a support check, I would use it for what the child needs and keep on paying rent and other things as I have been doing. I think it must be you who is stupid for not understanding this. You think it is right for her husband to just sit there and not try to provide for the family, while he makes the wife use the child support for him too?

Answer 1

In general child support is to take care of the child which includes rent water lights heat and food.Clothes and school supplies should be bought with it also,The parents that the child lives with should be providing this things them self,but if not then the child support would be used for it.I know when my husband does get child support for the kids we take them to get new clothes Cd's or what ever they want,we meet all of their needs and most of their wants.They always know when we get child support,and we let them split it and use it how they want.If you feel like you need to help out your step child if you can I would just buy what they need take them shopping or something but I wouldn't send extra money.

Answer 2

Yes, the money should be used for the child and the child only. But in every case I have ever seen, the money is spent on everyone and not just the child the money should be spent on. I don't understand people or the justice system anymore period. I know how it is to be on disability. I am also on disability and it is hard enough to make it on my own without having to give money to a child that the money isn't even used for. If I was you, I would call the SS office and ask them about this. I don't know if they can help you or not, but it is sure worth a try. You would have to probably provide some proof that the money isn't used for just the child but I don't know. I have not seen one case yet where someone I know that gets child support spends the money on the child only. The money is always spent on bills, food, buying themselves something instead of the child, etc.... I do not understand why they can't do something to stop this and make sure the money is only spent on the child. Since the child is now 17, you won't have to pay child support much longer, but that is beside the point. People are so greedy now days and it seems to be all about money. Good luck to you and hope things work out for you VERY SOON. This is not right and never has been and I am afraid to say that it will probably never be right. If your ex-wife is remarried, her husband should provide for all of the family, including your child as far as I am concerned and spend the child support on clothes, shoes and things like that for your child. But I have not seen one person yet do what they should with child support money.

Answer 3

Unfortunately its nearly impossible to actually control what the money is spent on. There is far more to supporting a child than food and clothes...housing, insurance, school supplies....everything takes a bite out of the income. I am a single father paying support for my son. I generally used to just pay for his daycare and that covered my end of it. Now I give his mother a check. Regardless of who's money is spent ...he is supported.
You said your child is 17,,so soon enough you will not be bound to pay support anymore( unless you have a court decree stating otherwise). In an extreme case you can always consult with legal counsel to see what your options are.

Answer 4

It all depends on what state you're living in. In my state (WI), and most others, child support is based solely on the non-custodial parent's income. Has nothing to do with what that person's spouse makes. As for your situation, if you truly have the kids 50% of the time, there shouldn't be any child support changing hands. If you're that worried about it, I would hire a lawyer and get the support order amended.

Answer 5

I'm not sure I understood all of your question, but the benefits any mother receives from social security are to be used for all the things her child needs. There is rent, insurance, food, clothing, utilities, furniture, etc. to be paid for. She isn't required to see that every penny is spent specifically on one child. That would mean that none of the housing, food, utilities, etc. that the one child used was being paid by the SS check.

Most of you guys seem just plain stupid. Anyone taking care of your half of the responsibility for a child is underpaid no matter how much they get for it or where it comes from. If you had custody you would be entitled to the benefits (such as they are) as well.

Answer 6

The child support system is terribly flawed. Yes, it's too bad that the paying ex can't have SOME assurance that the money is going to the child(ren). But, that would create an accounting nightmare.

Just try to come to peace with the fact that you are helping your child(ren) the best you can.

Answer 7

Child support is money that should go to support the child, not money the mother should use for her own needs. If she really cannot take care of the child, maybe the custody agreement should be amended?

Answer 8

dude thats bs! your money should be going to your kid period! now,the buying of the food ,yea i think she can buy food with your income cuz after all your kid is eating there right?but the rest of the money should all go to your kid.i dont think u should have to do anymore but if she is not getting what she needs from your child support payments thats pretty fd up so u have to either take legal action or suck it up and shell out more money and make sure your kid gets it straight from your pocket. oh and another thing if you do buy your kid anything out of your pocket SAVE THE RECEIPTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in case you have to show a judge your supporting your kid good luck

Answer 9

she should use it for the child. No questions asked. That is why it is called "Child Support"

Answer 10

regardless of what they are getting from other sources, the child is still yours and you have to pay. the system sucks, but there isn't anything you can do about it.